So, I host Thanksgiving at my house and my MIL issues started a week ago when MIL bought things to bring without asking me what I needed. She decided to brings appetizers and I do not usually do aps. And I really needed her to do some veggies for me. She refused and my mom did double the work and brought a bunch of veggie dishes. And she bought stuff for cheese cake and was pissed when I told her I already had someone doing desserts and she was doing cheese cake and I did not need 2 of them. Then on the phone she proceeded to tell me I was negative about my baby Molly's development and did not want her to succeed. She has spine and neck issues and low muscle tone. So she can not sit up, crawl, roll from back to belly, and can not hold her head up with out support and she is 5 months old. She has OT and PT and I want her to overcome things butI am told on a regular basis that may not happen and she may never crawl or walk. So, I am realistic, I am not gonna pretend all is okay. Anyway that conversation did not end well.
Then today she arrived 1 hour early and I was not ready. Then she complained about my house being messy-hello I was not finished cleaning cus she was not supposed to be there. Then she wanted to know why I was being so unsocial. I was freakin finishing cooking cus SHE WAS EARLY! GRRR! Then her appetizers all had gluten and wheat which my DD is alergic too. She knows that and everyone else tries to make things Lilly can have. SO dd was upset she could not eat them. Then MIL decided when i was not in the room give DD 1 and she would be okay. Well guess what? DD puked EVERYWHERE after! Dumb Ass! Cleaning up puke was not how I wanted to start my day!!!!!
Then lastly to prove her point MIL tried make my baby sit without supporting her back and she was flopping all over. She told me I need to just make her do it like that to learn! It was aweful and my baby was fussin and uncomfortable. Poor thing can't do that and it hurts her. And I have been told by her OT and PT that is not good for her. I had to take her and tell MIL that I would take my advice from her PT and OT. Then later MIL was talking through Molly (which I hate) and saying, "Mommy needs to get you a walker so you can see everything. She like just leaving you on the floor, that does not help you does it?" I was so pissed! She freakin needs to be on the floor! I bought a special mat at the PT's request to put her on the floor! I nicely said, Walkers are not recomended for any baby because it is bad for their back and they can actually delay walking. And Molly is way to weak for a walker if I did want to use one." I mean come on the poor thing has NO leg strength and her spine could never support herself in a walker. So the my MIL tells me I am redictulous and I am going to hold Molly back with my own fears and parania!! I just took a deep breath took my baby and walked away!
GGRRRRR! I wish I did not have to deal with her all the time! She sucks! And DH things she can do no wrong! So much fun!!!! Thanks for letting me vent!!!!!!!
I am Kelly, 32 yr old Mom of 4 Girls! Caitlin 5 yrs, Lilly 3 yrs, Molly born 6/19/09 and my angel Elysse born 2/05/08, married to my wonderful husband Jeff for 6 yrs, I am a domestic violence survivor, infant loss survivor, swine flu 30 days in a medically induced coma survivor, I am a attatchment parenting momma, non CIO momma, and a passionate breastfeeding momma who will breastfeed anywhere anytime my baby is hungry, My girls are my everything and I live for them! =-) That is me in a nutshell!
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I am so sorry you have to deal with that witch!!!!
You know, though, I was told my Molly would never walk, talk... anything.... "semi-vegetative" was a word thrown around alot about Molly Kate.... and guess fricken what.... with tons (and thats means 10-12 hours a day in me working with her) of therapy Molly is talking at 17 months.... she has 43 words... and her hypotonia is correcting... she can take take 3-4 steps from the couch to the table.... she isn't walking on her own yet but she will in the next few months... she even stands up on her own without holding onto anything when she isn't thinking about it!!!!! This from a little girl who was supposed to be and do nothing!
DO NOT, DO NOT let anyone tell you your Molly may not walk or crawl.... YOU work with her and YOU find the best specialists (like I did) and it will happen if it is meant to..... and tell your MIL to bite her own ass in the meantime!!!
Thank you so much for sharing that with me. I work with my Molly a lot and she has both OT, and PT 2 times a week and is in a message therapy class. I will work my butt of with her to help her. But, I also am realistic and will accept her and be happy with her no matter what her restrictions are. I am so glad your Molly is doing so well! I think my Molly is gonna prove everyone wrong too!!!!
Quoting Mom2LiamNMolly:
I am so sorry you have to deal with that witch!!!!
You know, though, I was told my Molly would never walk, talk... anything.... "semi-vegetative" was a word thrown around alot about Molly Kate.... and guess fricken what.... with tons (and thats means 10-12 hours a day in me working with her) of therapy Molly is talking at 17 months.... she has 43 words... and her hypotonia is correcting... she can take take 3-4 steps from the couch to the table.... she isn't walking on her own yet but she will in the next few months... she even stands up on her own without holding onto anything when she isn't thinking about it!!!!! This from a little girl who was supposed to be and do nothing!
DO NOT, DO NOT let anyone tell you your Molly may not walk or crawl.... YOU work with her and YOU find the best specialists (like I did) and it will happen if it is meant to..... and tell your MIL to bite her own ass in the meantime!!!
I am Kelly, 32 yr old Mom of 4 Girls! Caitlin 5 yrs, Lilly 3 yrs, Molly born 6/19/09 and my angel Elysse born 2/05/08, married to my wonderful husband Jeff for 6 yrs, I am a domestic violence survivor, infant loss survivor, swine flu 30 days in a medically induced coma survivor, I am a attatchment parenting momma, non CIO momma, and a passionate breastfeeding momma who will breastfeed anywhere anytime my baby is hungry, My girls are my everything and I live for them! =-) That is me in a nutshell!
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Where is your husband through all this? He really needs to have a serious sit-down with her.
Oh girl, I can only imagine how pissed you must have been! I would have snapped a the half way point. People who know NOTHING about your situation giving advise is absurd. You did the right thing by telling her you'd get your advice from the proper place. What business does a 5 month old have in a walker? none.
No one else at your house said anything when all this was going on? If DH won't muzzle his mother you have every right to leave her out of holidays. Not only is she inappropriate she is potentially harmful. She could hurt your kids by making them do things they are not developmentally ready for and feeding them things that upset their little bellies.
Stay positive about the baby. Our DD was never supposed to walk or talk and she does both beautifully. It took lots of work but it happened. We had your mind set also. We'd do everything we could to help her but would love her if it never happened. It used to piss me off to no end when people dismissed my feelings about DD. Apparently I was supposed to pretend I never worried about her future.
I would have said something when she gave your DD something. And the final straw would have been trying to make the baby sit up. If the baby was getting fussy etc I would have been so pissed and let her have it and taken my child from her.
Sorry you had to deal with that.
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on Nov. 26, 2009 at 11:22 PM