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Is Infant Feeding Really a Choice?

Posted by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 9:38 AM
  • 25 Replies
3 moms liked this

Is Infant Feeding Really a Choice?

Many of us talk about breast or bottle as a choice.  I used to think that way, too.  But I’m beginning to see it differently. 

On November 1, I had the privilege of speaking to a group of amazing and inspiring British women who work with breastfeeding mothers as peer counselors.  The night before this talk in West Bromwich, England I stayed with Anne, one of the Training Coordinators of La Leche League of Great Britain’s Peer Counsellor Programme (LLLGB/PCP). 

Anne told me a story I will never forget.  It began when Anne’s son’s partner, Kelly, moved into her home while pregnant with her second child.  Kelly became involved with Anne’s son during this pregnancy, so her unborn baby was not Anne’s biological grandchild. 

Kelly had bottle-fed her first child and was planning to do the same again.  In preparation, she bought a sterilizer and an array of feeding bottles, which one day Anne came home to find covering her kitchen counter.  Knowing that many young mothers would be coming there for breastfeeding help, she asked Kelly to keep her purchases on a shelf out of view.  Anne was concerned about giving one message with her words and another with the obvious bottle-feeding paraphernalia.  Kelly did not really understand Anne’s concern (in Kelly’s mind babies, bottles, and sterilizers all just went together), but she agreed. 

After her baby was born, surprise!  Kelly gave birth in a Baby-Friendly hospital where after delivery all newborns are placed skin-to-skin with their mothers.  When this happened, Kelly’s baby crawled up and attached to her breast.  Kelly responded, “Well, I guess she’s breastfeeding after all.”  She went on to exclusively breastfeed and nursed her for several years.  No doubt her exposure to Anne and the breastfeeding mothers she met helped Kelly make breastfeeding a reality. 

When the baby was about a week old, Kelly said to Anne, “Why don’t they tell you about breastfeeding?  It’s easy, isn’t it?  If I’d known that, I would’ve done it before.”  She had only ever thought of breastfeeding as hard work and a source of problems.  Then Anne asked Kelly something Nancy illustrating a concept with a balloon in West Bromwich, Englandshe’d been wondering for a while: “Why did you choose to formula feed your first baby?”  Kelly’s response startled her: “I didn’t choose.  I just did what I thought you did to feed babies.  It was not a choice as such.  I didn’t think of it that way.” 

Kelly had only ever seen babies bottle-fed.  She didn’t know anyone who had breastfed and she knew nothing about it.  To Kelly, feeding babies by bottle was just how it’s done.   Asking her to consider breastfeeding would have felt to her like asking her to perform surgery or argue a legal case in court.  She knew some people did those things but definitely not her. 

Anne has a special interest in how a mother’s confidence in breastfeeding builds and often asks new mothers when they really began to feel like a breastfeeding mother.  According to Anne, some mothers raised in breastfeeding families see themselves as breastfeeding mothers even before becoming pregnant and giving birth.  In Kelly’s case, it took about a week.  For others it takes a few weeks or even months of breastfeeding.  Anne has noticed that once “breastfeeding mother” becomes part of a woman’s self-image, she is unlikely to let breastfeeding problems get her way.  Some term this phenomenon “breastfeeding self-efficacy,”1 which is really just how much confidence a mother has that breastfeeding will work for her.   Not surprisingly, greater breastfeeding self-efficacy has been associated with longer duration of breastfeeding, even in cultures where fewer women breastfeed.2

What can we do to enhance mothers’ confidence in breastfeeding?  Physician Christina Smillie describes one way as “oozing confidence in the process.”  Most breastfeeding advocates do this naturally.  Showing mothers tricks that make breastfeeding easier is another. Contact with other breastfeeding mothers--either one-on-one or in support groups--is a big one.  Spending time with mothers who enjoy breastfeeding has a major impact, as does their encouragement.

