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I just can't be friends with any mom.

I swear, WTF is wrong with people today? My one friend doesn't know how to strap her kid into a car seat and gets offended if I say something, my other friend smokes around her kids, another one leaves them in the minivan(in the driveway at home i should add, which to me doesn't matter but to her it does) because they're asleep and doesn't want to wake them. What the hell??? I'm not going to have any friends at this rate. I CANNOT keep my mouth shut about such things. Should I just move into a cave somewhere?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on May. 20, 2012 at 8:11 PM
Replies (31-40):
nodramamama311
by on May. 20, 2012 at 9:58 PM
Oh no, I get what you mean. I recently had an issue with my own sister and something she had done with her kids, BUT, the difference is I can say stuff to her and she doesn't get all bent out of shape about it. Damn, she says stuff to me too. That's where the maturity I'm looking for in others comes into question. My sister is a damn good mom who sometimes does things I KNOW are not entirely safe. I tell her, she's say ok, and we move on. AND also she will at least think about what I've said because she knows I'm not just trying to be a bitch. Why can't we all be like that with each other?


Quoting Punkie74:

That is exactly what I am asking. What is safe and unsafe is NOT cut and dry. Just because you feel something is unsafe doesn't mean everyone will agree with you. I have plenty of friends that allow their children to do things I wouldn't allow my children to do because I consider it unsafe. I don't however terminate my friendships over it because doing so is honestly pointless. It would only accomplish me sitting home on my ass alone bored off my ass because no one can start my constant critisism on how they are suppose to raise their child.



Quoting nodramamama311:

I will explain anything I can, I'm not sure what you mean though.


Are you asking if my friendship ensures safety to another mom? If so then of course not, thats ridiculous. I can only see what I see. If I see something I know is unsafe for a child, wouldn't it make me a shitty human if I didn't say anything?






Quoting Punkie74:

I notice you opted not to explain how not being friends with them ensures or even improves safety for the child.







Quoting nodramamama311:

Safety is not an opinion. I can't even believe someone would think that it is.










Quoting Punkie74:

What you feel is safe and what others feel is safe is a difference of opinion. Now please explain to me how not being friends with someone will ensure their child's safety....











Quoting nodramamama311:

OMG IM NOT PICKING ON WHATS RIGHT OR WRONG, iM PICKING ON SAFETY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






How can safety be black and white!?!?!?






If you want to feed your kids sugar, fine, if you want to teach them a certain religion, fine, IM TALKING ABOUT SAFETY ISSUES. WHY CAN'T ANY OF YOU GET THAT???














Quoting Punkie74:

Yes you will be friendless forever if you choose to criticize every choice others make that don't coincide with what you feel is right.




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Punkie74
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:14 PM
Because people in general are defensive of their choices. Have you considered it may be in your delivery of the information? Not everyone knows you aren't simply trying to be a know it all bitch just as not everyone will agree with what you feel is safe. The best you can do with people is convey your thoughts that gives them something to think about and move on. Not being friends with someone or dwelling on their choices doesn't accomplish anything but you having no friends.

Quoting nodramamama311:

Oh no, I get what you mean. I recently had an issue with my own sister and something she had done with her kids, BUT, the difference is I can say stuff to her and she doesn't get all bent out of shape about it. Damn, she says stuff to me too. That's where the maturity I'm looking for in others comes into question. My sister is a damn good mom who sometimes does things I KNOW are not entirely safe. I tell her, she's say ok, and we move on. AND also she will at least think about what I've said because she knows I'm not just trying to be a bitch. Why can't we all be like that with each other?




Quoting Punkie74:

That is exactly what I am asking. What is safe and unsafe is NOT cut and dry. Just because you feel something is unsafe doesn't mean everyone will agree with you. I have plenty of friends that allow their children to do things I wouldn't allow my children to do because I consider it unsafe. I don't however terminate my friendships over it because doing so is honestly pointless. It would only accomplish me sitting home on my ass alone bored off my ass because no one can start my constant critisism on how they are suppose to raise their child.





Quoting nodramamama311:

I will explain anything I can, I'm not sure what you mean though.



Are you asking if my friendship ensures safety to another mom? If so then of course not, thats ridiculous. I can only see what I see. If I see something I know is unsafe for a child, wouldn't it make me a shitty human if I didn't say anything?








Quoting Punkie74:

I notice you opted not to explain how not being friends with them ensures or even improves safety for the child.









Quoting nodramamama311:

Safety is not an opinion. I can't even believe someone would think that it is.












Quoting Punkie74:

What you feel is safe and what others feel is safe is a difference of opinion. Now please explain to me how not being friends with someone will ensure their child's safety....













Quoting nodramamama311:

OMG IM NOT PICKING ON WHATS RIGHT OR WRONG, iM PICKING ON SAFETY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







How can safety be black and white!?!?!?







If you want to feed your kids sugar, fine, if you want to teach them a certain religion, fine, IM TALKING ABOUT SAFETY ISSUES. WHY CAN'T ANY OF YOU GET THAT???
















Quoting Punkie74:

Yes you will be friendless forever if you choose to criticize every choice others make that don't coincide with what you feel is right.




Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:19 PM
I get what you're saying. I just don't have the patience for people who can't think maturely. Now let me say, I AM NOT THE MOST MATURE MOM ON EARTH, I KNOW THAT. I just think that certain things should be allowed to be said without someone's little feeling being hurt, especially if they are being said out of pure concern for a child's well being.


