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Excuses for not nursing *Just a Vent*

Posted by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:35 AM
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This was all brought on my a visit to my sil's house and a brief convo I had in another group.

I find all the excuses as to why ppl couldn't bf to be ridiculous. There is the classic "my milk never came in", the frequent "my newborn wants to nurse all the time so obviously not getting enough milk", and the ever popular "my baby didn't like the taste of my milk" (WTF??). I forgot to add one of my fav excuses for not breastfeeding "It will make my boobs saggy".

My sil nursed 2 days before deciding that baby didn't know how to nurse. She had me so scared and nervous bc I desperatly wanted to bf.

I have so much more respect for ppl who say "I didn't bf bc I didn't want to". At least that way they aren't spreading misinformation to mommies to be and new mommies.

And yes I do know there are conditions on both mommy's and baby's part that are legitimate medical reasons to not bf but those cases are far and few.
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by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:35 AM
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by Bronze Member on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:43 AM
Oh yes, I hate all these excuses too.
All my friends and I had a baby in late 2011- mid 2012, those that tried breast feeding had an excuse as to why they quit and then the next put up pics of themselves on Facebook out partying.
My sil did the exact same but with baby number two she couldn't use any excuse because I called her out since I tried helping her so much the three days she tried and she admitted formula was easier because she didn't want to hold her new born to feed him and didn't want to have to take him every where with her.

There is not a single reason I can think of why a baby shouldn't get breast milk. It is ridiculous!
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by Amanda on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:48 AM
Agreed, it pisses me off. Its also the fact that a lot of mommies who use these excuses actually believe them, like not having enough milk, most people don't know how often newborns are really supposed to feed, as formula has become the norm and those are scheduled feedings and take longer to digest as baby's body wasn't designed for that kind of intake. Everyone bases their info off formula-fed babes. Its just sickening the lack of info and amount of misinformation there is regarding the only truly natural way to feed an infant. Grrrr!
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by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:53 AM
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For me " trying" isnt even a word i will use along with bf. I will bf this baby as i did my other 2, even through inverted nipples, trouble latching, crackes nipples etc ... Yes, it is frustrating at times ,esp first few weeks but if women would just make up their mind, it ends up being so much easier over time. I have 3 sisters and 5 nieces that have all bf, only one had problems that ended up causing her to stop. Her son was tongue tied at the back of his tongue and couldnt latch properly, her poor nipples were like raw meat but she still pumped for months. I agree, if you dont want to, dont ! But dont make silly excuses...
by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 9:55 AM
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It's almost like they know they didn't do best and lie so they don't look bad.
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by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:00 AM
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I had a real "conversation" with someone in mc who was telling a new mom that the reason baby was fussy when nursing was bc baby didn't like the TASTE of her milk and she needs to ff. If you think bm tastes bad, try formula. I can't even stand the smell of that stuff.

Why can't I reach through this phone and smack some ppl?
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by Member on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:03 AM
I ebf my 8 month old & its the best thing i could have done for him...if you can get through the first 2 weeks there really is no excuse unless you have a serious medical condition that prevents you from breastfeeding
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by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:06 AM
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I know you said you're just venting, but keep in mind that they're regurgitating what their doctors are telling them. Most moms assume doctors/nurses to be knowledgable and that these porfessionals will give the best, most up-to-date advice--only to have these professionals tell them exactly what you're calling ridiculous. Not all (but certainly too many) health care 'professionals' threaten to involve child services when a mom says she wants to try other options before supplementing with formula, or stopping BFing altogether. 

These moms aren't lying or making excuses--they're repeating what they're being told by their doctors, and then being harshly judged and criticized for being given bad info from what should be a reliable source. Remembering this will help you to be sympathetic with these moms instead of angry with or disappointed in them. 

I was told I wasn't making enough with my first and had to FF because I was "starving" him; had no desire at all to learn to BF with my second; and weaned my third in January after BFing for 22 months. If I'd had the support and accurate info with the first two that I had with the third, I'd probably have BF all three.

by on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:10 AM
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I think with the "not making enough" excuse, it's because new moms don't have enough information and really DO think they aren't making enough. Your breasts start regulating themselves and aren't as full and engorged around the six week growth spurt so a new mom might think those two are related and think she's but making enough. That's how I was with my first dd. I thought I wasn't making enough so I started supplementing, then my milk production started going down because I wasn't nursing as often, so I started supplementing more and before I knew it I wasn't breastfeeding at all anymore.

So yes, while it isn't a good excuse and most of the time it isn't true, a lot of moms sadly don't have enough information about breastfeeding so they just jump to formula do their babies will be "satisfied"
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by Group Admin - Stacy on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:11 AM
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It most bothers me when someone doesn't want to breastfeed because it puts a damper on their sex life, because their boobs "belong" to their husband. It disturbs me that sexy-breasts can be marketed so heavily that it overpowers a mother's drive to breastfeed.

One of my aunts told me she didn't breastfeed because she had a rough labor, IVs and medications, and she just couldn't stand to have one more thing "hooked up" to her.
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by Silver Member on Mar. 5, 2013 at 10:19 AM

I agree.  I admit I judge mothers who don't breastfeed.  I can't imagine giving your child crap in a can.  I hate the smell of formula and spit up.  I find breastfeeding just easier and better.  I type this as my 3 month old hits a growth spurt.  

I had a soccer mom tell me her son just loves his formula so much she can't imagine him liking breast milk.  

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