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Giving up on breast feeding

Posted by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:47 AM
  • 48 Replies

I had a beautiful baby girl on feb 28. I was so determined to breast feed, being it is my fifth child and my last (never breast fed my other children). My husband was my cheerleader. He is the greatest. We went to a class I paid for and took notes, brought things to help and read up on it. Well I quit last night and my husband went and purchased Similac. I cried so much last night I was hysterical again my husband my greatest supporter held me as I cried. My nipples are slit and my left one was bleeding and the baby was screaming. On top of her having severe gas. It smelled horrible. She seemed as though she was suffering and I felt I had no other alternative. All my family bottle fed, so no support there. I had one friends daughter that breast fed. They brought me a Manuel  pump over and I tried under excruciating pain to Pump milk. We got 1 ounce. The baby continued to scream. my husband called the hospital they explained to him what kind of formula to purchase. He ran to the store. While he was gone I attempted to breast feed to stop my baby from crying. She would suck and stop. She latched at the hospital. I believe the latch was wrong. That is why my breast were raw. I did skin to skin. I requested a lactation nurse, she came only after I complained that she never came, The day we were getting released. I tried to go to a class in the hospital but they gave the class at 1030am and the pediatrician came in at that exact time to discuss a lump that is on the side of the babies neck. I went the second day ( my release date march 3) I complained and cried in front of the class about the lack of support from the hospital. The nurses were no better. I feel like I was doomed from the beginning. What do you think? My friends daughter told me to go on Cafemom for support. Help 

by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 10:47 AM
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by Amanda on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:01 AM
If your nipples are bleeding and raw, it is most likely improper latch. Your. baby's mouth should cover your whole areola, not just your. nipple and her lips should be flanged out on your breast, if her lips are tucked in, insert your pinky finger between her cheek and ur nipple to break the latch and reposition until proper latch is established. As for sore nipples, purchase some lanolin nipple cream or nipple butter. I prefer medela lanolin, glides on easily and is very soothing, I don't like lansinoh lanolin, because its the consistency of toothpaste and hurts even more to rub on agitated nnipples. Also try hydrogel breast pads for relief.
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by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:13 AM
You can try a nipple shield. It allows to continue nursing while your nipples heal. Unfortunately this is the story in so many hospitals! I'm sorry you experienced this. I would buy a nipple shield (i bought mine from babies r us 2 for $5), contact an ibclc or look for a la leche league leader. You can also find videos on how to correctly latch baby on youtube. And an important thing is that if it hurts for more than the initial latch then unlatch her. Don't let her nurse until she has a good latch. Have you looked for tongue or lip ties? I started using a shield because my son is tongue tied.
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by Amanda on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:14 AM
I would give up on pumping for now as well, until at least 6 weeks , at ehich time your supply should be established, then you should pump only if absolutely necessary , like returning to work full time. If and when you do start pumping , remember it is normal output to get half an ounce to 2 ounces between both breasts combined per pump session and a breastfed baby never needs more than 3 oz per bottle..,,
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by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:15 AM
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Firstly, you always have a choice. Formula is not a better option than breastmilk and will not fix the gas problems. Fromula can create it's own world of problems. You need to ditch the formula and put the baby back to the breast or you will end up with nipple confusion and really have issues.

The gas may be caused by things you are eating. It's a good idea to cut out dairy because it may be making baby sick.

Breastfeeding shouldn't hurt, this baby is not latching correctly. You can go on youtube and look up a 'good latch' you need the baby to open WIDEE. You can also look for a Lactation COnsultant to help you with a latch, sometimes midwives will come and help with latching. You could try contacting one

Your baby is still young, this is the hard part. It's all downhill from here :) gl momma!

by Group Admin -Tabitha on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:43 AM
2 moms liked this
Sounds like latch IS wrong. Baby may have a tongue tie, that can cause latch issues and BAD gas. Baby is only a few days old and you got 1 oz??? WOW thats amazing since babies tummy is maybe 1oz now. YES I bet she took ore from that formula bottle but that stretched the tummy, its not what she needed. I want you to look up la leche league in your area and an IBCLC. IBCLC is who help with BFIng and have the training to do so. Nurses never do! Get some lanolin, a nipple shield and some help...try hard to continue nursing!!
by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:43 AM

Do you want to breastfeed? It is not too late!

Here's some info on getting a better latch:

No matter what latch and positioning look like, the true measure is in the answers to these two questions:

  1. Is it effective?
  2. Is it comfortable?

Even if latch and positioning look perfect (and, yes, even if a lactation consultant told you they were fine), pain and/or ineffective milk transfer indicate that there is a problem somewhere, and the first suspect is ineffective latch/positioning.

If baby is transferring milk and gaining weight well, and mom is not hurting, then latch and positioning are – by definition – good, even if it’s nothing like the “textbook” latch and positioning that you’ve seen in books.

