Advice: I disliked Christmas present from husband... and he's not taking it well.
- 89 Replies
I am a bit confused as to what to do.
A little background story: my husband is into gadgets. I am not. Never have I been fond of fads or gadgets. I am more onto the practical side of things. I use what I need and, what I don't, I either give to someone who needs it or simply don't buy it. This is especially true for expensive gadgets.
My husband, on the other hand, likes all the new fad of touch-screen tablets and phones. He can't wait for the latest 3D TV to come out or the latest camera because he is either researching it or trying to get it (when he has a perfectly good flat screen TV or a two-year old camera he rarely ever uses. Anyways... that's how he is.)
In my case, I don't have time nor the use for those things. Those are the kind of things that collect dust in my closet, so to speak. I am busy with my kids, with the house or doing my own things to be preocuppied with what I call 'stuff.'
Well, for weeks now, my husband had been insisting that I use one of his computers (an ipad.) So, I did and hated it. I am not into touch-screen computers. I like a good keyboard and good speed. That's all I need and I already have a good laptop that works perfectly for me. And this is what I told my husband: 'I don't like it and I am happy with what I have. I do not want another computer.'
Well, come Christmas Day, he hands me a small present. To my surprise, it's an ipad mini. Not what I expected. Something I had told him was too gimmicky for me. I thought that was clear when he saw it on TV when it first came out. Around Thanksgiving Day I gave him my Christmas list... basically 'this is what I like and where you can get it' (I even gave him the codes, seriously, so that he wouldn't have a hard time finding them - concert tickets, 2 perfume choices, 2 books, and 3 sweaters,,, he could choose from any of it.)
When I opened the present, I thanked him as gracefully as I could... however, I made the mistake of asking him if he had kept the receipt so that I could return it. He got very annoyed and later angry with me for not liking this present. Where did I make the mistake? Was I too honest? Funny enough, he always tells me that he likes my sense of honesty with him, that he wished more people were like that.
The way I saw it: I had already stated plainly that I don't like this kind of things. I tried to make him understand that it was like giving me a motorcycle when I don't even like biking. He just didn't get it and he's still very angry at me. What can I do? I am confused as to what to do and can't understand his anger... His solution: he will never give me a gift again. The truth: this is his first bad present and he's taking it very badly. Shouldn't I be the one who is disappointed because he didn't listen to what I said? Any advice?
I understand what you mean BUT I think you should've just accepted the gift and been done with it. He's maybe just trying to show you and get you into some of the things he is interested in.
Quoting friendlymom5:
Say thank you and learn to use it.
Sounds like he put a lot of thought into it, and really didn't want to get you something that you gave him instructions to buy. Maybe next year, make him a list of things you DON'T want, instead of what you do want. I, for one, would have loved the gift, and I am not that "techy". But, I am also like you, and would probably not have any clue how to use it.
Good luck, and I hope you both make up.
If you have the money to spare, and this wouldn't be considered putting you in a tight financial spot, I'd just leave it in it's packaging on my dresser. I wouldn't have even said anything until later, maybe if he brought it up, or at least wait until another day.
I wouldn't have said anything on Christmas. I think the timing of saying something was poor.
To be honest, I haven't returned any gifts my husband got me. I agree with EireLass' comment if it doesn't cause financial hardship. Or I might even try to enjoy the iPad mini. Personally, I'm not a huge fan of Apple products, but I do like having a tablet. He might have given it to you as an attempt to get you to like some of the same things.
Don't judge ADHD if you don't understand it!!!
