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Is this just immaturity or what?

Posted by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 4:12 AM
  • 16 Replies

 Ok, I'll try to make this short... 

My dh has a dd from a previous marriage, she is now 21.  We haven't seen her in 6 years, her choice since she was 18, her mother before that.  So extremely strained relationship.  It doesn't help that she is 850 miles away. We were talking to her a few days before Christmas and she said we were gonna be grandparents, she did a home test and it was positive.  The week following that she went to the dr to have a blood test done to confirm.   According to her last period she would be 6 months along.  She had her first dr appt today, and yes they estimate her to be 6 months along.  So she has gone 6 months with no prenatal care, she was drinking up until the pregnancy was confirmed, she knew she was pregnant 5 months ago when she didn't get her period, then when she started gaining weight...  She dropped out of college a year ago, doesn't have a job so she's at home living with mommy who is taking care of her 100%, she is not with the father, which happens.  The father goes by the name P. Funky I'm yet to understand that one, why would you even want to get involved with someone that has given himself that 'name'?  Asked her if she was excited and she said no, the only good thing about this is that I don't have a period.  Being pregnant sucks and having to take care of the kid is gonna suck even more, her words!!  I just don't get any of it...  I'm at a total loss...  I think we would be excited if it weren't for all this things, but with them its sooooo hard to be.

by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 4:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 16, 2013 at 4:21 AM
So sorry....I really feel for that baby.
swthrt737
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 4:38 AM
1 mom liked this
She needs your help more than ever besides the fact that she's excited about having no periods[it's not immaturity]but she said that to comfort herself bse the task awaiting her is huge and tough but the truth is,she needs help and advice on how to handle her new life.
111112
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:10 AM
Ime relly sorry to hear that ..sounds like this child needs some one to show her the way she gonna need alot of guidence and a shoulder to cry on.hope you have the time and understanding to deal with her
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LaughingTattoo
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:15 AM

Sounds like she hasnt had a chance for it to sink in. And that she hasnt let it sink in. For gods sake, the dudes name is P Funky.....like hes gonna help her. And that has to be something thats hitting her now. Keep your ears open and shoulder ready. This girl has a lot of growing up to do in a short time. She will need all the help she can get. Try not to judge her actions and count her out already....she needs time.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:27 AM
She will probably have a fetal alcohol baby who could have lasting effects their whole life. All 21 yo's are not like her. Mine works, goes to school and saved up 14,000 working part time for a car. And takes the pill to prevent an unwanted pregnancy. This baby doesn't have a chance.
GertieK
by Silver Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:34 AM

Has anyone suggested adoption?  With the girl's mom obviously doing a crappy job raising her, and her being so obviously self-centered, that sweet baby will have no chance.  Your story is so sad.

MomofHDFandNWF
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:44 AM

That was my first thought as well.... hopefully for the sake of the baby, the 21 yo can do a lot of growing up in a short period of time OR she truly puts the needs of her baby before her own and considers adoption.  

Quoting GertieK:

Has anyone suggested adoption?  With the girl's mom obviously doing a crappy job raising her, and her being so obviously self-centered, that sweet baby will have no chance.  Your story is so sad.


Brieonna286
by on Jan. 16, 2013 at 8:50 AM
I agree gun, I know you said she won't give the baby up, I think she's just looking at this baby as an object not a human that she is responsible for. Her mother did a horrible job raising her, still is and now she'll have her claws dug into this poor innocent child. I'm sure she'll screw up the babies life too. I am so sorry,just remember I'm always here for ya! I'll keep praying for all of you, with a special prayer for the baby.

Quoting GertieK:

Has anyone suggested adoption?  With the girl's mom obviously doing a crappy job raising her, and her being so obviously self-centered, that sweet baby will have no chance.  Your story is so sad.

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mamakin616
by Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 9:16 AM

She sounds like a selfish spolied brat...I know being pregnant isn't all that fun for most woman ..but to make such rude childish statements about her own child is just plain immature ...and I bet her mother will end up taking care of this baby.

lapcounter
by Gold Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 10:40 AM

Sounds like she will be an outstanding parent, I really feel sorry for that baby.

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