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who decides if a child can get a hair cut in a divorce situation?

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Poll

Question: who decides if a child can get a hair cut in a divorce situation IF THEY CAN NOT AGREE? (child wants certain cut. one parent says ok the other says NO WAY!)

Options:

mom

dad

custodial parent

non-custodial parent

parent of the same sex

parent of the opposite sex


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 74

View Results

she wants something like this but with bangs.

I love being married.  It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.  ~Rita Rudner

by on May. 2, 2012 at 12:23 PM
Replies (71-79):
nosborne
by on May. 3, 2012 at 5:04 PM

 Woops, I didn't read all the replies.  I though she was your DD, not SD. 

However, I still stand by what I said.  Since your DH has full custody he should get the final say in the haircut.

fullxbusymom
by Bronze Member on May. 3, 2012 at 6:34 PM

Yes she would have to have it long.  We may compromise to the middle of her back but little girls in my opinion should have long hair and my husband 100% agrees with me.  It is my decision as the parent just like my boys can't opt to have long hair while under our roof either. 

Quoting atlmom2:

Wow, my dd had super short hair until high school because that is what she wanted.  What if your dd didn't want long hair?  You would make her anyway???  This is why its not about the parents, its about the child.  Making them happy.  My dh would never and has never cared about our girls hair and they are 21 and 18.  It was never discussed. 

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Sorry but if there is joint custody both parents must agree or it doesn't happen.  I can totally see the big deal some say it is just hair to me it is so much more than that.

If I had a daughter her hair would be too her butt and she would not be allowed to cut it until she was in middle school.  My husband and I agree on this 100%.  Just like my boys have no choice but to keep their hair relatively short and neat at all times (they are 15, 13 & 5).  If they want it long like a girls then they can wait till they are 18. 



atlmom2
by Susie on May. 3, 2012 at 7:26 PM

Ok, I just think its easier to please the kids with something like this.  My dd hated long hair.  I mean if it was on her neck she wanted it off.  She looked great in super short hair and why torture her because its what the parents want?  My youngest had long hair always has but she loves it.  Even now my short haired dd is 21 and only likes it barely to her shoulders.  That is it.  She is just not meant to have long hair.  I agree, don't like super long hair on boys past the shoulders either.  Bigger fish to fry in the world than length of hair though. 

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Yes she would have to have it long.  We may compromise to the middle of her back but little girls in my opinion should have long hair and my husband 100% agrees with me.  It is my decision as the parent just like my boys can't opt to have long hair while under our roof either. 

Quoting atlmom2:

Wow, my dd had super short hair until high school because that is what she wanted.  What if your dd didn't want long hair?  You would make her anyway???  This is why its not about the parents, its about the child.  Making them happy.  My dh would never and has never cared about our girls hair and they are 21 and 18.  It was never discussed. 

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Sorry but if there is joint custody both parents must agree or it doesn't happen.  I can totally see the big deal some say it is just hair to me it is so much more than that.

If I had a daughter her hair would be too her butt and she would not be allowed to cut it until she was in middle school.  My husband and I agree on this 100%.  Just like my boys have no choice but to keep their hair relatively short and neat at all times (they are 15, 13 & 5).  If they want it long like a girls then they can wait till they are 18. 




Come join me at The Duggars Debate, The Good, The Bad and the Ugly

newfound09
by Member on May. 3, 2012 at 8:35 PM

I am the custodial parent and I make the decision on when my children get their hair cut and how. My DD has chin length hair and she is 3. My DS has a buzzcut and he is 2. 

danie24
by Platinum Member on May. 4, 2012 at 9:40 AM
You and your husband are ridiculous control freaks. Good luck with that.

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Yes she would have to have it long.  We may compromise to the middle of her back but little girls in my opinion should have long hair and my husband 100% agrees with me.  It is my decision as the parent just like my boys can't opt to have long hair while under our roof either. 


Quoting atlmom2:

Wow, my dd had super short hair until high school because that is what she wanted.  What if your dd didn't want long hair?  You would make her anyway???  This is why its not about the parents, its about the child.  Making them happy.  My dh would never and has never cared about our girls hair and they are 21 and 18.  It was never discussed. 


