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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms
There is no way anyone could convince me that ff is easier than bf! Last night I did the dishes, made dinner and nursed ds all at the same time (love my babyhawk, btw)!! Couldnt have done that with a bottle, lol!!
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by on Oct. 5, 2012 at 1:52 PM
Replies (131-140):
one_on_the_way
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:54 PM

I really wish breastfeeding had worked out for us.  I was a single mom and completely overwhelmed with it all -- I wasn't prepared to have my son not latch and becoming used to a nipple shield -- which in turn reduced my supply b/c there wasn't enough breast stimulation to produce enough milk....and all that just started the ball rolling toward 'failure'.  I pumped for four weeks but the stress of bottle feeding him my limited breastmilk supply, supplementing with formula and then pumping more while he fell back to sleep (when all I wanted to do was go to sleep, too) was just making me a wreck.  I was so sure breastfeeding was going to be our path.  I was mistaken.

I have learned a lot more about the possible challenges and a woman's and baby's physiology when it comes to breastfeeding.  I don't know if I will have another baby someday, but if I do, I am better educated and have more resources.  

All that said -- I can't imagine feeding my baby as strictly 'bonding time' while also having another child to tend to.  I can completely understand doing whatever you can to multi-task when it makes life easier to do so.  I think you and I agree that 'propping bottles' and 'breastfeeding while doing the dishes' should be exceptions.  I do feel sad that some bottle feeding mothers miss out on the bonding time as soon as their baby can hold the bottle.  Or mothers who rely on the bottle to put their baby to sleep alone in the crib.  That sets them up for a long path of weening .... not to mention the missed special moments that go along with slowing down and focusing on feeding a baby.  :o)

Quoting Autumn355:

Most of the time I am sitting with ds and nusring, it was the first time that I was able to multi-task and nurse and I was super excited about it. It made me think of moms who say ff is easier so I thought I would point out how bf can be made easier.

I practiced at home that night and since have nursed ds2 like that at the pumpkin patch and was able to spend time with and keep up with ds1 without everyone having to sit down and wait since dh wasnt there because we just adopted a new dog so he stayed home. Speaking of I nursed ds like that while we were at the spca adopting the dog. It also did it like that at dh's company bbq and was able to keep an eye on ds1.

Now the majority of the time I do sit and nurse and bond. Usually ds1 sits in the chair with us and we all bond.



Quoting one_on_the_way:

I agree...I think it should have been said "most mothers I know".

Also, as a formula feeding mother who seriously valued that feeding time = bonding time....it was never my goal to multi-task while my baby fed.  So, the fact the OP said she could do the dishes and make dinner while her baby breastfed, it isn't something that would have been my choice (breastfeeding or bottle feeding).  I can understand that it is necessary for some mothers to find ways to get the most done (especially mothers of more than one child).  For me, I wanted eye to eye contact with my son while he drank his bottle.  He always took his little hand and ran it through my hair while he ate and would just look at me.  To this day, he still likes to run his fingers through my hair when we cuddle and he is feeling content and safe.  


Quoting TigressLily:

I know some women do that, but in my lifetime, I've never seen anyone do it. So the idea that "most" women might better be phrased as "most women I know," since neither you nor I know the statistics of that situation. I am having to FF my DD now, she refused to BF at 4 months, but I have never propped up a bottle with her no matter what. And some women that "breastfeed" are actually pumping into a bottle and giving them the bottle.... so they could prop it up just the same as FF.

Quoting mama2gg:

Sadly MOST women don't hold their babies when ff they just prop bottle and go about the day



None of my friends bf and i never saw one of them hold baby to feed if they were doing something it was make bottle, pillow, prop on with whatver





fullxbusymom
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:55 PM
Well my oldest wouldn't bf he was very sick when he was born they gave him a bottle and there was no turning back he refused anything but a bottle from that point on.

My second I bf for 12wks but then needed to return back to work so he had to switch to formula (things were very different 14yrs ago).

My 3rd I bf for 4wks but he had such a powerful suck that he made me crack and bleed to the point even when I pumped I only pumped blood. I had all the support and everyone checked him he was latched correctly but there was no way to control how hard he sucked. So I 100% pumped for 4wks but then my milk slowly dried up as the pumping just wasn't enough.

None not a one has ever be sickly more clingy and the first 3 are now 15, 14 & 6yrs old. Nope not a thought, by the way my thought was simply survival and I did what was best to do that for us.


Quoting Kathy489:

Just curious, but did you ever think about your baby's long-term physical and emotional health, or just what was more convenient for you at the time? Speaking long term, children tend to be more sick more often and clingy later in childhood if they lacked nursing when they were younger. So, the time you saved when they were younger has to be made up later when they are sick and/or clingy. Not saying yours are. Just a thought.


Quoting fullxbusymom:

It is a million times easier to FF than BF. I have done both and I got to tell ya, being strapped down every time my 7mo old wants to nurse when you have 3 other kids is horrible. If formula wasn't so expensive I would have formula fed a million times over than have ever breastfed. It is literally one of the hardest most draining things I have ever done as a mother and I don't necessarily think it was worth it.

