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loved breastfeeding but not sure i can do it with a one year old and newborn..

Posted by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:02 PM
  • 53 Replies

ok so here is my story. i breastfed my son til he was 3 1/2 months old. i loved it. i loved the bond it gave me with him, and it felt so natural. my only problem with it was that he wanted to be on me 24/7. i couldn't sleep because when i took him of the boob he would wake up and cry til i put him back on. when he was around 3 1/2 months old i realized that he wasn't getting enough food, so we switched him to formula. i cryed for days i felt like i failed him. anyways around the time i stopped breastfeeding i got pregnant again. im really want to breastfeed the next one when he/she is born, but i am worried for a few reasons

1. i wouldnt be able to handle breastfeeding and a 1 year old. as in will it take time away from my first?

2. this next baby will be like my first and want to be on me at all times, night and day.

3. what if the same thing happens with my first and i stop producing around 3 1/2 months.

breastfeeding is something special to me. it does not bother me to do it in public. also i should tell you that i tried pumping with my first and no luck, i couldn't get anything out with manual or electric. only by hand expressing. any advice is welcome, and if you have breastfeed a newborn, and took care of sibling (close in age) please let me know how that turned out for you.

by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:02 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mama02040608
by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:27 PM
7 moms liked this
Some babies are just like that and some aren't. My first was chill and my second made me question my sanity. But babies especially newborns, are meant to need you 24/7...it's a primal survival mechanism :)

A new baby, period, will take away from your first :) You just have to be more creative and learn your new role.

Define "stopped producing". Generally, barring major medical problems or anomalies in baby, your supply doesn't just disappear after a few months of successful BF. If we explore this, we can help you over come the hump.

I had 3 under 3 at one point and all were BF :) It can work if you want it to work. I won't lie, 2003-2006 are pretty foggy for me, but I'm on the other side now :)
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larissalarie
by Platinum Member on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:31 PM
8 moms liked this
It's extremely unlikely that you weren't making enough, this is a common misperception that happens. It's more likely he was growing and your supply regulated. The only true indication of supply is diapers. 6 a day and baby is getting plenty.

Now you CAN breastfeed with a toddler around. What do you think those pioneer women did? And they didn't have any of the modern conveniences that we enjoy today! I hear this excuse a lot and the bottom line is that you will figure it out and make it work if breastfeeding is what you truly want to do. A second baby doesn't deserve breastmilk any less just because he wasn't born first. No matter what, a new baby is going to be a challenge and take away from your older child, that's just a fact of having more than one kid.
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sreichelt26
by Gold Member on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:36 PM
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first, how were you determining that you weren't producing? because of the constant nursing? that's normal and sounds like a growth spurt. diapers are the ONLY indicator of supply - if diapers are fine, your supply is fine. 

I have not personally been where you are - still only have one, but I have several friends who are or have tandem nursed their newborn and 1 year old or are at least nursing the newborn. You just make it work. Wearing the new one in a sling/moby helps because baby can nurse in there while you get things done. have special books/toys/activities to do with your 1 yr old while baby is nursing. Co sleep at night.

SewingMamaLele
by Leanne on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:36 PM
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My first was my only 24/7 nurser, super clingy baby... both his siblings (so far!) just do their business and then go back to sleep and are/were fine sleeping anywhere.   It's more personality than anything and feeding method won't change their personality.  :)

You won't just dry up out of the blue unless you become pregnant again or start taking an estrogen based birth control... so no worries there.

New babies take time from older sibs no matter what... I found nursing made it easier because I'd have hands free to play with big sib while baby ate.   Baby just intigrated into our lives and didn't cause a huge disturbance since breastfed babies are (generally!) so easy to care for. 

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caribear77
by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 6:54 PM
Some babies want to u around 24/7, u r mom. All 4 of mine like to b with me as much as possible. Yeh, when babes r little they need mom most the time. I think its normal.

How do u know u dried up? Keep nursing, eat right, & drink lots, u should b fine. Pay attention 2 them both & play/snuggle with both. U can do it.

I have 4 kids, u can b a super mom to all of them if u try.
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hthrlcl
by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 7:16 PM

well when i say stopped producing, i mean even the dr said he wasn't getting enough. he was not gaining weight right. it was kind of touch and go from the start. he was 6 p 7 o when born, and he got down to 5 p. 7 o a week after he was born, which i know is normal for them to lose, but he just never put on weight, and if he did it was only a couple ounces every few weeks. he was in like the 3rd percentil. so the dr suggested i try formula, and after that he just started sprouting up lol. he is now a happy 7 month old. i like to say im a good mom, yes my son is spoiled, but im worried about my ability as a mom to handle a one year old and a newborn, while breastfeeding. and if i dont breastfeed i feel like im not doing the best i can, and what if it is to much, and i can't handle it?

asaffell
by Bronze Member on Jul. 13, 2012 at 7:19 PM

How do you know that it will be any different NOT breastfeeding? And with formula, you'll have bottles and cleaning that you don't when you nurse. I'd stop worrying about what might happen and just go with it.

Baby_Avas_Momma
by Elizabeth on Jul. 13, 2012 at 7:24 PM
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Whether you breastfeed or formula feed, your baby will still need you equally. Wouldn't it be easier to just pop a boob in the baby's mouth instead of constantly preparing and cleaning bottles? If it's something you want to do, then do it! Invest in a sling/wrap and you can take care of the new baby while taking care of your other baby :)
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mama02040608
by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 7:27 PM
4 moms liked this
BF babies only need to gain one pound a month minimum. That is calculated from lowest weight, not birthweight. So if your son was 8-7 at 3mos, your supply was fine. As far as percentiles go, someones gotta be 3 just as much as there needs to be someone @ 93. Percentiles mean NOTHING. Diapers and consistent gain along with meeting milestones are more important.

Quoting hthrlcl:

well when i say stopped producing, i mean even the dr said he wasn't getting enough. he was not gaining weight right. it was kind of touch and go from the start. he was 6 p 7 o when born, and he got down to 5 p. 7 o a week after he was born, which i know is normal for them to lose, but he just never put on weight, and if he did it was only a couple ounces every few weeks. he was in like the 3rd percentil. so the dr suggested i try formula, and after that he just started sprouting up lol. he is now a happy 7 month old. i like to say im a good mom, yes my son is spoiled, but im worried about my ability as a mom to handle a one year old and a newborn, while breastfeeding. and if i dont breastfeed i feel like im not doing the best i can, and what if it is to much, and i can't handle it?

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Lorraine2674
by on Jul. 13, 2012 at 7:28 PM
I have a 2 1/2 yo and a 3 mo old...It's tough but so worth it... I keep my 2 1/2 involved and 'helping' so far it works she adores her baby
Good luck... And congrats!
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