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Oppositional Defiant Disorder? Suuuuuure...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 194 Replies
5 moms liked this

A friend of mine just told me that her kid was labeled with ODD. I asked what that was and she told me Oppositional Defiant Disorder. Then she told me the symptoms and I thought, isn't that ALL 5 year olds? Don't ALL 5 year olds have issues listening and doing what they're told?

Her kid is the biggest brat I've ever met, but in my opinion, he's that way because of her. She's always let him do whatever he wants and says things like, "Now, __, we don't pull hair." She should've been saying, "DO NOT PULL HAIR!" Now she wants him to listen do what she says but he reacts with anger.

Well, DUH! She let him do whatever he wanted for 5 years and now she's trying to take back control from him and he isn't happy with that. So rather than admit she's at fault for failing to discipline him his whole life until now, she had to have him diagnosed. Now, suddenly, he can't help it, it's nobody's fault, and everyone is a victim.

OF COURSE. 

Do you believe ODD is a real thing or just an excuse for poor parenting?

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 11, 2013 at 8:37 AM
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Replies (1-10):
acrogodess
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 8:46 AM
26 moms liked this
If he is only that way with his mother, then, no, it is not ODD. Children who really have ODD can be spanked, put in time out, yelled at, get suspended from school, be faced with juvi or jail time, have things taken away and they do not care about the consequences. Their defiance against authority is against ALL authority. It is a very real disorder, but children who don't have it are being diagnosed with it.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 11, 2013 at 8:46 AM
4 moms liked this
It does exist, but of course, some are brats and parents just do not discipline. Your friend is a lazy parent it sounds like.
GertieK
by Silver Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 8:55 AM
21 moms liked this

Odd how all these "disorders" are suddenly appearing.  Yes, there are kids with real problems, but good grief.  I am one of those old school moms who would have taken care of the situation a long time ago with a few trips to the wood shed.  I definitely would have hurt more than his feelings.

mcginnisc
by Bronze Member on Apr. 11, 2013 at 9:08 AM
7 moms liked this

ODD is *very* real. It is present in many adopted children. I did a ton of research about attachment disorders before we adopted our oldest dd. ODD is considered in the attachment disorder category. It is seen in many children that are adopted internationally, which is one reason I did a lot of reserach about it. Our daughter is adopted from China and thankfully has not shown any signs of attachment disorders in 6 years. I do have friends that have children with ODD and RAD. It is found in bio children as well.

So, yes..it is real..of course, there are just bratty munchkins as well. :-) 

 

Claire


" I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13 

CherrieFaeries
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 10:41 AM
4 moms liked this

ODD has been around for at least the last decade.

Quoting GertieK:

Odd how all these "disorders" are suddenly appearing.  Yes, there are kids with real problems, but good grief.  I am one of those old school moms who would have taken care of the situation a long time ago with a few trips to the wood shed.  I definitely would have hurt more than his feelings.

It is very real, but there is a difference between being a spoiled brat and having ODD. Children with ODD can be down right terrifying from what I've heard. They don't care who they defy. They have no respect for authority at all, no matter where it comes from. AND a good beating from the wood shed or anywhere else isn't going to fix anything with them. They don't care.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 11, 2013 at 11:33 AM
1 mom liked this

See, and that's how he is - only bad with her, not everyone else. Thank you for clarifying!


Quoting acrogodess:

If he is only that way with his mother, then, no, it is not ODD. Children who really have ODD can be spanked, put in time out, yelled at, get suspended from school, be faced with juvi or jail time, have things taken away and they do not care about the consequences. Their defiance against authority is against ALL authority. It is a very real disorder, but children who don't have it are being diagnosed with it.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 11, 2013 at 11:34 AM
1 mom liked this

That makes sense. I think hers is just a brat, though.


Quoting mcginnisc:

ODD is *very* real. It is present in many adopted children. I did a ton of research about attachment disorders before we adopted our oldest dd. ODD is considered in the attachment disorder category. It is seen in many children that are adopted internationally, which is one reason I did a lot of reserach about it. Our daughter is adopted from China and thankfully has not shown any signs of attachment disorders in 6 years. I do have friends that have children with ODD and RAD. It is found in bio children as well.

So, yes..it is real..of course, there are just bratty munchkins as well. :-) 




Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 11, 2013 at 12:11 PM
12 moms liked this

ODD is an ongoing pattern of anger guided disobedience, hostilely defiant behavior toward authority figures which goes beyond the bounds of normal childhood behavior. (Key words)

They don't care, there is never that switch, where they say Oh this is bad, like normal kids do. Children like this tend to be very spiteful and will seek revenge when they feel they have been wronged. ODD can be caused by environmental factors as well as genetic factors. Many parents (especially new parents) are not sure how to deal with the unruly child correctly. So they will reinforce the bad behavior (most times unintentionally). Most of the time therapy will help to correct the behavior.

It is very real. I would assume that you don't know what goes on in these peoples daily lives, or what steps the mother has taken to try and fix the problems. I would say that the mother has taken a step forward to helping her son before things get out of hand. I have seen and dealt teens with ODD and it is hell!

I would also say that you are a shitty friend and should probably educate yourself on the facts before you try to put a person down.

Marimaru
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 12:42 PM
3 moms liked this

I imagine it's real.  But I also believe that it's probably overdiagnosed, like many things.  Or that even if the diagnosis is true, discipline is still the right answer.

Momof697
by on Apr. 11, 2013 at 12:57 PM

I have heard of it before but I am still out on whether or not it is real. I think it is moms who want control back because they let it go to the child for too long.  But I have heard one lady I know in person say it is a real disorder and she did foster care so she could have seen it.

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