Put 2 scoops of formula in a bottle, turn the tap on shake and by 7 mo's heck by 5mo's they were completely holding the bottle 100% on their own. Way, Way, Way easier. When we went out I simply turned the tap on hot put some hot water in a bottle. Threw it in the bag and had some premeasured formula that I could dump in it, shake and hand it to them. vs. Bf'ing where you have to find a spot to sit and be all discreet, and then miss half of the fun with the rest of your family because you had to feed the baby.

Oh I don't baby wear I am uncomfortable, slam the babies head off everything, my body aches. Nope can't do it.


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gdiamante
by Group Mod - Gina on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:56 PM
2 moms liked this

Or you haven't been made aware or found information about the possibility of lactating.

My mother didn't lactate after adopting me. No one talked about that in the early 1960s. And know what? Very few people talk about it now!

At LEAST twice a week, I see women here on CafeMom claiming "it's too late for me" because they didn't know any better. No one has told them that they can. When they read that it's possible, it's like telling someone that there IS life on other planets... they are stunned, shocked and amazed!

If someone hasn't found that information, then they are somehow at fault?

No. Sorry. Not ONE BIT OF IT. Not wanting to breastfeed or not wanting to has NOTHING to do with wanting to be a mom.

If you want to find someone to blame, it comes back to a system of education that doesn't teach our adolescent girls AND boys about this normal function of the body and about the miraculous ways it works. Yep, including the concept of relactation. The function and care of the whole human body should be a required subject with NO opt-out; it's merely biology and there are no morals to biology.

Quoting XVAmomma:

If you can't make yourself lactate after adopting then it isn't lack of desire; you belong to the 1% that can't... So as I said you fall in the need be category. I have no problem with ff for babies that can't lactate. My problem is with the momma who choose ff over bf. If you as a mom don't want the whole thing then you really don't want it.
mjande4
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:56 PM
Quoting XVAmomma:

Unbelievable! You just compared a child to a load of laundry. You really are a sanctimonious piece of work! I challenge you to go to the local high school. Meet with the top twenty students. They, by the way, will all have full ride scholarships to major universities and will be the leaders academically, athletically, and in performing arts. Line them up and I guarantee that you will have NO idea how they were fed as an infant. Yet, their parents have done the very BEST job possible raising those kids to become productive citizens in society.
fullxbusymom
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:57 PM
No it doesn't and no one here does and even my pediatrician knew that. My kids all are safe and healthy so are every one of my 20yrs worth of daycare kids that everyone was done the same way by myself and their parents. Feel free to get off your high horse now.

Quoting MonicaV1982:

congratulations for improperly mixing formula. The water must be boiled to kill off all the bacteria and viruses living in the powdered formula since IT CAN'T BE STERILIZED.


Quoting fullxbusymom:

It is a million times easier to FF than BF. I have done both and I got to tell ya, being strapped down every time my 7mo old wants to nurse when you have 3 other kids is horrible. If formula wasn't so expensive I would have formula fed a million times over than have ever breastfed. It is literally one of the hardest most draining things I have ever done as a mother and I don't necessarily think it was worth it.



Put 2 scoops of formula in a bottle, turn the tap on shake and by 7 mo's heck by 5mo's they were completely holding the bottle 100% on their own. Way, Way, Way easier. When we went out I simply turned the tap on hot put some hot water in a bottle. Threw it in the bag and had some premeasured formula that I could dump in it, shake and hand it to them. vs. Bf'ing where you have to find a spot to sit and be all discreet, and then miss half of the fun with the rest of your family because you had to feed the baby.



Oh I don't baby wear I am uncomfortable, slam the babies head off everything, my body aches. Nope can't do it.


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paknari
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:57 PM
Lol. Maybe it's just me. If I'm not propping my boob I feel like my dd is suffocating. So I sit there looking like I'm doing a breast exam. Also, because of daycare I still get the joy of cleaning and preparing bottles even though inam breastfeeding!


Quoting justone_jen:

My cup size is a G. I've never exposed myself in the seven months I've been breastfeeding.



Breastfeeding is easier for me. I hate cleaning the bottles she uses while I'm working. It's a huge pain in the ass. I wouldn't want to deal with it any more than I have to.



I only have to take diapers, wipes and an extra outfit when we go out. I don't have to wake up and make bottles in the middle of the night because she just latches when she's hungry. I don't have to go somewhere to buy her food/formula. Her milk is free.



The health benefits are why I breastfeed, but in my opinion, it is much more convenient. If you think formula feeding is easier, that's fine. I just wanted to point out that large breasts don't make it impossible to nurse in public. :)




Quoting paknari:

Unless I use my other hand to hold my breast up my dd can't bresthe. I'm sure that I could stand and expose myself to everyone around but I do plan on doing that! :-)






Quoting celestegood:

I have ddd breasts and bf on the go. You have to learn how to do it but it certainly is possible.







Quoting paknari:

I'm going to breastfeed this time but formula feeding is easier. It's not painful and for Someone with DD breasts I can't walk around feeding my child. I have to sit and hold my boob with both hands and use a bobby pillow to situate baby. I never propped the bottle but it is still a pai. In the ass to bf. if it wasn't for the health benefits I would never bf.


