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Discouraging

Posted by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 10:37 AM
  • 13 Replies

 

Its so discouraging... My son is 2 months old and 10lbs 4oz and 23inches long. The doc basically said he should weigh more. He's not eating enough... I work full time and have to pump twice a day and on a good day i can pump 3 1/2 to 4oz but i'm struggling to get that much and he is suppose to be eating 4oz every 2-3 hrs. It stresses me out which i know doesn't help the process, but i want so badly to do good for my son and give him what he needs. I just dont know what else to do. I just pumped and only got 2 oz, it makes no sense to me, supply and demand my ass. I feel like this is my purpose in life, i've become a milk cow,... and its not enough!

Sorry just needed to vent maybe it will help. Anyone else have this problem and found a solution. Or just wants to vent please join in!

by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 10:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
maggiemom2000
by Ruby Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:21 AM

That sounds pretty big for a 2 month old! What was his birth weight?

This sounds like a doctor problem, not a baby problem!

2 ounces is high average pumping output!

He is actually supposed to be eating 2-3.75 ounces every 2-3 hours.

Check out the info here http://thebreastfeedingmother.blogspot.com/2012/07/returning-to-work-breastfeeding-mothers.html

How much milk will my baby need while I’m away?

Breastfed babies need, on average, 24 to 32 ounces of milk per day (Kent et al., 2006). If you spread that amount over a full day it equals 1-1.25 ounces per hour. With that information in mind, plan on leaving about 1-1.25 ounces of milk for each hour of separation. Most breastfed babies need no more than 2-4 ounces at each feeding (Kent et al., 2006). Breastfed babies need less milk than formula-fed babies do, and unlike with formula, the amount of breastmilk your baby needs does not increase as he grows bigger. When you return to work, your baby will need only a portion of this daily amount of milk from the care provider, because he will still be getting much of it by breastfeeding during the hours of the day and night when you are together.


Offering smaller bottles, of no more than 2-4 ounces, means there is a smaller chance that your baby will not finish his bottle and leave milk that must be thrown away by licensed daycares. 


How many times do I need to express milk at work?

How many times you pump at work will depend on a few factors: how long you are away from baby, how well you respond to milk-expression, and your work situation. Many working moms plan to pump milk at least as often as every 3 hours. If you are becoming engorged between pumping times, you may need to remove milk more frequently. Every mother has her own “magic number” and will differ in how frequently she needs to express her milk to both maintain milk production and provide enough expressed milk for her baby. Try to remove milk as often as it takes to collect enough for your next work day.


What if I can’t stop to pump as frequently as I would like?

When it is challenging to find enough time to pump your milk, here are some time-saving options:

  • Breastmilk can be kept at room temperature for 6-8 hours (ABM, 2004). With this guideline in mind, you do not need to take time to wash out your pump parts after every use. Keep your pump parts and bottles of milk in a cool place, and cover them with a cool towel; a small cooler or insulated lunch pack is another option.
  • Some mothers place all of their pump parts in the refrigerator along with their bottles of expressed milk each time they pump. At the end of the day, they take all of the parts home to wash.
  • Consider arranging your schedule so that you can arrive at work 15 minutes before you need to “clock in” and pump before you start work. 
  • If you don’t have enough time to completely drain your breasts, it is still valuable to stop and express some milk, even if it you only have 5 minutes.
  • If expressing in your car could help you save some time, consider purchasing a car adapter for your pump and a hands-free pumping bra (or you can make your own) so that you can pump with your hands free. For your safety, we recommend that you do not express milk while driving.
  • If you are mobile during your work hours, a cooler for your milk will help preserve your milk at a lower temperature, and you can save time by expressing milk whenever you have an opportunity.


How should I store the milk I pump at work? Do I put it all in the freezer?

In order for your baby to get the most anti-infective properties from your milk, it is best to offer it fresh whenever possible. Freezing has been found to denature some of the antibodies and kill some of the living cells in milk (Orlando, 2006; Buckley & Charles, 2006). Whether fresh or frozen, your milk provides all the nutrition your baby needs, and you can count on your milk to support your baby in all areas of growth and development.