Quoting Punkie74:

Because people in general are defensive of their choices. Have you considered it may be in your delivery of the information? Not everyone knows you aren't simply trying to be a know it all bitch just as not everyone will agree with what you feel is safe. The best you can do with people is convey your thoughts that gives them something to think about and move on. Not being friends with someone or dwelling on their choices doesn't accomplish anything but you having no friends.



Quoting nodramamama311:

Oh no, I get what you mean. I recently had an issue with my own sister and something she had done with her kids, BUT, the difference is I can say stuff to her and she doesn't get all bent out of shape about it. Damn, she says stuff to me too. That's where the maturity I'm looking for in others comes into question. My sister is a damn good mom who sometimes does things I KNOW are not entirely safe. I tell her, she's say ok, and we move on. AND also she will at least think about what I've said because she knows I'm not just trying to be a bitch. Why can't we all be like that with each other?






Quoting Punkie74:

That is exactly what I am asking. What is safe and unsafe is NOT cut and dry. Just because you feel something is unsafe doesn't mean everyone will agree with you. I have plenty of friends that allow their children to do things I wouldn't allow my children to do because I consider it unsafe. I don't however terminate my friendships over it because doing so is honestly pointless. It would only accomplish me sitting home on my ass alone bored off my ass because no one can start my constant critisism on how they are suppose to raise their child.







Quoting nodramamama311:

I will explain anything I can, I'm not sure what you mean though.




Are you asking if my friendship ensures safety to another mom? If so then of course not, thats ridiculous. I can only see what I see. If I see something I know is unsafe for a child, wouldn't it make me a shitty human if I didn't say anything?










Quoting Punkie74:

I notice you opted not to explain how not being friends with them ensures or even improves safety for the child.











Quoting nodramamama311:

Safety is not an opinion. I can't even believe someone would think that it is.














Quoting Punkie74:

What you feel is safe and what others feel is safe is a difference of opinion. Now please explain to me how not being friends with someone will ensure their child's safety....















Quoting nodramamama311:

OMG IM NOT PICKING ON WHATS RIGHT OR WRONG, iM PICKING ON SAFETY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!








How can safety be black and white!?!?!?








If you want to feed your kids sugar, fine, if you want to teach them a certain religion, fine, IM TALKING ABOUT SAFETY ISSUES. WHY CAN'T ANY OF YOU GET THAT???


















Quoting Punkie74:

Yes you will be friendless forever if you choose to criticize every choice others make that don't coincide with what you feel is right.





Posted on CafeMom Mobile
MommyOfOne2710
by Member on May. 20, 2012 at 10:22 PM
I find your screen name ironic after reading through all the replies.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
lilpep100
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:25 PM
1 mom liked this
What the heck? Leaving kids in the car asleep? Here in TX they could die of heat stroke. I let mine stay napping in the car once or twice when it was nice out. Car was in the car port, windows down, and I stay outside in my lawn chair next to the car waiting until it was time to get back in the car and pick up the older one. Sometimes I stayed in the car with the windows down with her. If it's hot, we went inside, and she fussed.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:32 PM
Why? Why is it drama to discuss an important issue? We haven't called names or cussed each other out. How is this drama?


Quoting MommyOfOne2710:

I find your screen name ironic after reading through all the replies.

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Sarah961
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:45 PM
2 moms liked this

 If they won't listen to good advice then at least know that you did your part to warn them.

kitty8199
by on May. 20, 2012 at 10:49 PM
1 mom liked this
What if you saw something you knew was not safe and didnt say anything. Then something happened and the child was hurt or killed.
Then you hear mom saying "i didnt know that could happen".
What would you think then? "Oh well, not my kid". I would never want to be in a place that made me think "i should`ve said something".
They dont have to listen, I dont preach, but I do mention things, just in case they dont know it isnt safe. I have a friend who didnt know car seats expired. It was mentioned in passing. She checked her seats and had to replace one. She was thankful I said that.


Quoting atlmom2:

No, never.  I police my own children which are raised just fine and are 18 and 21 how. 


Quoting nodramamama311:

I feel like no one understands me. I don't want to police anyone. I don't drive around looking for shit. If I see something that's unsafe though shouldn't I say something? If your best friend was doing somethinf unsafe with her kids wouldn't you say something??





Quoting atlmom2:

Whatever, I am not a nazi for someone else.  I bet you have friends wish you would shut up and mind our own business.  You are not their parents, they are.  I am not the worlds police and you are not either even though it seems you want to be. 



Quoting nodramamama311:

Your last sentence makes my blood boil. Not at you personally but it just amazes me at the passiveness that humans have come accustomed to. It really makes me sick actually.








Quoting atlmom2:

My girls are older and when they were young most kids of any size at 3 years old were in seat belts only.  Hell, I never was in a car seat ever.  I just don't think I would or ever will be a car seat nazi even for my grandchildren.  Its their life, its their kids. 








Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on May. 20, 2012 at 11:12 PM
It's a wonder how people can't tell the difference between concern and bullshit.


Quoting Sarah961:

 If they won't listen to good advice then at least know that you did your part to warn them.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
TateTwo
by on May. 21, 2012 at 8:20 AM

this

Quoting tarakay0417:

 I wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut either if my friends did that crap.


~~ Nita
http://tatetwo.blogspot.com
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