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The Cafe The Cafe

my mother called me a bad mother *piog*

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post
I had my kids christmas toys in layaway. As I was looking at my receipt I realized I went completely overboard. So I started looking on ebay, craigslist, and amazon. I found everything I had in layaway, for really cheaper. So I talked to my mother, and told her I was going to walmart today to pay on their layaway, then return everything and just get their things from where I found them.

She went nuts, told me we never had a christmas with used toys. Why am I wanting to do it to my kids just to be cheap?! I'm going to be spending the same amount anyway once I buy the boxes to put the used toys in. So why not stop being a cheap ass and give my kids the toys.

Every year I shop big for my kids, I save all year for christmas toys. But now I just feel silly paying so much for 10 toys per kid($400, 2 kids). When I can spend less money and maybe get more toys and clothes. I havent even bought them any winter/spring clothes yet. Which will most likely be another $200-$300 mainly because of my dd and all her accessories. My sons easier to shop for except for shoes. So my question is. Do you think its wrong for a mother to give her kids used toys and clothes for christmas? Would you ever do it? Money isn't tight for me, but my ex doesn't help with our kids financially so im on my own. I like to have a house full of toys and clothes for them each year mainly for my own selfishness. So thats why I'm asking.
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 23, 2012 at 8:51 AM
Replies (11-20):
Autumn22
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 12:38 PM
I have bought used in the past. Just depends on my money situation at the time! This year I was able to buy all new though. :)
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grannie_kel
by Bronze Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 2:54 PM

I have never given used for Christmas but kids usually are not going to know the difference between new and good used until they are older and are going to appreciate getting more.  If your mom has a problem with it, let it be her problem, not yours. 

I used to work with a girl whose husband was so cheap, they always waited until after Christmas to have their  Christmas so she could go shopping the day after when everything is on sale.   I thought that was a little tacky but perhaps just because I didn't care for him.  When she had her second child, he made her go back to work after 3 weeks...and she had had a C-section! 

afwifeandmommy3
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 2:55 PM


Quoting Nathans_mom0612:

I dont think you are a bad mom, but i wouldnt give used toys for christmas.
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GertieK
by Silver Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 4:22 PM

I have given used toys for Christmas, and did it for years.  The kids were little and never knew the difference.  We were so poor it was the only way they would get anything at all.  Making Christmas all about the toys was something we tried very hard to avoid.  Just as Jesus received 3 gifts from the wisemen, they always received 3 gifts each.  Made it much more simple, and took the emphasis away from MONEY MONEY MONEY - MONEY.  We did crafts, and they made each other presents.  We had several years early on, and have done the same thing fairly recently, where we drew names and the only gifts we gave each other were hand made.  Your mom needs to step away from saying stuff like that.  Pretty insulting if you ask me, as well as arrogant.

Paperfishies
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 4:25 PM
I don't buy anything used, it's a personal preference. Do what you need to do.
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gavs4boys
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 5:25 PM

It's not about the price tag.  If you want to save money and the toys are in great shape then get them.  I would and have gotten my kids used toys.  A few years ago I was in a bad spot and couldn't afford new toys for my kids so everything they got was donated used toys.  Guess what???? They didn't care.  They were excited to have presents.  Kids don't care about the price (well not unless they are spoiled rotten brats).  Don't feel bad.  If your mom has such a huge problem with it then tell her to buy everything brand new.  Oh yeah I just got legos off ebay today used for my boys for christmas.

CountryLayne
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 6:14 PM

You just tell your mother if she is that anal about buying used toys as gifts, then SHE can go spend the wad of money on new ones. People can be so ignorant about things. There is nothing wrong with used toys- in the end the kids don't care, and they end up with a Christmas. Times are tough for almost everyone, and sometimes you just do what you have to do. Don't let her get you down.


vig5179
by on Nov. 23, 2012 at 6:32 PM

Lots of Christmas stuff I give is "used". And not because I'm trying to go cheap. I look through swap shops, yard sales, resale stores, antique stores(yep antiques are used), and internet because I can usually find something unique that each person actually loves not just something they can get anytime they're in town.

There is nothing wrong with it. Price tags are just something to brag on. Used doesn't mean broken and filthy, it just means not from store. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:09 PM
I would have divorced him. Sorry that's not only cheap but its dangerous to her. How did she get a release from her doctor so soon? I didn't get my staples out until 3 weeks and doctor refused to release me before 8 weeks.

Quoting grannie_kel:

I have never given used for Christmas but kids usually are not going to know the difference between new and good used until they are older and are going to appreciate getting more.  If your mom has a problem with it, let it be her problem, not yours. 

I used to work with a girl whose husband was so cheap, they always waited until after Christmas to have their  Christmas so she could go shopping the day after when everything is on sale.   I thought that was a little tacky but perhaps just because I didn't care for him.  When she had her second child, he made her go back to work after 3 weeks...and she had had a C-section! 

grannie_kel
by Bronze Member on Nov. 23, 2012 at 7:36 PM

His uncle was the doctor who gave the release.   We were working at the time for a physician, an ENT doc who should've known better but as long as she had the clearance to come back to work and wanted to, he couldn't do anything about it.  You had your staples in for 3 weeks?  Usually they come out within 3 to 5 days, most often before the new mom leaves the hospital to go home. 

Quoting Anonymous:

I would have divorced him. Sorry that's not only cheap but its dangerous to her. How did she get a release from her doctor so soon? I didn't get my staples out until 3 weeks and doctor refused to release me before 8 weeks.

Quoting grannie_kel:

I have never given used for Christmas but kids usually are not going to know the difference between new and good used until they are older and are going to appreciate getting more.  If your mom has a problem with it, let it be her problem, not yours. 

I used to work with a girl whose husband was so cheap, they always waited until after Christmas to have their  Christmas so she could go shopping the day after when everything is on sale.   I thought that was a little tacky but perhaps just because I didn't care for him.  When she had her second child, he made her go back to work after 3 weeks...and she had had a C-section! 


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