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Okay, this is it!!!!! *EDIT: READ*

Posted by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:38 AM
  • 14 Replies

I always said that I was not going to nurse my DD past 2, and she will be 2 in May. I am more than ready for this. However, I have no idea how to go about it, so I need your help! This child is a booby fein. She nurses throughout the day and all night still, so I know this is going to be tough. How do I do this the right way? She doesn't have a set amount of nursing times per day so it's not like I can just cut one back and know that I even made a difference. I was thinking what if I cut out the second part of the day, until bed time, for a few weeks. Then cut out the begining of the day, then do night time. Do you guys think that would work okay? How do I get through the tantrums that I know are bound to come?? I'm dreading this, but looking forward to it at the same time..

EDIT: I just had a thought. Could I go on an estrogen birthcontrol pill to dry my milk up? Then there's no possibility of mastisis and hopefully once she realizes theres no milk she'll want to stop nursing. Good idea or no?

by on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:38 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Precious333
by Group Admin - Julia on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:44 AM
1 mom liked this
You can do one of several things. One is you can do the whole, don't offer dont refuse and allow weaning to happen on its own (that could take years if you are ok with that).

Or you can cut out times. You can start with the times she least cares about first, and use lots of distractions. I found a special snack or drink, some special activities. Then slowly cut out harder times to break, usually the hardest for us were before naps and bedtime, or when waking up.

I actually started with night weaning first with my kids because I needed sleep. I used dr. Jay gordon's method, and they learned that milk was gone at night, and learned to snuggle. Then I limited the time during the day. So, my kids were allowed to nurse while I sang twinkle little star. Then I cut out certain times during the day.

coffeemom37043
by Dare on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:49 AM

I haven't offered in a long time, so I don't think that's the way to go to be done by 2 unfortunately. The thing with her is she doesn't really have times where she cares about it more than others...she is pretty insistant all the way around =[ Did your kids sleep more when you stopped nursing at night? I'm SO ready for a full night's sleep! I haven't had one since she was born

Quoting Precious333: You can do one of several things. One is you can do the whole, don't offer dont refuse and allow weaning to happen on its own (that could take years if you are ok with that). Or you can cut out times. You can start with the times she least cares about first, and use lots of distractions. I found a special snack or drink, some special activities. Then slowly cut out harder times to break, usually the hardest for us were before naps and bedtime, or when waking up. I actually started with night weaning first with my kids because I needed sleep. I used dr. Jay gordon's method, and they learned that milk was gone at night, and learned to snuggle. Then I limited the time during the day. So, my kids were allowed to nurse while I sang twinkle little star. Then I cut out certain times during the day.


Precious333
by Group Admin - Julia on Feb. 18, 2015 at 10:50 AM
I don't know if they slept more, but I did.

Quoting coffeemom37043:

I haven't offered in a long time, so I don't think that's the way to go to be done by 2 unfortunately. The thing with her is she doesn't really have times where she cares about it more than others...she is pretty insistant all the way around =[ Did your kids sleep more when you stopped nursing at night? I'm SO ready for a full night's sleep! I haven't had one since she was born

Quoting Precious333: You can do one of several things. One is you can do the whole, don't offer dont refuse and allow weaning to happen on its own (that could take years if you are ok with that).

Or you can cut out times. You can start with the times she least cares about first, and use lots of distractions. I found a special snack or drink, some special activities. Then slowly cut out harder times to break, usually the hardest for us were before naps and bedtime, or when waking up.

I actually started with night weaning first with my kids because I needed sleep. I used dr. Jay gordon's method, and they learned that milk was gone at night, and learned to snuggle. Then I limited the time during the day. So, my kids were allowed to nurse while I sang twinkle little star. Then I cut out certain times during the day.

melindabelcher
by mel on Feb. 18, 2015 at 11:00 AM
1 mom liked this
You can do blocks of times without nursing.
You can limit it to before bed and first thing in the morning.
As for the tantrums they will come. Your no longer going to be giving her something she obviously likes a lot.

I not one to stop because they are x age. It's no different nursing a 1yr11mo and a 2yo and a 2yr1mo. It's still a need to the child.
As for night waking it's not usually related to nursing.
My almost 3yo still wakes at night but she doesn't nurse.
gdiamante
by Gina on Feb. 19, 2015 at 8:55 AM

Yes, you can go on estrogen. No. it won't mean she will automatically stop. We've seen toddlers dry nurse on their pregnant moms for long stretches after the milk is gone.