Here is a schedule many working mothers recommend for using frozen milk. With this system, your baby gets more fresh milk and therefore the best possible nutrition and immune factors to protect him from illness:

  • Pump on Monday; give this milk to your babysitter to use on Tuesday.
  • Pump on Tuesday; use this milk on Wednesday and so on until Friday.
  • Pump on Friday, label with the date, and freeze this milk; put it in the back of the freezer.
  • Use the oldest milk in the freezer for Monday.
  • Use your freezer stash only when you have an unusual need for extra milk, for example, when your baby is going through a growth spurt or you accidentally spill all of your freshly-pumped milk.
This system prevents the frozen milk from getting too old and needing to be thrown out. Another option would be to refrigerate Friday’s milk over the weekend and let your babysitter use it on Monday. This practice would preserve more of the antibodies in Friday’s milk but would not use up your frozen milk before it goes out of date.


What if my baby’s caregiver says my baby needs more milk?

With bottle-feeding, there can be a tendency for the person feeding to encourage the baby to finish the bottle. Milk flows easily from a bottle nipple, even when the baby is not actively sucking, and the faster flow can cause a baby to continue feeding after he is full. Caregivers may believe that a baby needs more milk than he actually does, and many childcare workers are accustomed to the larger amounts of formula they feed many babies. Make sure that your caregiver has the correct information about how much breastmilk a baby needs and understands the difference between bottle-feeding breastmilk and formula. 

You can offer some tips to your baby’s caregiver on how to bottle feed in a way that supports breastfeeding:
  • Use a slow-flow soft bottle nipple that has a wide base and a shorter, round nipple (not the flatter, orthodontic kind).
  • Start by resting the tip of the nipple on the baby's upper lip and allow him to take it into his mouth himself, as if he were nursing.
  • Keep the bottle only slightly tilted, with the baby in a more upright position, so he has to work to get the milk out. If you hold the bottle straight down, the milk will come out too fast, and he may feel overwhelmed by the flow (Kassing, 2002).

What if I’m not expressing enough milk?

Here are some tips to increase the amount of milk you are expressing:
  • Go back to the basics of learning how to express your milk.
  • Relax. Take a few deep breaths and get comfortable before you begin expressing your milk.
  • Avoid watching the bottles to see how much milk is coming out. Instead, focus on your baby, listen to music, or try some relaxation methods. Many mothers find that watching how much milk is coming out reduces the amount they are able to express. Try covering the bottles with a cloth or towel, so they are not visible. There is evidence that music can be soothing to mothers while they are pumping and improve milk-removal. Music-based practices have been shown to encourage better milk production in mothers who have babies in the nicu (Keith, D.R. et al., 2012).
  • Add another breastfeeding session, especially if your baby is sleeping 5 or more hours in a row at night. 
  • If you are unable to express more frequently at work, another option is to express milk at home first thing in the morning.
  • Try more frequent, shorter sessions of expressing milk. Many mothers have said that several 20-minute sessions will yield more total milk than a couple of 30 minute sessions.
  • Send what you are able to express. Nurse at drop-off and pick-up to decrease the total amount of milk needed while you are separated. Remember that your baby has 24 hours in the day to get all of the milk he needs. If he does not get enough in the time you are apart, he can nurse more when you are together in order to get the total amount he needs.
  • If you are using a pump, check its condition. Some pumps need parts replaced frequently to maintain full suction.
  • Rule out any health-related complications to milk production with your health-care team; there are many reasons that mothers experience a dip in supply.
  • Try “hands on pumping” when you are expressing milk to empty the breast.
  • Use some gentle massage before you express: starting in the armpit and work toward the nipple in gentle, circular motions. 
  • Update the pictures of your baby that you are using when you are expressing. Bring some worn baby pajamas and try smelling them to help you mentally bring your baby into the room with you. Some mothers have said that recordings of their babies are also helpful. One mother reports that creating a sound file of her baby’s sounds and favorite lullabies together was most effective for her.
maggiemom2000
by Ruby Member on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:22 AM