The wonderful women I met in West Bromwich, England do this every day in their role as peer counselors.  It felt good to thank them personally for the important work they do.

References

1Dennis, C.-L. Theoretical underpinnings of breastfeeding confidence: A self-efficacy framework.  J Hum Lact 1999; 15(3):195-201.

2McCarter-Spaulding, D. and Gore, R.  Breastfeeding self-efficacy in women of African descent.  JOGNN 2009; 38(2):230-43.

by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 9:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Jan. 31, 2013 at 10:34 AM
5 moms liked this
Before the birth of my first child when I was 29 years old, I had only seen one woman breastfeed (under a huge blanket) and I knew my aunt was sneaking off to a back bedroom to breastfeed. My whole family teased me for wanting to breastfeed and my mom bought me a case of formula at my baby shower. I've said it over and over again, I completely owe my success to a breastfeeding moms support group at my hospital, where I went almost 3 times a week for over 6 months. The women I met there are still my best friends over 12 years later. Just having that peer group meant a lot to me. If my other friends had had babies before me, I might have just stepped in line and bottle-fed formula like they did, just like above, not really as a choice but just "because that's what you do". Instead I logged over 100 months of breastfeeding added up across 4 babies.



I'm glad my kids have grown to see breastfeeding as "just what you do". Every time a mom breastfeeds in the open and anyone notices her, from her own family to strangers, it becomes a little more "what you do". Even those who are horrified by breastfeeding must be less and less shocked the more often they run into it.
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newmom121812
by Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 10:52 AM
No one in my family breast fed but I decided to do it from the start. I hate it ill make it a year max but I think only til 8 months and I'm glad I don't want more kids
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Momsthename0609
by Bronze Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this
I was never exposed to breastfeeding, when I had my first though I knew that it was something I wanted to do. It just seemed so natural to me.
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outstandingLove
by Cheri on Jan. 31, 2013 at 10:54 PM

I never saw breastfeeding when i was a child (not that i remember). But i knew that my mom breastfed all 4 of her children with a goal of making it to 6 months (She only met her goal once, but we were all breastfed between 4-7 months).

Before i had my baby girl, i did see some strangers out and about breastfeeding, but most of them used a cover.


catholicmamamia
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:19 PM

In my family breastfeeding is a natural part of mothering, with artificial baby milk being a last resort when there is a true medical need and/or there are no other options. 


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Amberleigh81
by Silver Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:43 PM
My mom talked about "failing" so much to me as a child and as an adult that I decided I would "try" for her, as much for me. My mom mourns not breastfeeding my little sister more than 2 weeks (FTT... grr) and my sister will be 24 this year.

I never thought about starting with formula. I was AFRAID to fail, but I was stubborn to push through difficulties at the beginning. Now I am a lactivist!
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MonicaV1982
by on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:43 PM

Despite isolated cases where moms aren't influenced by formula feeding in their community, family, etc. it is still an important factor to consider in BF rates.

mymanben
by Member on Jan. 31, 2013 at 11:54 PM
I couldn't breast feed :( but if I have another kid, I will try again.
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MonicaV1982
by on Feb. 1, 2013 at 12:15 AM

Can I ask why you couldn't BF? Many times moms think they can't when they get trapped in one of the many booby traps. I ask so that we can help you be successful next time. :) Knowledge = Power. :)



Quoting mymanben:

I couldn't breast feed :( but if I have another kid, I will try again.



mymanben
by Member on Feb. 1, 2013 at 12:20 AM
1 mom liked this
He broke out in a rash and would throw up every time he had breast milk :( the second I gave him a lactose free formula he got well.


Quoting MonicaV1982:

Can I ask why you couldn't BF? Many times moms think they can't when they get trapped in one of the many booby traps. I ask so that we can help you be successful next time. :) Knowledge = Power. :)




Quoting mymanben:

I couldn't breast feed :( but if I have another kid, I will try again.





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