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fullxbusymom
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 9:59 PM
Congrats mine is 7mo's and I still have to sit every single time to nurse.

Quoting mjimaging:

I have done both as well and I wouldn't trade bfing for anything. I didn't miss anything by bfing. I just continued on about my way. I didn't baby wear at first. I just carried him. I used nursing tops and I participated in everything just the same as the family. When he was little it was nice to sit and relax while he was nursing. When he was older I just learned to do it on the go and not look back.




Quoting fullxbusymom:

It is a million times easier to FF than BF. I have done both and I got to tell ya, being strapped down every time my 7mo old wants to nurse when you have 3 other kids is horrible. If formula wasn't so expensive I would have formula fed a million times over than have ever breastfed. It is literally one of the hardest most draining things I have ever done as a mother and I don't necessarily think it was worth it.





Put 2 scoops of formula in a bottle, turn the tap on shake and by 7 mo's heck by 5mo's they were completely holding the bottle 100% on their own. Way, Way, Way easier. When we went out I simply turned the tap on hot put some hot water in a bottle. Threw it in the bag and had some premeasured formula that I could dump in it, shake and hand it to them. vs. Bf'ing where you have to find a spot to sit and be all discreet, and then miss half of the fun with the rest of your family because you had to feed the baby.





Oh I don't baby wear I am uncomfortable, slam the babies head off everything, my body aches. Nope can't do it.

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XVAmomma
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 10:08 PM
Oh dear lord! Looks like I stepped in someones toe nails. Call me a bitch all you want, that wont keep me awake at night.

BF is part of being a mom so if you want to be a mom stands to reason you want to BF.

Bitch me? Yeah maybe I am a Bitch...still you have not stated why my opinion makes me a bitch? You are just saying I am because you don't agree with me...so if you agree then I'm not a bitch?



Quoting :


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tabi_cat1023
by Group Mod - Tabitha on Oct. 7, 2012 at 10:14 PM
2 moms liked this

WHO recommends boiling the water, powdered infant formula is not sterile and can contain viruses and bacteria it is particularly dangerous for preemies and babies with low immune systems.  It SHOULD be boiled, doesnt have to be but SHOULD as far as safety.

Just because your kids are fine and daycares did it doesnt make it safe.  How many daycares dont usae carseats on their vans when they pick up afterschool? TONS. DOes that make it safe? nope

Quoting fullxbusymom:

No it doesn't and no one here does and even my pediatrician knew that. My kids all are safe and healthy so are every one of my 20yrs worth of daycare kids that everyone was done the same way by myself and their parents. Feel free to get off your high horse now.

Quoting MonicaV1982:

congratulations for improperly mixing formula. The water must be boiled to kill off all the bacteria and viruses living in the powdered formula since IT CAN'T BE STERILIZED.


Quoting fullxbusymom:

It is a million times easier to FF than BF. I have done both and I got to tell ya, being strapped down every time my 7mo old wants to nurse when you have 3 other kids is horrible. If formula wasn't so expensive I would have formula fed a million times over than have ever breastfed. It is literally one of the hardest most draining things I have ever done as a mother and I don't necessarily think it was worth it.



Put 2 scoops of formula in a bottle, turn the tap on shake and by 7 mo's heck by 5mo's they were completely holding the bottle 100% on their own. Way, Way, Way easier. When we went out I simply turned the tap on hot put some hot water in a bottle. Threw it in the bag and had some premeasured formula that I could dump in it, shake and hand it to them. vs. Bf'ing where you have to find a spot to sit and be all discreet, and then miss half of the fun with the rest of your family because you had to feed the baby.



Oh I don't baby wear I am uncomfortable, slam the babies head off everything, my body aches. Nope can't do it.



XVAmomma
by on Oct. 7, 2012 at 10:23 PM
1 mom liked this
We can agree to disagree.

But BF is so much more than breast to baby's mouth. You loose so much with FF.

And you can be a good mother and still not want to be a mother. That is call being responsible. Wanting something is wanting everything that goes with it or you don't really want it.


Quoting tth328:

Both ff and bf have their difficulties and either one should outweigh the another in effort. Mothers who want to ff for whatever reason shouldn't be damn as not wanting to be a mom simple because of one decision. People who don't want to be moms are people who abuse, neglect, murder their own child(ren), etc etc.




Quoting XVAmomma:

Yes! It is easier to haul all that around, clean and sterilized all of it, wait in line to buy formula and then deal with doctors, emergency rooms and all that jazz! Yeah, If you say so!





To me bottle feed is unnatural and should be dealt only in need be cases. Mom has to go to work (my situation/I still pump no formula for my baby) or mom dies or mom has no milk bank and had an emergency (real not I am so frustated I need a day SPA emergency) or in the worst case mom/baby are in the catastrophe 1% that really can't nurse.





I HONESTLY BELIEVE THAT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO NURSE YOUR YOUNGS YOU REALLY DON'T WANT TO BE A MOTHER.







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