More info for you (I'll bet that when you look at this info you'll realize your baby's weight gain is fine!):

http://kellymom.com/bf/normal/weight-gain/

Baby’s AgeAverage Weight Gain 1Average Weight Gain 2,3
0-4 months5.5 – 8.5 ounces per week5 – 7 ounces per week †
4-6 months3.25 – 4.5 ounces per week4 – 5 ounces per week
6-12 months1.75 – 2.75 ounces per week ‡2 – 4 ounces per week
[click here to see tables in Metric Units]† It is acceptable for some babies to gain 4-5 ounces per week.‡ The average breastfed baby doubles birth weight by 3-4 months. By one year, the typical breastfed baby will weigh about 2 1/2 – 3 times birth weight. 1Sources:

  1. World Health Organization Child Growth Standards, 2006. Available at: http://www.who.int/childgrowth/en/. To figure average weight gain, we used the weight-per-age percentile charts for birth – 5 years. The range is a combination of boys and girls 5% to 95%, rounded to the nearest quarter-ounce. Click here for more details on calculations [PDF file].
  2. Riordan J. Breastfeeding and Human Lactation, 3rd ed. Boston: Jones and Bartlett, 2005, p. 103, 512-513.
  3. Mohrbacher N and Stock J. The Breastfeeding Answer Book, Third Revised ed. Schaumburg, Illinois: La Leche League International, 2003, p. 148-149.

 

Baby’s AgeAvg. Length IncreaseAvg. Head Circumference Increase
0-6 months1 inch per month1/2 inch per month
6-12 months †1/2 inch per month1/4 inch per month
[click here to see tables in Metric Units]† By one year, the typical breastfed baby will increase birth length by 50% and head circumference by 33%.Source: Mohrbacher N and Stock J. The Breastfeeding Answer Book, Third Revised ed. Schaumburg, Illinois: La Leche League International, 2003, p. 148-149.

 

 

See also the Infant growth calculators and breastfed baby growth charts @ 

 

A few things to keep in mind when evaluating weight gain

A 5-7% weight loss during the first 3-4 days after birth is normal. A 10% weight loss is sometimes considered normal, but this amount of weight loss is a sign that the breastfeeding needs to be evaluated. It’s a good idea to have a routine weight check at 5 days (baby should be gaining rather than losing weight by day 5), so that any developing problems can be caught and remedied early.

Baby should regain birth weight by 10 days to 2 weeks. If your baby lost a good bit of weight in the early days, or if your baby is sick or premature, it may take longer to regain birth weight. If baby does not regain birth weight by two weeks, this is a sign that the breastfeeding needs to be evaluated.

Always figure weight gain from the lowest point rather than from baby’s birth weight.

Baby needs to be weighed on the same scale with the same amount of clothing (preferably naked) each time to get an accurate picture of weight gain. Different scales can give very different readings (I’ve personally seen a difference of a pound in two different scales); clothing or diapers can vary in weight and throw the numbers off. The scale should be zeroed before weighing, and baby should be centered on the scale tray. It’s never a bad idea to do a second measurement (it should be close to the first) and then use an average of the two measurements. If your baby is very active or distressed, don’t expect to get an accurate measurement. Babies grow in spurts rather than at a steady rate – to keep from needless worrying, it’s generally best to weigh baby no more often than once a week.

die4u
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:26 AM

 He was 7lbs 7oz when he was born his 2 week check up he was 8lbs 4oz then he got an ear infection and they weighed him he was 10lbs and that was 6 weeks i think.

Quoting maggiemom2000:

That sounds pretty big for a 2 month old! What was his birth weight?

This sounds like a doctor problem, not a baby problem!

2 ounces is high average pumping output!

He is actually supposed to be eating 2-3.75 ounces every 2-3 hours.

Check out the info here http://thebreastfeedingmother.blogspot.com/2012/07/returning-to-work-breastfeeding-mothers.html

How much milk will my baby need while I’m away?

