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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

My poor niece!

Posted by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 5:07 AM
  • 25 Replies
She's 19, her DD is nearly 8 months. She is very unsure of everything she's doing, but so very dedicated to breastfeeding. She's doing wonderfully. She's even doing child led solids! Soft table foods as her DD can handle. She's only tried bananas, avocado and peas. Her DD had BAD constipation with bananas.

She was letting her mom and dad & her in laws babysit. Until recently! One day she picked up her DD and spent the night up with her screaming in pain. She called her mom and asked if she'd had anything. Apparently, her mom was feeding the baby jarred gerber baby food and had given her bananas that day! She had given the baby so many foods shed never had! When my niece freaked her mom said, well I've raised 4 kids and you're all still alive! And her dad said my niece is being defiant and disobeying him by not allowing them to do WHATEVER they want to the baby! Including apparently their plan to pierce her ears next week even though my niece doesn't want to until her DD asks for it!

Then she left the baby for a couple minutes to pee with her inlaws and when she comes back her DD had a McDonalds French fry in her hand and is sipping on a soda!! She freaked (of course!!) and her inlaws said they've been giving her table foods & soda since she was 4-5 mo old!!

Now my niece won't let ANYONE be alone with the baby because they can't be trusted! She would allow me (only because she knows I have similar beliefs and would never disobey her wishes) but I live over an hour away! She's so upset and the only people that seem to understand are her DH and me.

I wish I could do something more for her!
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 5:07 AM
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Replies (1-10):
MusherMaggie
by Platinum Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 6:06 AM
Is there any way she could stay with you, even for a weekend? Can you help her find a La Leche League group near her? They have a website: WWW.LLLI.ORG
MumsTheWord571
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 6:18 AM
I offered that but her husband (yes, actually married) is against staying here. They do have their own apt but she's so upset! She was about to start college and now is rethinking it.

She does have a LLL chapter near her she visits but that's not like having your family being supportive.


Quoting MusherMaggie:

Is there any way she could stay with you, even for a weekend? Can you help her find a La Leche League group near her? They have a website: WWW.LLLI.ORG

melindabelcher
by mel on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:37 AM
:(
MusherMaggie
by Platinum Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:46 AM
1 mom liked this
Sometimes one has to ignore family in favor of one's child. Does her husband support her? They are both adults and need to stand up for themselves and their child. Have her come up with a set of instructions for when the grandparents are sitting. She can tell them that if they do not follow them, there will be no more babysitting. She can do this!
MommyO2-6631
by Leslie on Sep. 11, 2013 at 9:46 AM
I feel so bad for her!
cp428
by Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 10:03 AM

Poor thing.

It makes me so sad that someone's family would not only be so unsupportive, but deliberately disobey their wishes for their child.

MumsTheWord571
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 10:08 AM
She has. But they've told her that its their grand baby and they'll do as they like. Also told her she's being disobedient for saying anything about it!

Strange thing is: when my kids were little babies her mom watched them for date nights (yes we would make the long drive for a night out) and she never once tried this shenanigans with them! My niece never thought they'd try it with her baby if they never did with mine!


Quoting MusherMaggie:

Sometimes one has to ignore family in favor of one's child. Does her husband support her? They are both adults and need to stand up for themselves and their child. Have her come up with a set of instructions for when the grandparents are sitting. She can tell them that if they do not follow them, there will be no more babysitting. She can do this!

MumsTheWord571
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 10:09 AM
Oh and yes, her husband does support her.


Quoting MusherMaggie:

Sometimes one has to ignore family in favor of one's child. Does her husband support her? They are both adults and need to stand up for themselves and their child. Have her come up with a set of instructions for when the grandparents are sitting. She can tell them that if they do not follow them, there will be no more babysitting. She can do this!

amyroosmom
by on Sep. 11, 2013 at 10:38 AM

i totally know the feeling  when my DD was 6 months old  some family members of mine decided that it was time for my baby to have fast food and soda and i have to say i was furious i went off on them and their answer was well i have raised 3 kids i know what i'm doing. I have to say i first politly asked them to stop then i not so politly asked. and thankfully my DH was on my side and he was firm with them and that worked thank god... i have to say it really stinks when others won't respect your decisions and they feel that since they are family that they have the right to impose what ever they want with a child even though the child is not theirs. I was especially freaked out about the soda its so full of sugar and sooo bad for you i don't even drink the stuff and to think that my little princess was given that at such a young age is just unsettleing.

polkaspots
by Gold Member on Sep. 11, 2013 at 10:43 AM
It sucks. My in laws were like that until they heard the baby crying and I explained what they were doing. Shit never happened again. This kid didn't get a grain of rice for another month (Puerto Rican grandparents like to feed babies rice and beans)
She's a grown woman, time to step up and tell her mother she's incapable of being disobedient as she is the parent.
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