Quoting fullxbusymom:

Sorry but if there is joint custody both parents must agree or it doesn't happen.  I can totally see the big deal some say it is just hair to me it is so much more than that.

If I had a daughter her hair would be too her butt and she would not be allowed to cut it until she was in middle school.  My husband and I agree on this 100%.  Just like my boys have no choice but to keep their hair relatively short and neat at all times (they are 15, 13 & 5).  If they want it long like a girls then they can wait till they are 18. 



Posted on CafeMom Mobile
danie24
by Platinum Member on May. 4, 2012 at 9:47 AM
I agree. I would resent my parents if they had to control every aspect of my life growing up.

I hated long hair when I was younger. So I always kept it short. I played sports and was really active so long hair was just a pain..

Parents need to pick their battles. As long as kids aren't making unhealthy choices, they should have the freedom to make some.


Quoting atlmom2:

Wow, my dd had super short hair until high school because that is what she wanted.  What if your dd didn't want long hair?  You would make her anyway???  This is why its not about the parents, its about the child.  Making them happy.  My dh would never and has never cared about our girls hair and they are 21 and 18.  It was never discussed. 


Quoting fullxbusymom:

Sorry but if there is joint custody both parents must agree or it doesn't happen.  I can totally see the big deal some say it is just hair to me it is so much more than that.

If I had a daughter her hair would be too her butt and she would not be allowed to cut it until she was in middle school.  My husband and I agree on this 100%.  Just like my boys have no choice but to keep their hair relatively short and neat at all times (they are 15, 13 & 5).  If they want it long like a girls then they can wait till they are 18. 


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lazyd
by Member on May. 4, 2012 at 7:54 PM

I say if the child is old enough to make the decision on their own!  (I think thats usually about 4 or 5).  It is THEIR hair.  If it was a girl and she cut it all off, I know society would make fun of her, but she would have to be told that and deal with it.  If it was a boy and he grew it out to his butt, society would make fun of him, but he would have to be told that and deal with it.  It's just hair!  It grows back (for most people). 

myhandsomelove
by on May. 4, 2012 at 8:44 PM

if the he needs a haircut what does it really matter who takes him? im not gonna fight with my hubby( if we ever get divorced) about a hair cut.......its hair it will grow back......

fullxbusymom
by Bronze Member on May. 4, 2012 at 8:58 PM

Well since my oldest is 15 and he doesn't have a problem with our rules I am pretty certain we did just fine but thanks.  Also we are not control freaks we pick our battles trust me, it isn't controling every aspect of their life but one single topic.  So how do you know I am controling every aspect of their lives or not you don't know our family or even any of our rules except one?

Also we have 4 kids all boys and since we are done it won't be something we will be dealing with anyways.  But if you had bothered to read my first post I also said by middle school they could make the decision for themselves if we had a daughter and until then I would try and come up with a compromise that worked for them and us.  However, thanks for the advice and judgment.

Quoting danie24:

You and your husband are ridiculous control freaks. Good luck with that.

Quoting fullxbusymom:

Yes she would have to have it long.  We may compromise to the middle of her back but little girls in my opinion should have long hair and my husband 100% agrees with me.  It is my decision as the parent just like my boys can't opt to have long hair while under our roof either. 


Quoting atlmom2:

Wow, my dd had super short hair until high school because that is what she wanted.  What if your dd didn't want long hair?  You would make her anyway???  This is why its not about the parents, its about the child.  Making them happy.  My dh would never and has never cared about our girls hair and they are 21 and 18.  It was never discussed. 


Quoting fullxbusymom:

Sorry but if there is joint custody both parents must agree or it doesn't happen.  I can totally see the big deal some say it is just hair to me it is so much more than that.

If I had a daughter her hair would be too her butt and she would not be allowed to cut it until she was in middle school.  My husband and I agree on this 100%.  Just like my boys have no choice but to keep their hair relatively short and neat at all times (they are 15, 13 & 5).  If they want it long like a girls then they can wait till they are 18. 




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