Breastfed babies need, on average, 24 to 32 ounces of milk per day (Kent et al., 2006). If you spread that amount over a full day it equals 1-1.25 ounces per hour. With that information in mind, plan on leaving about 1-1.25 ounces of milk for each hour of separation. Most breastfed babies need no more than 2-4 ounces at each feeding (Kent et al., 2006). Breastfed babies need less milk than formula-fed babies do, and unlike with formula, the amount of breastmilk your baby needs does not increase as he grows bigger. When you return to work, your baby will need only a portion of this daily amount of milk from the care provider, because he will still be getting much of it by breastfeeding during the hours of the day and night when you are together.


Offering smaller bottles, of no more than 2-4 ounces, means there is a smaller chance that your baby will not finish his bottle and leave milk that must be thrown away by licensed daycares. 


How many times do I need to express milk at work?

How many times you pump at work will depend on a few factors: how long you are away from baby, how well you respond to milk-expression, and your work situation. Many working moms plan to pump milk at least as often as every 3 hours. If you are becoming engorged between pumping times, you may need to remove milk more frequently. Every mother has her own “magic number” and will differ in how frequently she needs to express her milk to both maintain milk production and provide enough expressed milk for her baby. Try to remove milk as often as it takes to collect enough for your next work day.


What if I can’t stop to pump as frequently as I would like?

When it is challenging to find enough time to pump your milk, here are some time-saving options:

  • Breastmilk can be kept at room temperature for 6-8 hours (ABM, 2004). With this guideline in mind, you do not need to take time to wash out your pump parts after every use. Keep your pump parts and bottles of milk in a cool place, and cover them with a cool towel; a small cooler or insulated lunch pack is another option.
  • Some mothers place all of their pump parts in the refrigerator along with their bottles of expressed milk each time they pump. At the end of the day, they take all of the parts home to wash.
  • Consider arranging your schedule so that you can arrive at work 15 minutes before you need to “clock in” and pump before you start work. 
  • If you don’t have enough time to completely drain your breasts, it is still valuable to stop and express some milk, even if it you only have 5 minutes.
  • If expressing in your car could help you save some time, consider purchasing a car adapter for your pump and a hands-free pumping bra (or you can make your own) so that you can pump with your hands free. For your safety, we recommend that you do not express milk while driving.
  • If you are mobile during your work hours, a cooler for your milk will help preserve your milk at a lower temperature, and you can save time by expressing milk whenever you have an opportunity.


How should I store the milk I pump at work? Do I put it all in the freezer?

In order for your baby to get the most anti-infective properties from your milk, it is best to offer it fresh whenever possible. Freezing has been found to denature some of the antibodies and kill some of the living cells in milk (Orlando, 2006; Buckley & Charles, 2006). Whether fresh or frozen, your milk provides all the nutrition your baby needs, and you can count on your milk to support your baby in all areas of growth and development.

Here is a schedule many working mothers recommend for using frozen milk. With this system, your baby gets more fresh milk and therefore the best possible nutrition and immune factors to protect him from illness:

  • Pump on Monday; give this milk to your babysitter to use on Tuesday.
  • Pump on Tuesday; use this milk on Wednesday and so on until Friday.
  • Pump on Friday, label with the date, and freeze this milk; put it in the back of the freezer.
  • Use the oldest milk in the freezer for Monday.
  • Use your freezer stash only when you have an unusual need for extra milk, for example, when your baby is going through a growth spurt or you accidentally spill all of your freshly-pumped milk.
This system prevents the frozen milk from getting too old and needing to be thrown out. Another option would be to refrigerate Friday’s milk over the weekend and let your babysitter use it on Monday. This practice would preserve more of the antibodies in Friday’s milk but would not use up your frozen milk before it goes out of date.


What if my baby’s caregiver says my baby needs more milk?

With bottle-feeding, there can be a tendency for the person feeding to encourage the baby to finish the bottle. Milk flows easily from a bottle nipple, even when the baby is not actively sucking, and the faster flow can cause a baby to continue feeding after he is full. Caregivers may believe that a baby needs more milk than he actually does, and many childcare workers are accustomed to the larger amounts of formula they feed many babies. Make sure that your caregiver has the correct information about how much breastmilk a baby needs and understands the difference between bottle-feeding breastmilk and formula. 

