twins fighting while nursing, mom wants to wean
i am nursing my 17 month old twin dd and have been lucky enough to have minimal problems. because of this, my friend who is nursing her 16 month old b/g twins and she comes to me often with questions.
today she said that the babies pull each others hair and seem 'very jealous' of each other while tandem nursing and she is thinking she should wean them to stop the fighting. she said if she bf them separately there aren't any issues but for the last 4 days she's weaned them only in the morning and at night and today only in the morning.
she said neither of them want to stop and they climb on her lap and pull on her shirt and cry their eyes out when she refuses to let them nurse. she is upset and feels guilty and is now questioning her decision. she doesn't have a lot of support and lives across the country from me so i can't help her much except through fb.
i told her there are certainly benefits of continuing but the final decision is hers. (we are standing firm on child-led weaning with our girls but i understand this is not for everone. it took me a LONG time to understand this, but i try to not get so connected with other people's nursing relationships) at 10 months she said she didn't know if she wanted to bf any longer. her ds1 is 3 1/2 and she never nursed him once because she just didn't feel like it. she loves nursing now but i think the duration is getting ot her a little bit.
i told her that a lot of times, moms who force their children to wean because of their own issues often regret it once the child has fully weaned. i told her to pray on it, and make sure that whatever decision she makes, make sure it's one she can live with.
along with that, i told her the fighting while nursing should be addressed as if they were fighting at any other time. i don't think the nursing is the issue and i think they need to be disciplined weather it's talking to them, time outs, etc. not sure how she'll respond but i was polite and objective as possible. did i miss anything other than address the fighting rather than nursing and pray on it? anyone else out there nusing twin toddlers who fight whie tandem bf? tips and tricks? thanks!!