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How do I deal with family hating on me breastfeeding my 13 month old?

Posted by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:46 PM
  • 32 Replies

Everyone was CRAZY supportive about me breastfeeding my daughter until she was a year old. And I had planned on weaning her right after her first bday, but she screamed and was miserable and i was upset and sore.

I realised i was only weaning her because everyone I know thinks its "gross" and "she is too old" to continue breastfeeding.

After I realised that i talked to my husband. He told me he wanted me to continue to breastfeed but he didnt say anything before because it was up to me to decide. So with the 3 of us on board we are continuing to breastfeed. But it sucks that i dont have the support i used to. in fact every one is anti-supportive (is that a word?) i dont see how its gross  to breastfeed my daughter still, but i cant seem to make them understand.

i dont want the "well thats their problem" or "as long as you 3 are for it." comments. Its important to me to get them to come around. Or at least to give it my best shot

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Precious333
by Group Mod-Julia on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:55 PM
Accidently deleted my post :( i would surrond myself withbsupportive bfeding mommies irl. Www.llli.org has monthlybmeetings where.you can meet other mommies.
My mil is similar to your family. She doesnt get it. I am nursing toddler number three, hes 29 months and she is finally becoming a bi more respectful but did ask me when i was weaning.i told her i still nurse with limits and im fine with that. That was the end of.it.
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risaspieces
by Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:58 PM
I'm curious too, my mil is on me to change ds to formula because 6 weeks ( yes weeks) is too old to be breast fed. -_- I ignore it but its be nice to get her on board, dh tries but he's only home 42 hours a week.
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parentalrights1
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:04 PM
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They are not going to. Don't waste your time. You literally have to make the concious decision to not give a fuck.

Are they the type to be receptive to research and logic or the type to be like "eww boobies are sexual!" no matter what you say?

Sure you COULD try arming yourself with knowledge and good comebacks, but odds are, they're just ignorant and have no interest in learning.

You could try asking them if it makes any sense to them that people are more comfortable with toddlers drinking a farm animals breastmilk than milk that is made for them. You could try asking them why america is one of 13 countries that even views breastfeeding as a controversial issue and oversexualizes the breasts.

Precious333
by Group Mod-Julia on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:04 PM
Two things you can handle.it.. you can give hef loads of.information, and/or you can just say, no thank you, we will.continue breastfeeding.


Quoting risaspieces:

I'm curious too, my mil is on me to change ds to formula because 6 weeks ( yes weeks) is too old to be breast fed. -_- I ignore it but its be nice to get her on board, dh tries but he's only home 42 hours a week.

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cl1998
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:07 PM
1 mom liked this

 My son just turned 14 months and i get the same thing.  Nothing i say or do however will change their minds, they are already set.  B loves to comfort himself with nursing and i dont mind making him happy ;) The only thing you may be able to say to them is that you understand their feeling but are choosing to continue nursing because that is what is best for you and your babe!

cl1998
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:09 PM

I almost want to laugh??  How do people think babies were fed before formula??  Hon if you want to nurse tell them thats what youre doing!!!  An infant is meant to nurse and mom is meant to feed them, especially when they are that little!!! 

Quoting risaspieces:

I'm curious too, my mil is on me to change ds to formula because 6 weeks ( yes weeks) is too old to be breast fed. -_- I ignore it but its be nice to get her on board, dh tries but he's only home 42 hours a week.

 

justone_jen
by Jen on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:10 PM
3 moms liked this
I don't have any desire to convince someone to agree with me. I do, however, expect respect, whether my family agrees or not.

Frankly, my family would be told to shut up and drop it. And probably with more profanity.

You'll drive yourself mad trying to make people come around. Speaking from experience, I feel much more...relaxed about my choices, now that I've come to the realization that I don't have to justify myself to anyone. I know that's not the answer you're looking for, but it's the most honest answer I have.
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justone_jen
by Jen on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:12 PM
5 moms liked this
This is how I'd handle it:

MIL: Baby needs formula. You should wean.
Me: No.

That's it.


Quoting risaspieces:

I'm curious too, my mil is on me to change ds to formula because 6 weeks ( yes weeks) is too old to be breast fed. -_- I ignore it but its be nice to get her on board, dh tries but he's only home 42 hours a week.
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abigailsmommy11
by Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:14 PM

If they have to come around for you to continue, then you're screwed. Just being honest, I had pressure from my entire family to stop breastfeeding after 6 months, no one but my Husband was supportive. You have to be able to stand up for what you want and tell them to back off. I breastfed my Dd until she weaned herself at 14.5 months. I had more than a few fights with family members over it. In the end, you have the facts on your side.

illinoismommy83
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:17 PM
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Do you need support at this point? You have an established routine and its not like DD can't have a sippy cup at Grandma's house. 

I don't think extended family knew how long I breastfed. DD2 was having family meals with the rest of us and used a cup just fine. I nursed her as long as WE wanted. No one else needs to know.

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