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Breast feeding and step child

Posted by on Jan. 12, 2014 at 3:28 AM
  • 17 Replies
My sd is 5and has never been around bf , I plan to nurse and in my home I don't plan to cover whether she's there or not , I do plan to go in my room to nurse in the beginning until I'm used to it but like I said no cover. I'm semi worried she's gunna tell her mom that she saw my boob and her mom freaking out (very likely she freaks over everything instead of calmly explaining stuff). I have no problem educating her on what I'm doing and why, just worried about that. Anyone else have similar issues? My mom is also all about me using a cover , while I do have one I'm not keen on constantly using it , I feel that'll cause more attention and fussing then just lifting the shirt to do our business. Any tips for making it a lil less obvious?
by on Jan. 12, 2014 at 3:28 AM
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polkaspots
by Gold Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 5:42 AM
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Here's what I do. I wear snug fitting tank tops with adjustable spaghetti straps and just pull the top down. I wear them every day and when I go out or have people over I wear something over it to pull up when I nurse. I wear a shirt or scarf over it to cover myself. Target has some nice nursing tops too, but I would recommend waiting until after the baby is born to go out and buy them. I bought two while I was pregnant and they never fit.
I've always been a tank top or tshirt and jeans kind of girl, so that was the easiest way for me to adjust how I dressed for nursing.
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Tea4Tas
by Bronze Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 5:50 AM

The two shirt method is great-you wear a tank top under a button ed shirt-the tank goes up and the shirt gets unbuttoned. Your belly is covered.  And you can use the shirt to cover the latching on.

In stead of going to the bedroom to latch on, explain to your SD you need a minute of privacy to latch the baby on and she should be polite  and look away.   How can anyone object to that? You are teaching her some manners.

jeniprice
by Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 9:12 AM
1 mom liked this
I guess I have a different opinion. You're feeding your baby. That's it. You don't have to cover in your own home. You don't have to cover anywhere! If your stepdaughter asks, simply say "I'm feeding your brother/sister." If she asks questions, answer them. Kids just want an answer, they don't need a long, drawn out explanation. If you are worried about her mother freaking out, tell her that you plan on breastfeeding and you have no intention of hiding it from her daughter. In fact, tell her that you'd like to use bf as a teaching opportunity for her. There are books on bf for kids too. Just my 2 cents.
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Mamasita7176
by Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 9:40 AM

I worried how my 4 year old would react. In the beginning I would latch baby and try to feed her while DD1 was distracted. I use two shirt method also (wish I knew of it back with DD1)! The best advice I got was: don't make an issue of it! Do not draw attention to it, but answer questions when asked. Short answers. Do not offer more than asked. My response was "babies drink mama milk. Mommies make mama milk and feed their babies. I may have referenced zoo mamas/babies once. Pretty sure she really didn't make it an issue. 


I also realized that our last sitter nursed while my DD was in her care. DD1 never mentioned anything about it! 


Just make it as natural as possible! It'll all work out fine!

Mrseoc
by Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 9:51 AM

Your SD needs to be educated on it. trust me you will not want to retreat to your room, or bother with a cover in your own house. 

I would go online and search for child friendly books or videos on introducing breastfeeding to young children.  She's at an age where, if unfamiliar with it or unprepared, she might feel uncomfortable. While we as adults understand there's nothing weird about it. She dosnt get that, and you dont want her to feel strange. It should be something she dosnt even feel the need to tell her mother about. So it would be important to prepare her before the baby comes. 

Her mother has nothing to say. Its breastfeeding, what does she want? If she thinks it's strange that's her problem but instilling that beleif in her child is wrong. 

If this where me, i would firstly talk to her mother. Let her know your going to breastfeed and you'd like little Daisy to learn about it so that she doesn't feel uncomfortable being in the room while you breastfeed. If she really has anything to say to that besides "alright sounds great!" then forget her. 

Take your SD to the store when you buy breastpads and other breastfeeding accsessories and fill her in on it. Tell her she's in charge of bringing you your nursing pillow and a glass of water (if she's into the idea of helping).  Just make it fun for her too. Good luck to you!!

Katt709
by Bronze Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 9:54 AM
I'm sorry I just don't understand. Just feed your baby. No need to hide or cover. It's completely natural. Don't worry about what others think.
hip2it
by Bronze Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 9:55 AM
I either wear two shirts or a loose shirt and just let it fall to cover my breast. No one can see anything. At home I'm generally just wearing a nursing sleep bra.
rwcw89
by Member on Jan. 12, 2014 at 10:33 AM
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Trust me I have no issues with explaining what I'm doing and why to her, she will probably find it funny (she finds anything with boobs butts and other body parts funny). Her mom and I are not on speaking terms, neither is her dad and mom, I'm expecting mass texts after this lol but oh well. I already told my df I am
Not covering up when she's here and they can get over it, it's my home and my place to be comfy.


Quoting Mrseoc:

Your SD needs to be educated on it. trust me you will not want to retreat to your room, or bother with a cover in your own house. 

I would go online and search for child friendly books or videos on introducing breastfeeding to young children.  She's at an age where, if unfamiliar with it or unprepared, she might feel uncomfortable. While we as adults understand there's nothing weird about it. She dosnt get that, and you dont want her to feel strange. It should be something she dosnt even feel the need to tell her mother about. So it would be important to prepare her before the baby comes. 

Her mother has nothing to say. Its breastfeeding, what does she want? If she thinks it's strange that's her problem but instilling that beleif in her child is wrong. 

If this where me, i would firstly talk to her mother. Let her know your going to breastfeed and you'd like little Daisy to learn about it so that she doesn't feel uncomfortable being in the room while you breastfeed. If she really has anything to say to that besides "alright sounds great!" then forget her. 

Take your SD to the store when you buy breastpads and other breastfeeding accsessories and fill her in on it. Tell her she's in charge of bringing you your nursing pillow and a glass of water (if she's into the idea of helping).  Just make it fun for her too. Good luck to you!!

gdiamante
by Group Mod - Gina on Jan. 12, 2014 at 1:49 PM
1 mom liked this

Your fiance needs to tell his ex to BACK OFF. I don't suppose you can block her? I'd delete her texts unread.

Biologically speaking you don't have anything your stepdaughter won't eventually have. I've known ALL MY LIFE what a breast was and what it did. I was raised with moms breastfeeding all around me. To me, breast = elbow. Be matter of fact, and your stepdaughter will be matter of fact.

aehanrahan
by Group Mod - Amy on Jan. 12, 2014 at 5:53 PM
1 mom liked this
Just make sure that she knows that breasts are for feeding babies. We're mammals and make milk for our babies.
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