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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

One feeds too much and the other does not feed enough!

Posted by on May. 6, 2012 at 10:21 AM
  • 12 Replies

So my mom watches my girls while I work.  She is really good with them and she does a great job.  I have a 5 month old and a 2 and half year old.  So you guys knows that a lot. Not to mention she does it for free! 

Here is my issue.  My mom is old school!  She did not breast feed at all.  I've told her everything you guys told me about how much baby should eat and she ignores me.  She told me I need to stay off this damn computer.  I usually take about 14 ounces because I'm a teacher and sometimes I have to stay at work late.  8 ounces just won't be enough.  Well lately she started feeding my daughter 5 ounces every 3 hours.  I told her that is too much and she doesn't listen.   My mom is not the type of lady you want to piss off, if you catch my drift. 

When my daughter has doctor's appointments she usually meet me their with the kids.  Her dr is less than 5 mins from my job.  I should up late at the last appt. and the dr. told my mom that it was alright to start solids.  I've already told my mom that I was waiting until she turns 6 months this time around (I started earlier with my 2 year old).  I also told her that I wasn't doing cereal this time around also.  She thinks I'm crazy and starts talking about how she gave all of her babies cereal.  Well this week she went out and bought a couple of jars of baby food.  She did respect my wishes and did not get cereal.   Why can't she just wait a couple of weeks?   I appreciate my mom so much!  She has really been there for me.  My husband and I are separating so things are about to get really hard.  I'm going to really need her.  We are about to move back in with her next month. 

On days when my mom has doctor's appointments we take the kids to my brother.   I drop them off at 7 a.m and picked them up close to 6 p.m.  The baby had only had less than 7 ounces!  That's not enough!  He says that he only feeds her when she cries.  My mom likes to feed her before she cries. 

I don't know what to do.  Right now my family is all I have. 

BTW I miss talking to you guys.  For some reason the school system blocked this site.  I used to come on everyday while I pumped.  I hate doing it on my phone.  By the time I get home and get stuff ready for the next day I'm to tired to log on. 

by on May. 6, 2012 at 10:21 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mollysmom328
by Stephanie on May. 6, 2012 at 10:35 AM

Honestly, if baby only had 7 oz then that's all she really "needed" to get by for the day so it is enough for her.  See if your mom can give bottles of about 2.5 oz every 2 hours (try saying that that is how often she nurses so she needs to eat a little smaller quantity more often).  I don't know if that will work.  5 oz every 3 hours isn't *awful*, it is over feeding but it's up to you if you want to fight her on that.  If it works for you then you could leave it as is. 

Marti123
by Bronze Member on May. 6, 2012 at 10:43 AM
If you pre-made the bottles, would that deter her?

Does she read, if you print off NEW reputable research studies supporting your stance? Is she ok with child seats and newer cribs? Does she believe is sunscreen? Or any other changes since she raised kiddos, that you can draw an anology between, to demonstrate how research changes?

If you truly have no other options for childcare really do not have a choice.
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SewingMamaLele
by Leanne on May. 6, 2012 at 11:05 AM
I would remind her that she can only have what you are able to pump, and that youre working hard to pump enough, so you need her to work with you on this and make sure to only give her what she needs.
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Jmommy823
by on May. 6, 2012 at 11:16 AM
I measure out bottles for my MIL. My MIL watches my ds for free also so I know it can be hard because you don't want to step on any toes or sound ungrateful because you aren't...you just want what is best for your baby. Unfortunately you can't always change our parents mentality that thy did it with us and we turned out okay. That's really annoying that your doctor told your mom that. I mean sure you CAN start your kids on solids...but you can do a lot of things. It doesn't mean it's good or that you want to. I would recommend the premeasured bottles and ask her politely to wait. I personally always like to be the first to give my ds foods because what of he does have an allergic reaction. I would be really upset if something happened and I wasn't there.
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mommy2Alyssa24
by on May. 6, 2012 at 1:14 PM
Thanks for your advice ladies. I just really needed to vent. You know how parents can be. They think they know it all. I wonder will I be the same way
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cmack40487
by on May. 6, 2012 at 1:16 PM
Find a new daycare provider.
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mommy2Alyssa24
by on May. 6, 2012 at 1:20 PM


Quoting Jmommy823:

I measure out bottles for my MIL. My MIL watches my ds for free also so I know it can be hard because you don't want to step on any toes or sound ungrateful because you aren't...you just want what is best for your baby. Unfortunately you can't always change our parents mentality that thy did it with us and we turned out okay. That's really annoying that your doctor told your mom that. I mean sure you CAN start your kids on solids...but you can do a lot of things. It doesn't mean it's good or that you want to. I would recommend the premeasured bottles and ask her politely to wait. I personally always like to be the first to give my ds foods because what of he does have an allergic reaction. I would be really upset if something happened and I wasn't there.


Thats what I'm going to start doing. 

tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on May. 6, 2012 at 1:36 PM
3 moms liked this

my school blocked the site too but unblocked it after a while..

Make only 1 extra bottle and make each bottle 3oz...

PLUS if she can not follow your directions about the care of YOUR child no matter how great she has been find another caregiver.  HOnestly 7 oz is not bad, your baby reverse cycled.  Taking less than normal is fine but overfeeding is NOT.  A baby can make up for missed ounces at the breast thus helping supply but when overfed baby will nurse less and that will hurt supply.

Solids...tell her she is only to give the solids YOU approve when you approve it..your child YOUR rules.  I dont care what she did before this is YOUR child.  This will only get worse if you do not stop it now.

She may take your babies riding in the car with no carseats because she didnt use them with her kids...when she risks your childs life what do you say then? Stop her NOW

jjchick75
by Silver Member on May. 6, 2012 at 2:42 PM

If it were me I'd make it very clear that she is my baby and she will follow my rules. If she can't do that, I'd find someone else to watch my kids. It's not only hard on your supply, she is hurting your baby by feeding her so much. It's not good for her tummy.

kathislove80
by on May. 6, 2012 at 2:48 PM
This


Quoting jjchick75:

If it were me I'd make it very clear that she is my baby and she will follow my rules. If she can't do that, I'd find someone else to watch my kids. It's not only hard on your supply, she is hurting your baby by feeding her so much. It's not good for her tummy.


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