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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

so doesn't support bf after 2yo

Posted by on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:01 PM
  • 21 Replies
I have a problem. ....

My sons 2nd bday is comin up may 1st and my so absolutely does not want me to continue nursing past june. I'd like my son to theoretically self wean.... but I def think I'm gonna have to encourage it. Ive started to nightwean.

What do u do when your significant other is not supportive of nursimg past two? Do u ignore his wishes or what
by on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
ceckyl
by Kyla on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:04 PM
Yeah, I would ignore his opinion. Because it's just that. His opinion, which is trumped by sound medical and emotional and phycological benefits to your son.
Precious333
by Group Mod-Julia on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:15 PM
2 moms liked this
I did, but my dh didnt like it, but didnt ask me to stop (he knew I wouldnt). My personal opinion is that husbands should be respected, but that doesnt mean I will follow his every wish. We have discussions about certain things and one of us either gives or we find a compromise. You.have to decide what you are going to do. If ny dh told me that he wanted to wean by a certain age and our child wasnt ready and I wasnt ready than I would let him know my thoughts and give him facts. Then he would have to give me his research as well. If he doesnt have a good argument (really there us none) than I would say sorry, we arent ready. Really nursing needs to be decided between mom and child (it is their relationship), support by father is wonderful, but guys usually dont get it.
K8wizzo
by Kate on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:20 PM
He says absolutely not after 2 right now, but as you get there he may feel differently. This is a situation where you both bring facts and research to the table, you both listen, and you make an informed decision together. What doesn't he like about breastfeeding? Maybe if you figure that out youbcan find a workaround that addresses his issue (bedsharing, not feeling like he can touch your breasts, wanting adult time in the evenings, uncomfortable with NIP, etc) and still allows you to breastfeed.
LLbaby143
by Bronze Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:28 PM
I compromised by no longer nip. He doesn't like bedsharing because we get no alone time. And he hates that ds grabs at me amd pitches fits when I don't allow him to nurse that secnd. I only nurse morning nap 5pm and bedtime.

Quoting K8wizzo: He says absolutely not after 2 right now, but as you get there he may feel differently. This is a situation where you both bring facts and research to the table, you both listen, and you make an informed decision together. What doesn't he like about breastfeeding? Maybe if you figure that out youbcan find a workaround that addresses his issue (bedsharing, not feeling like he can touch your breasts, wanting adult time in the evenings, uncomfortable with NIP, etc) and still allows you to breastfeed.
destiny3513
by Bronze Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:40 PM

I'm still pushing for past one. Good luck.

K8wizzo
by Kate on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:57 PM
2 moms liked this
There is no reason to allow tantrums over nursing, and thry are not a reason to stop. If your ds threw a tantrum over not having an apple right this second would you never give him an apple again? To deal with tantrums regarding nursing, we ignored the behavior and I didn't nurse until my ds was calm and asked nicely. Guess what? Once he figured out that crying, screaming, and whining got him nothing, he stopped trying those methods. If your dh doesn't like bedsharing, that's an area that I would also try to compromise on after you've finished nightweaning. We had a spot on the floor beside our bed with a crib mattress, blanket, and pillow where our toddlers slept--still close, but we had our own space to do witn what we pleased. We still have that spot, just a sleeping bag now, for the kids to come and crash in the middle of the night if they are sick or scared. Maybe you could start ds in his own room and allow him to come to a similar spot if need be during the night. We had a no kids in bed until the sun was up rule--works well for toddlers because it's tangible.

Quoting LLbaby143: I compromised by no longer nip. He doesn't like bedsharing because we get no alone time. And he hates that ds grabs at me amd pitches fits when I don't allow him to nurse that secnd. I only nurse morning nap 5pm and bedtime.



Quoting K8wizzo: He says absolutely not after 2 right now, but as you get there he may feel differently. This is a situation where you both bring facts and research to the table, you both listen, and you make an informed decision together. What doesn't he like about breastfeeding? Maybe if you figure that out youbcan find a workaround that addresses his issue (bedsharing, not feeling like he can touch your breasts, wanting adult time in the evenings, uncomfortable with NIP, etc) and still allows you to breastfeed.
gdiamante
by Group Mod - Gina on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:02 PM

Mine didn't support nursing after age one... but never even noticed that I was still doing it. Not that I hid. It simply never registered.

gdiamante
by Group Mod - Gina on Jan. 8, 2014 at 9:05 PM
1 mom liked this


Quoting LLbaby143: I compromised by no longer nip. He doesn't like bedsharing because we get no alone time.
Heh heh... being a PARENT of a toddler kills alone time! 
And he hates that ds grabs at me amd pitches fits when I don't allow him to nurse that secnd. I only nurse morning nap 5pm and bedtime.
You are ignoring the fits, right? They will have tantrums over everything; it's part of the "civilizing" process.. Baby's normal; DH is expecting "not normal. " It's OK. Most dads do!
Babytazmama
by on Jan. 9, 2014 at 12:54 AM
I think bf is really hard for men to understand. Part of me thinks they are jealous of the closeness shared. My husband wanted me to stop at one year with both boys. I was worried about the affects of weening them before they were ready. Luckily, my first son stopped by himself at 33 months & my younger son is 31 months now & I'm hoping he will do the same.
sugarcrisp
by on Jan. 9, 2014 at 2:25 AM
2 moms liked this

I'd tell him to go suck an egg.

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