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CRAPPY FRIEND......seriously, wth

Posted by on Nov. 20, 2009 at 10:10 PM
  • 4 Replies

 I've been friends with this girl for my entire life. We've been there for eachother through everything-jobs, relationships, losing our parents, everything. She and her husband moved out of state a few years ago. Even though it was hard to reach her before then, it became even harder to reach her once she moved out of state. I don't think her husband is controlling by any means. And this girl is so nice to everybody and has always been a really good person. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding and she was the matron of honor in mine. She is also the godmother of my one-year-old son. She and her husband have had trouble having a baby, they've been trying for 5 years, but the fact that I have a baby never bothered her, she said. She's never even been mad at me, and it's hard to get mad at her. But lately it's getting easier. She won't keep in touch. I've seen her three times in the past two years, even though she has been up here way more than that. She doesn't come up often because she can't drive and her work schedule is very conflicting. I've seen her once this year, this past June for my son's baptism, and I rarely even saw her at all then, just during the service and for a short while at the after-party at my parents' house.  She seemed okay, like she wasn't upset about anything and she smiled for the pictures we took. I've spoken to her ONE TIME since then on the phone, and this is November. My son just celebrated his 1st birthday and his godmother takes no interest at all. She never calls or emails, even though she knows how to reach me. I don't bombard her with calls. I never hear squat from her. She keeps in touch with our mutual friends but not me. I just found out through a mutual friend that she is comin up to our hometown for a whole week tomorrow. She never even told me, I never knew anything about it. I doubt she has any plans to even contact me. I tried to email her, told her I was disappointed that she does not keep in touch ( but this is before I found out she was coming up here tomorrow ). I don't get it. I am so hurt and angry. What should I do?

It's not the meaning of life. It's the feeling of life.

I am a passionate, extended-rear-facing, therapeutic-music-listening, happily married, dog-loving, Galant-driving, husband-charming, formula-feeding, housework-doing, traveling, Facebook-blogging, Dr. Phil-watching, stay at home mama with morals and heart.
I am a formula-feeding, disposable-diapering, pro-life, extended-rear-facing, non-co-sleeping, vaccinating, pro-epidural, babyproofing, SIDS-awareness-promoting, public-schooling momma to my beautiful and perfect son Miles, born 11-19-08!!!
by on Nov. 20, 2009 at 10:10 PM
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by on Nov. 20, 2009 at 10:31 PM
Either She has grown apart from you...Or she's not really a good friend like you thought she was. I think you had a good idea of telling her you were hurt about not being able to talk as much. If I was you I would sit back and see if she contacts you..If she does I hope you two can work things out.. If Not, then you might have to find a new friend.
by on Nov. 20, 2009 at 11:05 PM

I actually have experience with this. I was the person who stopped talking to a friend, and it was because i wanted to end the friendship. The thing that bugs me about this is that you guys have a history. I cant see someone giving you the brush off after a lifetime of friendship. Maybe you should tell her how much you love her and that you miss her and after that start moving on. If she responds, great, but prepare yourself for no response. People are strange, you cant get inside her head though. 

by Ruby Member on Nov. 21, 2009 at 4:12 PM

Sounds like my daughter. She moved out of state a couple years ago with her job. When she comes home, frequently, not everyone knows it. She has a large circle of family/friends, and only really tells those she intends on hanging around with.....otherwise there seems to be a fight over who gets her. haha. 

Maybe you should go there to visit her. 

by on Nov. 21, 2009 at 4:26 PM

Sometimes people grow up and they change.  Me and my best friend growing up were inseparable.  But when she got married, it's like everything ended.  It sucked.  But I had to eventually find new friends.  I think what came between us is that as I got older I realized who she really was and I'm just so different then her.  Sometimes we have to part ways and find someone that we can truly connect with.  My best friend now we are like 2 peas in a pod :)

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