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The Cafe The Cafe

Caught my 11yo SEXTING!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 163 Replies

So, before you go there, I didn't give the 11yo a phone, his father did (we've been divorced 3yrs), and I'm not happy he has it and uses it all the damned time to start with, but this latest incident really takes the cake.

We were at the breakfast table this morning and he had his phone in his hand, as usual, and I told him there's no texting at the table, as usual. He says, "But, Mom, I've got to finish this text. It's important."

I said, "JR, you're ELEVEN. No text is so important at ELEVEN years old that you can't wait until after breakfast to send it. He groaned and set the phone aside but kept reaching for it. I finally had enough after the 3rd reminder and snatched it from him. A text came in and some girl sent him a picture of herself in her bra! She looks like she's his age, too, so the fact she's sending pics of herself in her bra to some boy at that age scares me as much as what I saw JR was sending to her. He swears he hasn't ever sexted before and he's never sent pics to her, but he's always lying to me so I really don't trust what he's telling me (his dad said it's okay to lie to me because I'm a girl and wouldn't understand what it's like to be a tween boy).

Anyway, I took the phone away and called his dad whose reply was, "That's my boy." I'm like, "What? He's ELEVEN! This is NOT okay!" Then I found out who the girl was who was texting and told her mother, who's a friend of mine, and she's coming over tonight so we can discuss things and find out what else these two might have been doing.

What would YOU do in this situation?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 12, 2013 at 12:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lucky2Beeme
by Silver Member on Jun. 12, 2013 at 12:40 PM
8 moms liked this

take the phone. explain how dangerous it is to be texting and tell him he will get the phone back after you get EX to take texting feature off it.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 12, 2013 at 12:43 PM
14 moms liked this
Take the phone. 11 yo do not need a phone. Your ex needs to be called out big time. "That's my boy" is gonna get you a grandchild way too young.
gurlygurl0724
by New Member on Jun. 12, 2013 at 12:45 PM
7 moms liked this
Exactly what you did...but I would definitely take away his cell phone until I feel he is older and more responsible...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:01 PM

 take the phone.

EireLass
by Ruby Member on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:05 PM
7 moms liked this

I would remove all electronic communications from him. I would explain that it's because he doesn't know how to behave with them. I would also not allow him to go anywhere except school, with the explanation that he doesn't know how to behave with people. He'll learn.....

ReadWriteLuv
by Casey on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:06 PM
3 moms liked this
Why are both your son and this girl sexualized at 11? What is wrong with this little girl's self esteem that she feels she needs to do that at 11, and what on earth is your husband teaching your son that he feels that it's ok to be sexual at 11?
EarlGrayHot
by on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:10 PM
1 mom liked this

Take the phone.  His dad is a jerk to say that and think it's ok.  Plus, it does sound as if he's using it way too much.

GertieK
by Silver Member on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:14 PM
3 moms liked this

And if he and the girl were to get together... they would not have to worry about her being pregnant because now that 11 yo girl can trot herself down to the corner store and get the morning after pill... and neither set of parents would ever know.  And if she didn't do that, she can go to PP and get an abortion, once again without parental consent at basically any stage of pregnancy.... courtesy of the US government.   Yes, take the phone and get serious about teaching consequences.  They are children, and our poor kids childhoods are being stolen from them.

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:15 PM
2 moms liked this

I took the phone, had the chat, but ex will NOT remove the texting feature. He's weirdly proud of him for doing this. I don't get it at all but he's NOT getting the phone back.


Quoting lucky2Beeme:

take the phone. explain how dangerous it is to be texting and tell him he will get the phone back after you get EX to take texting feature off it.



Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 12, 2013 at 1:17 PM
1 mom liked this

I have no idea why my son is behaving like this. He wasn't this way before the divorce, but that was 3yrs ago. I don't know the girl that well, just know her mom from work and she's just as confused about her kid doing this as I am about mine. We clearly need to have some more serious discussions with these kids.


Quoting ReadWriteLuv:

Why are both your son and this girl sexualized at 11? What is wrong with this little girl's self esteem that she feels she needs to do that at 11, and what on earth is your husband teaching your son that he feels that it's ok to be sexual at 11?



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