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Breastfeeding Moms Breastfeeding Moms

Feeling really jealous... :(

Posted by on Apr. 2, 2014 at 8:48 AM
  • 19 Replies

So some friends of ours had a baby 2 weeks after I had my DD.  DD is almost 6 months old and EBF.  Our friend tried breastfeeding but gave up after about a month.  She started bottle feeding and put cereal in her daughters bottle.  Their child has slept through the night in a crib pretty much since then.  My DD still sleeps in our bed the majority of the night (the rest of the time she is in her rock and play next to the bed) and is up 2-3 times a night to eat.  Our friend posted on FB a pic of the baby and her boyfriend commented on how lucky they are she sleeps through the night every night.  I'm so jealous... :(  I want sleep so bad.  She also gets to stay home with her baby so she is always posting pics of all the fun things they get to do and all the places they get to go.  They also go out a lot and leave the baby with a sitter (something I believe is easier to do with a formula fed baby than a breastfed baby).  I have not left DD other than to go to work.  I really don't have a question.  I'm just jealous.  But I also know that by breastfeeding my daughter I am giving her the best I can.  I just have to keep reminding myself of that.  And eventually, DH and I will get our nights out.  When our babies are older.  Eventually DD will sleep through the night.  And there is no way to say that formula is what would make her sleep through the night.  Mostly just looking for a little encouragement today. 

by on Apr. 2, 2014 at 8:48 AM
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Replies (1-10):
KikiB85
by Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 8:57 AM
She probably is sleeping with a nice full belly. With my older kids i had a hard time sticking for breastfeeding and i would give a bottle of formula at night. It did help them sleep longer but i don't think it'sthe formula Ii think it was the nice solid bottle. Breastfeeding they take longer to get full. Bottle just suck it down and done.

My son is only 7 weeks and we go back and forth. Even breastfeeding some nights he wakes up more often. Other times he will sleep up to 4hrs and not wake.

i miss my sleep too. He's been quite fussy lately.

Hang in there momma!
alkakfnxcpoem
by Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 9:00 AM
I feel for you. Jack turned six months yesterday and still doesn't sleep through the night. We give him cereal before bed too, doesn't help. At least now he'll start off the night in the crib, but he always ends up with me.
Speaking as someone who is home with baby during the day (I work part time evenings), it's not all it's cracked up to be. Don't get me wrong I love being home with him but some days I just go crazy with frustration or boredom. Your friend just doesn't post about that part!
Mom2Just1
by Silver Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 9:26 AM
Don't be jealous. You're giving your baby he best. Frequent night waking is normal.
mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Apr. 2, 2014 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this
Remember that frequent night waking is nature's protection against SIDS. Having a full, heavy belly of slowly digesting food is not really good for babies and shouldn't be idealized for that side effect.

My bed sharing breastfeeding babies didn't hit 5 hour stretches of sleep until they were around 18 months old so I very much understand the desperation and sleep deprivation. Remember this is not a "sacrifice" but rather an *INVESTMENT*. I promise you some day you won't feel like a zombie and you'll forget most of the crummy parts and cling sweetly to the better parts.
mostlymaydays
by Group Mod-Stacy on Apr. 2, 2014 at 9:41 AM
2 moms liked this
On another note, cereal in the bottle is a choking hazard and even the AAP advises against it. Not to mention that babies don't produce the enzymes to digest grains until around a year of age. Best to just avoid cereal anyway. :-)
gdiamante
by Group Mod - Gina on Apr. 2, 2014 at 9:55 AM
1 mom liked this


Quoting Eternity807:

So some friends of ours had a baby 2 weeks after I had my DD.  DD is almost 6 months old and EBF.  Our friend tried breastfeeding but gave up after about a month.  She started bottle feeding and put cereal in her daughters bottle. 

Oh, dear. SIDS risk up the wazoo. That can KILL babies. Nothing to be jealous about there... be fearful instead. Your waking baby has a better chance of living to the first birthday than her sleeping baby does.

Their child has slept through the night in a crib pretty much since then. 

So what? Sleep is the world's greatest bore. **grin** Still see NOTHING to be jealous of. I kind of pity your friends; they're wimps thus far.

My DD still sleeps in our bed the majority of the night (the rest of the time she is in her rock and play next to the bed) and is up 2-3 times a night to eat.  Our friend posted on FB a pic of the baby and her boyfriend commented on how lucky they are she sleeps through the night every night.  I'm so jealous... :(  I want sleep so bad. 

You get sleep by dumping that which is necessary to survive. 

She also gets to stay home with her baby so she is always posting pics of all the fun things they get to do and all the places they get to go. 

Ehhhh... having been a SAHM... boring also. There are only so many times you can go to these places before you either run out of money or go insane from boredom!

They also go out a lot and leave the baby with a sitter (something I believe is easier to do with a formula fed baby than a breastfed baby). 

Not true. It's all down to baby. There are formula babies who cannot be left either; my brother was one of them. So were the babies I used to babysit!

I have not left DD other than to go to work.  I really don't have a question.  I'm just jealous. 

