When the baby is hungry, she'll wake up and start to fuss. Waking up and starting to fuss is their way of telling you they either need a diaper change or food or amusement. You DON"T wake up someone, including a baby, to insist they eat or to offer them food. There is NO danger that a baby isn't going to let you know they're hungry and keep seeking food till they are satisfied. If they're sleeping, their body wants sleep, not food. If they're fussing, offer them food if they've not eaten in a while and see if that's what they want. And if that's not what they want, then also make sure they have a clean diaper. And if they've eaten, have a clean diaper, and are still fussing, rock with them, pace with them, sing to them. That's really the big 3 of their day and night, over and over again.
This is pretty basic. You are earnestly trying to do the right thing for your baby, and it sounds like you need more info. Google to find free new mom groups in your area, so that you can get together at least once a week with other moms, with their babies, and talk about how it's going. When you go, find one mom you like who also seems really competent and ask if you could call her if you ever have a question, and get her number. Cafemom isn't a venue sufficient for all the info you're gonna need.
I would talk to her pediatrician. Babies need their sleep but they also need their calories. Her pediatrician can tell you whats best.
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