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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

Date Night...BLEGH!

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:55 PM
  • 33 Replies
So I feel like a bad wife... Since DD has been born (she is now 13 months) DH and I have only had one official date night. I just have such a hard time leaving her. We co-sleep and she nurses to sleep and usually nurses pretty frequently at night and we are not ready for night weaning.

I just feel like I havent been giving enough attention to my DH. We spend time together once he gets off of work, but we do not go out together. He goes out with his buddies every couple of weeks which is great, but I have no desire to do the same. I am just super attached to DD and do not want to leave her.

If earlier date nights would be an option that would be nice but we really don't get the opportunity because my husband has a crazy work schedule.

Any advice, I just feel like a super obsessed mommy, and awful wife.
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 2:55 PM
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Replies (1-10):
eckielady
by Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:00 PM

I'm the same way. Plus I'm not sure how I could leave her since I'm nursing anyway?!?  Does this bother your husband? If it doesn't bother him then I wouldn't worry about it. If it does then can you compromise? You can always have date nights at home. Movies after DD goes to bed, or playing cards......a romantic dinner maybe? I don't think date nights need to always be done away from home.

SAHM927
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:03 PM
He mentioned once that it does bother him.. and we argued a bit about it for a couple days and he hasnt mentioned it since. I try to cook nice dinners for him to do an "at-home date night" but I dont think its the same for him.

I have the same mindset, it is so hard to be away from her when nursing. Not to mention getting really full at night because I missed her night-time feeding, I mean seriously, "Hold that steak, I gotta pump!"
Quoting eckielady:

I'm the same way. Plus I'm not sure how I could leave her since I'm nursing anyway?!?  Does this bother your husband? If it doesn't bother him then I wouldn't worry about it. If it does then can you compromise? You can always have date nights at home. Movies after DD goes to bed, or playing cards......a romantic dinner maybe? I don't think date nights need to always be done away from home.


Glowing4Caleb
by Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:16 PM

I found with my first, that if we went out at night and I missed a feeding, I would just pump in the car. I had a battery pack for my pump. My son now is only 3 months, so no date nights yet. You do need to spend some time with the hubby though to keep your marraige strong. Just be sure to leave plenty of pumped milk with the sitter and you will be a-ok! :)

fahmom
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:16 PM
Don't feel bad. How does your DH feel about it?

My DS is the same age and we have never had a date night since he was born. My DH is just as bad as me when it comes to leaving our DS with anyone. The only time we have been anywhere without DS was on his birthday when our moms watched him while we picked up his cake. Unfortunately both our moms live out of state. We are perfectly content with family outings. We enjoy our time together as a family. Tuesday is our only day completely off together. We are both working and in college and manage to keep our DS out of childcare. I have lightened up to allow DS to go to childcare at church only for my DH to say absolutely not. Our us time is when DS is asleep. We will watch movies, or just cuddle but always watching DS on the baby monitor.
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awilliams77
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:19 PM
What about a mid-day date if he has a day off? We did the in home date night too, when I was nursing.
jrsmommy0427
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:25 PM
My hubby is lucky then! Lol but we do live with his parents so that makes it easier to just get up and leave... He is great about saving money once I showed him my ways, so he doesn't mind at home dates... The baby is still young and its good to get to enjoy this time with her now! You guys have tons of date nights ahead of you =]
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aimhawk
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 3:27 PM

We just have dinner dates or do other things where I can wear DS. We do a lot of family things on the weekends with both kids. Make a picnic or something like that.

Amberleigh81
by Silver Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 4:10 PM
Can you go out midday for a date? Lunch date on his day off?
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sreichelt26
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 7:24 PM

Same here - she just turned 1. You have to just do it - it gets a little easier to leave each time. I still think of her/miss her every time we go out (every 4-6 weeks) and can't wait to get home to her, but it's nice to have time alone to talk and actually eat a meal without scarfing it down because dd wants my attention.

Quoting SAHM927:

We co-sleep and she nurses to sleep and usually nurses pretty frequently at night and we are not ready for night weaning. 
zannahdeux
by Bronze Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 7:25 PM
I put our dates nights in his black berry lol
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