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"Crying it out"

Posted by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:09 PM
  • 75 Replies
Ladies, I'm a ftm and am set to deliver any time now. I'm reading books on soothing, breast feeding and sleeping. They all seem to give conflicting advice. :( So, I have a couple of questions if you don't mind: did you let your baby cry it out instead of going to them to sooth during the night or during naps? Also, did you stick to strict bed time schedules? Were their daytime naps also at pretty specific times? Finally, would you describe your babies as good sleepers and is it, in your opinion because of the particular method you used? Thank you in advance for anyone who answers. I'm excited but scared as well!
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:09 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MusherMaggie
by Ruby Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:17 PM
9 moms liked this
Not trying to be ugly, but you're reading all the wrong stuff, especially if you're going to be breastfeeding. No schedules. You feed on demand, every time the baby wiggles, especially during the first year. Sleeping through the night happens when they're developmentally ready, and shouldn't be forced. Pediatricians are great for illness and injury, but not much else with rare exception. Read posts here and on Kellymom.com, abd these two books: "So That's What They're For" by Janet Tamaro and "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" from La Leche League. Human babies are designed to be fed frequently and stay close to their mothers. Sleep training and "crying it out" grew out of the formula feeding culture and rigid parenting practices of the 19th and early 20th centuries. Unfortunately, a lot of bad information is still out there.
suroundedbyboys
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:22 PM
1 mom liked this
My favorite book I read was while my 3rd child was a newborn, the womanly art of breast feeding! I highly recommend it!
rsmom2511
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:24 PM
Yikes! Ok, so how long do would you feed on demand? Is there an age where you don't have to be as 'in demand' so to speak? Lol... I bought the La Leche Leagues 'Womanly Art...' Its on my night stand!! :)

Wait, I just reread your post..you said on demand for the first year. Thanks!

Quoting MusherMaggie: Not trying to be ugly, but you're reading all the wrong stuff, especially if you're going to be breastfeeding. No schedules. You feed on demand, every time the baby wiggles, especially during the first year. Sleeping through the night happens when they're developmentally ready, and shouldn't be forced. Pediatricians are great for illness and injury, but not much else with rare exception. Read posts here and on Kellymom.com, abd these two books: "So That's What They're For" by Janet Tamaro and "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" from La Leche League. Human babies are designed to be fed frequently and stay close to their mothers. Sleep training and "crying it out" grew out of the formula feeding culture and rigid parenting practices of the 19th and early 20th centuries. Unfortunately, a lot of bad information is still out there.
Mom2Just1
by Silver Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:25 PM
Ditch those books! We don't CIO
Ever! We co sleep, feed on demand, etc.
rsmom2511
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:27 PM
And would you say your baby is a good sleeper?

Quoting Mom2Just1: Ditch those books! We don't CIO
Ever! We co sleep, feed on demand, etc.
JodyR82
by Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:28 PM

You feed 'on demand" for the first year. You can start solids at 6 months but food is just for fun till one. It's hard and I recommend a sling so you can get stuff done especially in the early months when they are attached at the boob all the time. To be honest and not to frighten you but my son just turned one and is still up every two hours at night. I co-sleep which is how I get any rest whatsoever. You'll find the women on this board are very in favor of co sleeping. In general my baby naps about two hours after he wakes up and sometimes in the afternoon and has for some time now. If you pay attention to your baby they will set their own schedule. I don't agree with cry-it-out methods as they just seem incredibly cruel. Hope that helps.

notjstanothrmom
by Bronze Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:29 PM
1 mom liked this

Babies aren't meant to be forced into a routine. They should be fed and loved on demand. Letting a baby cry because you need to run to the bathroom or do something really quick is one thing, but letting your baby cry because they "should" be sleeping is not healthy. People do it all the time and claim no adverse effect but science shows otherwise.

Babies want to be near their mothers, it's a natural instinct.

We do not practice CIO but sometimes my youngest has to cry because I have things that need to be done and I can't do with him. I do utilize a carrier that allows me to be hands free while I do some things if he's fussing. We start a bed time around 1 years old, but up till then the baby usually stays up with us and falls asleep while we're hanging out relaxing. My kids always napped around the same time everyday but not strict on times. We really follow their cues in terms of sleep and hunger. 

We practice what is given the term "attachment parenting" which has a bad rep but we feel it's right to follow their cues and allow them to teach us as much as we want to teach them. It's backed by loads of science being a great way to raise independent trusting adults. My older two were also raised with the "AP" lifestyle though I didn't know it had a name at the time. They're both wonderfully independent kids. 

Mom2Just1
by Silver Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:31 PM
First one is. Second one is not terrible. He wakes once at 19 months.

Quoting rsmom2511: And would you say your baby is a good sleeper?

Quoting Mom2Just1: Ditch those books! We don't CIO
Ever! We co sleep, feed on demand, etc.
awilliamson
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:33 PM
From a fellow ftm, the first 2 months, you're going to feel like baby is nursing more than he/she is not! That's normal. You may feel like you're "out of milk", but you are not. It gets pretty rough. YOU CAN DO IT!!!

We cosleep, so I can't offer much advice in terms of crib sleeping. I can, however, assure you that baby WILL be up during the night, for quite a while. That's all normal :) Lastly, get DH/SO on your team. Your number 1 fan. His attitude during those difficult, late nights is ever so helpful.
rsmom2511
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 7:34 PM
Ok thank you so much.

Quoting JodyR82:

You feed 'on demand" for the first year. You can start solids at 6 months but food is just for fun till one. It's hard and I recommend a sling so you can get stuff done especially in the early months when they are attached at the boob all the time. To be honest and not to frighten you but my son just turned one and is still up every two hours at night. I co-sleep which is how I get any rest whatsoever. You'll find the women on this board are very in favor of co sleeping. In general my baby naps about two hours after he wakes up and sometimes in the afternoon and has for some time now. If you pay attention to your baby they will set their own schedule. I don't agree with cry-it-out methods as they just seem incredibly cruel. Hope that helps.

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