She's old enough to understand time markers. Start setting them. "We'll nurse after Daniel Tiger." Then keep the promise. Use those time markers and routine to stetch out the periods between nursing. Do that with one session per week. It will take as many weeks as she nurses in a day.

And let me be sincere in this: Don't set the two year marker for yourself. Let it happen when it happens, even thoguh you're leading it. Because if you don't make that marker you'll be unhappy about it. If you happen to make it anyway or go earlier, then you can be pleased. But I'm not a fan of goal-setting for anything that involves cooperation of someone outside of the age of reason, y'know?

gdiamante
by Gina on Feb. 19, 2015 at 9:01 AM

Death, taxes, never sleeping a full night again... my mother promised me that and darn it, another of the many things she was right about! Mine's 15 years old, and worries about his schooling did more to murder sleep than nursing ever did. **grin**

To be fair, though, my husband causes the sleeplessness most of the time in the past 3-4 years, not in a good way. Health issues.

Quoting coffeemom37043:

 Did your kids sleep more when you stopped nursing at night? I'm SO ready for a full night's sleep! I haven't had one since she was born

Cleo07
by Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2015 at 10:07 AM
1 mom liked this
Totally agree with this. My son who is now 3 years, 4 months, was still nursing every two hours during the day until age two. Last year, I began distracting him from the booby times that weren't as important to him and decreasing how long he nursed. I also cut out the nighttime nursing (for the most part) but left him his all important wake up booby (morning and naps). I really wouldn't set a strict time when she has to be finished like Gina said above. Nursing is still important past the age of two for lots of reasons and maybe if you get her down to a more acceptable (to you) nursing schedule, you will find it's ok to continue without a dramatic finish. My son now nurses about five times a week and it has been a very drama free process because it was done slowly. I really never planned on nursing this long but i learned quite a bit about the benefits of breastfeeding longer and here we are. I plan on him hopefully being done in a few months. Either way, congratulations for breastfeeding for two years.

Quoting gdiamante:

Yes, you can go on estrogen. No. it won't mean she will automatically stop. We've seen toddlers dry nurse on their pregnant moms for long stretches after the milk is gone.

She's old enough to understand time markers. Start setting them. "We'll nurse after Daniel Tiger." Then keep the promise. Use those time markers and routine to stetch out the periods between nursing. Do that with one session per week. It will take as many weeks as she nurses in a day.

And let me be sincere in this: Don't set the two year marker for yourself. Let it happen when it happens, even thoguh you're leading it. Because if you don't make that marker you'll be unhappy about it. If you happen to make it anyway or go earlier, then you can be pleased. But I'm not a fan of goal-setting for anything that involves cooperation of someone outside of the age of reason, y'know?

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Travelbugg
by Bronze Member on Feb. 19, 2015 at 10:23 AM
I'd work on cutting the middle of the night nursing first, if that will help you get more sleep...as in break the association that comfort equals nursing, and do cuddles and kisses when she wakes up instead of boobie. I have a friend who's 3.5 year old still wants to nurse all night. It's absolutely just a comfort thing for him now, And she has no idea how to end it. ( I personally can't imagine going 3.5 years without a full nights sleep!)
But then my first weaned wicked early (too early. But that's a different story.) ....so I've not had the experience of weaning a stubborn toddler! Good luck. :)!
MaryJarrett
by on Feb. 19, 2015 at 10:25 AM
DR. Jay Gordon has a great night weaning method. That's where I'd start.

coffeemom37043
by Dare on Feb. 19, 2015 at 10:44 AM

I'm not super strict about the 2 year mark. I just wanted to be done around then. I won't mind if it goes like 3 or 4 months after if need be. I want to make this whole thing as easy on her as possible

Quoting gdiamante:

Yes, you can go on estrogen. No. it won't mean she will automatically stop. We've seen toddlers dry nurse on their pregnant moms for long stretches after the milk is gone.

She's old enough to understand time markers. Start setting them. "We'll nurse after Daniel Tiger." Then keep the promise. Use those time markers and routine to stetch out the periods between nursing. Do that with one session per week. It will take as many weeks as she nurses in a day.

And let me be sincere in this: Don't set the two year marker for yourself. Let it happen when it happens, even thoguh you're leading it. Because if you don't make that marker you'll be unhappy about it. If you happen to make it anyway or go earlier, then you can be pleased. But I'm not a fan of goal-setting for anything that involves cooperation of someone outside of the age of reason, y'know?


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