I think breastfeeding is making me depressed :(
From day one I've had issues with breastfeeding this time around. Baby had an awful latch that led to sore and cracked nipples. It wasn't long after that when we realized that baby wasnt gaining enough weight, then I found out I had OAL which was causing the baby to get gassy plus a foremilk/hindmilk imbalance. Baby still wasn't gaining through all of this so I had to supplement with formula a couple of times until we knew for sure it wasn't my supply and soon after found out that baby has a weak suck. She went to OT, her suck has improved, seems to be ok for the most part but I keep continuously worrying about my supply. My pumping output has dropped and now I don't wake up in the middle of the night or even the morning with my breasts feeling full like I used to. Baby's diaper count is still adequate, aside from the fact that she hasn't pooped in two days but I know that can be normal by this age. It's probably all in my head but I'm constantly stressed and worried when it comes to breastfeeding. I don't even know how I've managed to stick through it for as long as I have (baby is 12 weeks old). It didn't help that last week she went through those couple of days of fighting and refusing the breast. Its just been one thing after another, back to back.
I guess I just really need to vent about this because nobody else understands me. I want to breastfeed so badly and it's been so hard this time. I don't know why. I'm doing everything right and it's still so hard. Ugh :(