You can offer some tips to your baby’s caregiver on how to bottle feed in a way that supports breastfeeding:
  • Use a slow-flow soft bottle nipple that has a wide base and a shorter, round nipple (not the flatter, orthodontic kind).
  • Start by resting the tip of the nipple on the baby's upper lip and allow him to take it into his mouth himself, as if he were nursing.
  • Keep the bottle only slightly tilted, with the baby in a more upright position, so he has to work to get the milk out. If you hold the bottle straight down, the milk will come out too fast, and he may feel overwhelmed by the flow (Kassing, 2002).

 

What if I’m not expressing enough milk?

Here are some tips to increase the amount of milk you are expressing:
  • Go back to the basics of learning how to express your milk.
  • Relax. Take a few deep breaths and get comfortable before you begin expressing your milk.
  • Avoid watching the bottles to see how much milk is coming out. Instead, focus on your baby, listen to music, or try some relaxation methods. Many mothers find that watching how much milk is coming out reduces the amount they are able to express. Try covering the bottles with a cloth or towel, so they are not visible. There is evidence that music can be soothing to mothers while they are pumping and improve milk-removal. Music-based practices have been shown to encourage better milk production in mothers who have babies in the nicu (Keith, D.R. et al., 2012).
  • Add another breastfeeding session, especially if your baby is sleeping 5 or more hours in a row at night. 
  • If you are unable to express more frequently at work, another option is to express milk at home first thing in the morning.
  • Try more frequent, shorter sessions of expressing milk. Many mothers have said that several 20-minute sessions will yield more total milk than a couple of 30 minute sessions.
  • Send what you are able to express. Nurse at drop-off and pick-up to decrease the total amount of milk needed while you are separated. Remember that your baby has 24 hours in the day to get all of the milk he needs. If he does not get enough in the time you are apart, he can nurse more when you are together in order to get the total amount he needs.
  • If you are using a pump, check its condition. Some pumps need parts replaced frequently to maintain full suction.
  • Rule out any health-related complications to milk production with your health-care team; there are many reasons that mothers experience a dip in supply.
  • Try “hands on pumping” when you are expressing milk to empty the breast.
  • Use some gentle massage before you express: starting in the armpit and work toward the nipple in gentle, circular motions. 
  • Update the pictures of your baby that you are using when you are expressing. Bring some worn baby pajamas and try smelling them to help you mentally bring your baby into the room with you. Some mothers have said that recordings of their babies are also helpful. One mother reports that creating a sound file of her baby’s sounds and favorite lullabies together was most effective for her.

 

Megadot
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:28 AM

My 3 month old is 11lbs and docs say she is growing just fine. I wouldnt worry about it as long as he is putting out the right amount of diapers and is satisfied when he eats. Doc are smart but they dont know everything. You are doing great Momma good luck!! :)

die4u
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:29 AM

 oh and he was 21inches long at birth, so he was long.

mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:29 AM
He's almost 3 pounds over birth weight at 2 months? Considering the goal is an average of a pound a month, I'd say you've got an overachiever there! He's certainly not low weight or slow gain!
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
die4u
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:34 AM

 I feed him in the am around 6:30 -7:00 and he has a bottle when i'm gone between 8-12 i come home for lunch and breatfeed. so i pump at 9:30 and then again at 2:30 then breastfeed when i'm at home.

die4u
by on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:35 AM
Thank you guys for the advise and the comparison in age and weight makes me feel better.
mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:37 AM
Have you tried pumping before the baby first wakes up and taking advantage of the higher morning output? Then nurse when he wakes up, even if its s half hour later. Or pump one side while he nurses on the other that first morning session?
Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
mamabens
by Miranda on Jan. 11, 2013 at 11:42 AM

You  have a dr problem not a baby weight problem. THis dr is not used to bf babies & is giving you info for formula fed babies. *I* would fire the dr & find a new one or you could ignore & smile & nod. You're doing great.

 BabyFruit Ticker


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