I see NOTHING to be jealous of. Nothing at all. I'm scared for her baby with that cereal in the bottle. Choking risk, SIDS risk, aspiration risk... I'd be less worried to see the baby left on a train track, that's how scary that idea is.

But I also know that by breastfeeding my daughter I am giving her the best I can.  I just have to keep reminding myself of that.  And eventually, DH and I will get our nights out.  When our babies are older.  Eventually DD will sleep through the night.  And there is no way to say that formula is what would make her sleep through the night.  Mostly just looking for a little encouragement today. 

You'll get all those things. And when you get them, you'll wonder why you were so eager to have them. **grin** True story: DH and I went on an overseas trip when our son was eight months old. THe WHOLE TIME, we missed him like crazy and kicked ourselves for not bringing him.  And keep in mind, I'd been thinking like you the entire time BEFORE that trip. We found that HAVING those things was nowhere near as satisfying as WANTING them.

The grass is NEVER greener on the other side of the fence.

It's a waste of time to covet what others have, because then you miss out on what you DO have.

Ms.Pteranodon
by Silver Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 10:45 AM
If it makes you feel any better my middle child who was formula fed slept far worse than my EBF baby.
omiestutz
by Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 11:03 AM

This. It's so dangerous to give baby cereal in their bottle. I would be scared for your friends baby. Your lil one will sleep through the night soon enough, and without the risk of death.

Quoting gdiamante:


Quoting Eternity807:

So some friends of ours had a baby 2 weeks after I had my DD.  DD is almost 6 months old and EBF.  Our friend tried breastfeeding but gave up after about a month.  She started bottle feeding and put cereal in her daughters bottle. 

Oh, dear. SIDS risk up the wazoo. That can KILL babies. Nothing to be jealous about there... be fearful instead. Your waking baby has a better chance of living to the first birthday than her sleeping baby does.

Their child has slept through the night in a crib pretty much since then. 

So what? Sleep is the world's greatest bore. **grin** Still see NOTHING to be jealous of. I kind of pity your friends; they're wimps thus far.

My DD still sleeps in our bed the majority of the night (the rest of the time she is in her rock and play next to the bed) and is up 2-3 times a night to eat.  Our friend posted on FB a pic of the baby and her boyfriend commented on how lucky they are she sleeps through the night every night.  I'm so jealous... :(  I want sleep so bad. 

You get sleep by dumping that which is necessary to survive. 

She also gets to stay home with her baby so she is always posting pics of all the fun things they get to do and all the places they get to go. 

Ehhhh... having been a SAHM... boring also. There are only so many times you can go to these places before you either run out of money or go insane from boredom!

They also go out a lot and leave the baby with a sitter (something I believe is easier to do with a formula fed baby than a breastfed baby). 

Not true. It's all down to baby. There are formula babies who cannot be left either; my brother was one of them. So were the babies I used to babysit!

I have not left DD other than to go to work.  I really don't have a question.  I'm just jealous. 

I see NOTHING to be jealous of. Nothing at all. I'm scared for her baby with that cereal in the bottle. Choking risk, SIDS risk, aspiration risk... I'd be less worried to see the baby left on a train track, that's how scary that idea is.

But I also know that by breastfeeding my daughter I am giving her the best I can.  I just have to keep reminding myself of that.  And eventually, DH and I will get our nights out.  When our babies are older.  Eventually DD will sleep through the night.  And there is no way to say that formula is what would make her sleep through the night.  Mostly just looking for a little encouragement today. 

You'll get all those things. And when you get them, you'll wonder why you were so eager to have them. **grin** True story: DH and I went on an overseas trip when our son was eight months old. THe WHOLE TIME, we missed him like crazy and kicked ourselves for not bringing him.  And keep in mind, I'd been thinking like you the entire time BEFORE that trip. We found that HAVING those things was nowhere near as satisfying as WANTING them.

The grass is NEVER greener on the other side of the fence.

It's a waste of time to covet what others have, because then you miss out on what you DO have.


MusherMaggie
by Platinum Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 11:04 AM
Look at yourself in the mirror. Tell yoursel, "I am a good mother. Iam doing my very best. It is all worth it! :-)".

Whenever you are ready for that night out, take it!
Seniahmom
by Member on Apr. 2, 2014 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this
This!

And if it helps both my children were/are EBF (still nursing my 2 year old). My oldest started sleeping through the night at exactly 12 weeks (5-7 hour stretches). I'm still waiting for the 2 year old to do so. ;) Ok I exaggerate a bit - but some kids sleep, some don't. It will happen eventually. No worries Momma. I've been there. It's hard to watch/hear what others do while you are working. It's sad and overwhelming and frustrating. It's ok. You will still get those moments with baby and they will be that much more precious. I would tell myself that those middle of the night cuddles were our special time together, that it only makes our breastfeeding relationship that much stronger and that when he goes off to college I will be glad we had that time together.

Quoting MusherMaggie: Look at yourself in the mirror. Tell yoursel, "I am a good mother. Iam doing my very best. It is all worth it! :-)".

Whenever you are ready for that night out, take it!
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