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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

I am in this group for advice and support when it comes to breastfeeding.   I feel that it is advice and support that is truly needed for many women who make the choice to breastfeed.  

I cannot seem to wrap my head around all of the judgement that is directed toward any woman who chooses (or is unable) to breastfeed.   

Women on here who judge those who do not breastfeed -- why?  

by on Mar. 31, 2013 at 10:52 AM
Replies (21-30):
catholicmamamia
by on Apr. 1, 2013 at 8:08 PM
1 mom liked this

Agreed, completely.. :o) 

Quoting lifeforchrist: Honestly I haven't really seen judgment on this forum, I've seen these ladies give truth and facts to help other women. ANd I've seen other women not want to listen to these facts and insist they aren't true. These women give truth for breastfeeding success, not false excuses and bad information to prevent you from breastfeeding. A lot of women feel judged when they don't get the answers they want. I see this a lot with the women I try and help in my own life. They insist I'm bashing them, and I have no idea what they're going through. There are very few reasons a woman can't breastfeed. And most reasons can be changed and fixed. That's how I see this group, a group who doesn't sugar coat the truth. They want you to be sucessful breastfeeding, but that doesn't mean they are judgmental.

 


                
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poosey08
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 9:08 PM
3 moms liked this

How can you not judge someone that doesn't want to give their children the best!

Mom2Just1
by Silver Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:42 PM
2 moms liked this

I try not to judge.  But I admit I do.  I don't understand why you would willingly choose to give your child an inferior product.  Formula is crap and the ingredients are appalling.  I also do not understand how a mother can't even make the good first big decision in their child's life with food.  

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justone_jen
by Jen on Apr. 1, 2013 at 10:55 PM
3 moms liked this
This.

And the, "I couldn't nurse," line drives me batty, because, statistically speaking, it's impossible for the amount of women who claim this to truly not be able to.

If one doesn't want to, their choice, but own it. Don't perpetuate the idea that nursing successfully is so uncommon, or out of reach.

Lastly, it's been my experience that those who claim to be bashed actually just can't take an opinion different than their own. This group exists to help women succeed with breastfeeding, not to sugar coat responses for the overly-sensitive.


Quoting audmom1218:

No judgement from me on people who CHOSE not to breastfeed, but I do heavily direct judgement to professionals who perpetuate myths who either sabotage an otherwise healthy BF relationship, or lead moms to never try because they are afraid they won't succeed.  

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Sebbiemama
by Member on Apr. 1, 2013 at 11:34 PM

Okay, the timing of this comment right after the nice one above it made me laugh. Clearly not everyone is here just to help you be sucessful at breastfeeding without being judgemental. Some people like being judgemental and they see nothing wrong with it. And CM is open to all types of women. You can't change them. Don't try. 

Quoting poosey08:

How can you not judge someone that doesn't want to give their children the best!

But not all women here judge those who do not breastfeed. I didn't sucessfully breastfeed for long with my first and you know what? He's a wonderful, healthy, happy little boy now! But I know breast milk is better than formula, so I'm here to learn how to do things better with my second. 

You can find advice and support here, but you just need to look over the heads of the haters every now and then. Lots of the folks here do seem to really want to help and I really appreciate them. But ultimately, I know these are just anonymous moms on some public chat-site. I need to research anything I learn here on my own and then make up my own mind for my own family. 

kmfn11
by on Apr. 2, 2013 at 12:18 AM
I dont judge ff mommas however I do suggest it :) My personal prefrance after not being able to bf my first lo then bf our last lo....boob is best! WIC was very encouraging I visited with a lactation specialist often and attended a few bf support groups :) WIC was very supportive but I knew by the time the baby came I would be bf.
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Sama2Mamma
by on Apr. 2, 2013 at 12:29 AM
I will be honest. If you can not breastfeed because of medical issues then no I do not judge. If you choose to ff without even trying to bf then yes I do judge. If you know its the best possible thing for your baby then why would you not want them to have it? I just hear way too many excuses of why they didnt or couldnt (when they really could) breastfeed.
To be fair I try not to judge until I know the reasons why because for some it may be medical issues and I wouldnt want to feel like an ass for jumping to conclusions.
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anxiousschk
by Bronze Member on Apr. 2, 2013 at 9:26 AM

How on earth do we know those "statistics" are reliable? 

I hear "statistically speaking" a lot as well as "the actual number of women who can't bf is LOW"  

What statistics are you reading? What studies have been done?  Who were the participants more likely to be? 

There is truly no way to know who can and can't bf, or the real number of those who can/can't.  

Guess what, I couldn't nurse my first.  My second, it's a completely different situation.  

As far as the "lastly" part:  I've seen women in here call women who ff lazy and stupid, among other things.  How is that anything less than bashing?  (I've certainly seen this in other groups as well -- I'm not trying to single this one out.) 


Quoting justone_jen:

This.

And the, "I couldn't nurse," line drives me batty, because, statistically speaking, it's impossible for the amount of women who claim this to truly not be able to.

If one doesn't want to, their choice, but own it. Don't perpetuate the idea that nursing successfully is so uncommon, or out of reach.

Lastly, it's been my experience that those who claim to be bashed actually just can't take an opinion different than their own. This group exists to help women succeed with breastfeeding, not to sugar coat responses for the overly-sensitive.


Quoting audmom1218:

No judgement from me on people who CHOSE not to breastfeed, but I do heavily direct judgement to professionals who perpetuate myths who either sabotage an otherwise healthy BF relationship, or lead moms to never try because they are afraid they won't succeed.  



mrs.hartman12
by Member on Apr. 2, 2013 at 9:41 AM
It does not matter to me how a mother chooses to feed her baby. My only concern is that mothers who want to breastfeed get support and correct information. Ff because you didn't have those things is not a choice but default. I understand because I was there with my first. I wish I had known someone like me.
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poosey08
by Member on Apr. 2, 2013 at 9:48 AM


This is a breastfeeding group, obviously its important to us :)

Quoting Sebbiemama:

Okay, the timing of this comment right after the nice one above it made me laugh. Clearly not everyone is here just to help you be sucessful at breastfeeding without being judgemental. Some people like being judgemental and they see nothing wrong with it. And CM is open to all types of women. You can't change them. Don't try. 

Quoting poosey08:

How can you not judge someone that doesn't want to give their children the best!

But not all women here judge those who do not breastfeed. I didn't sucessfully breastfeed for long with my first and you know what? He's a wonderful, healthy, happy little boy now! But I know breast milk is better than formula, so I'm here to learn how to do things better with my second. 

You can find advice and support here, but you just need to look over the heads of the haters every now and then. Lots of the folks here do seem to really want to help and I really appreciate them. But ultimately, I know these are just anonymous moms on some public chat-site. I need to research anything I learn here on my own and then make up my own mind for my own family. 



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