“Rules and regulations have no place in the mother-baby relationship. Each mother and baby dyad is different and what works well for one mother and baby may not work well for another mother and baby. The important thing to do is to look at the mother and baby as individuals.”– Andrea Eastman, MA, CCE, IBCLC in The Mother-Baby Dance

Following are some of my favorite resources on latch and positioning:

Biological Nurturing: Laid-Back Breastfeeding from Dr. Suzanne Colson. Breastfeeding in a semi-reclined position can be very helpful for both mom and baby.

Newborn Hands: Why are they always in the way while breastfeeding? from the San Diego Breastfeeding Center

Latching handouts by Diane Wiessinger, MS, IBCLC

Breastfeeding: Off to the best start from the UK Department of Health
(Lovely latching pictures here, with simple directions.)

Deep Latch Technique from The Pump Station.
(Good latching pictures and directions.)

When Latching by Anne J. Barnes, has instructions with drawings
(The drawings and tips here are helpful.)

Latching videos by Dr. Jack Newman

Animation illustrating assymetrical latch technique by Victoria Nesterova
(Nice animation — text is in Russian.)

The Mother-Baby Dance: Positioning and Latch-On by Andrea Eastman, MA, CCE, IBCLC
(This is a longish article written for breastfeeding counselors that has some nice descriptions of latching and positioning, along with info on why some things tend to work better than others.)

Is baby latching on and sucking efficiently? How to tell from
(A useful list.)

L-A-T-C-H-E-S * Breastfeeding Assessment Tool (for the first 4 weeks) and Scoring Key by Marie Davis, RN, IBCLC
(A tool for professionals that could also be useful for moms who are wondering if breastfeeding is going fine and whether additional help is needed.)

Help for various nursing positions

Lactation yoga, or side-lying nursing without getting up to switch sides by Eva Lyford, @ 

Nursing Laying Down (step-by-step description with photos) from

Some tips on the football & cross cradle nursing positions by Kathy Kuhn, IBCLC

Some tips on nursing while lying down by Kathy Kuhn, IBCLC

More useful information

Latching: Thoughts on pushing baby’s chin down when latching @ 

Taking baby off the breast by Marie Davis, IBCLC

PDF Baby-led Latching: An “Intuitive” Approach to Learning How to Breastfeed by Mari Douma, DO, from the Michigan Breastfeeding Network Newsletter, December 2003, Volume 1, Issue 3.

PDF When the Back of the Baby’s Head is Held to Attach the Baby to the Breast by Robyn Noble DMLT, BAppSc(MedSc), IBCLC and Anne Bovey, BspThy

Breast Compression by Jack Newman, MD. The purpose of breast compression is to continue the flow of milk to the baby once the baby no longer drinks on his own, and thus keep him drinking milk. Breast compression simulates a letdown reflex and often stimulates a natural let-down reflex to occur. The technique may be useful for poor weight gain in the baby, colic in the breastfed baby, frequent feedings and/or long feedings, sore nipples in the mother, recurrent blocked ducts and/or mastitis, encouraging the baby who falls asleep quickly to continue drinking.

by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:49 AM

Thanks for all your responses. It made me cry. I am so emotional. I did not know they have nipple shields. MayBe I can try that. Since I have not breast fed will my milk dry up? I called my insurance. A lactation consultant was suppose to come to the house, I set it up through my insurance. They said someone will call but haven't heard nothing as of yet. I am using those toppie bottles that are shaped like a nipple. I do have the Madela Lanolin. I walked around all day yesterday without a shirt and lanolin. Today I put on gel covers I was given from the hospital. I took a warm shower to help the gorging. I do not drink dairy because I am lactose intolerant myself. My breast hurt too bad to put her back on, should I try a electrics pump? I did not know I would only get 2 ounces. She was still hungry after I gave her what I pumped out. I am going to look on you tube. Thank you soon much. 

by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:50 AM

Oh my the nurse just called. She will be here soon and she said the lactation nurse will be here tomorrow, but she knows about breast feeding. 

by Alicia on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:52 AM
(((HUGS))) It can be overwhelming and I'm sorry you didn't get the help you needed in the hospital. Send DH to a baby store and get nipple shields for now, use them until your nipples heal. Put some bm on them and air dry. It should take a day or 2 and they will heal. When baby latches make sure most if not all of your nipple is in the mouth and her to cry, look for her moving her lips in her sleep or looking for her hands. Are you using a paci right now? If you are stop ASAP. They tend to make latching harder and worse. Toss the formula or at the very least put it in the highest shelf in your house way in the back. You can do this momma. Try youtubing latching and see if that helps.
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by on Mar. 3, 2013 at 11:53 AM


The above advice is GOLDEN!!! If you need support come here!!!

I had ZERO support as well with my first, I come from a long line of formula too! But I came to this group a few years back and was enlightened, and these ladies REALLY helped me SUCCEED in breastfeeding!

They gave me CORRECT information, and educated me on how WRONG some doctors are when it comes to BFing advice, medications, etc!

Ask a question, need support, want to show off your nursling, COME IN HERE! We are all here to educate, support, and help! :)

proprolife.gif picture by piink-lem0nade


Happily married Mama to one angelbaby, a son born 10-19-10, and a daughter born 3-20-12

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