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MY MOTHER IN LAW....AAAAHHH!!!! Total vent!

So Wednesday she gets completely pissed at me, for something that I literally had no control over and tried to explain it to her so she would calm the F down, doesn't talk to me until today and then asks me to go to the rodeo with her. UH NO I DON'T WANT TO GO ANYWERE WITH YOU! She does this all the time. She acts likes a total bitch and then like nothing happened am I'm supposed to just go with the flow. I'm sick of it and I can just hear her now taking to my husband saying " well I'll never invite her anywhere again". I know that's what she's saying because that's exactly how she is. Well GOOD! Lol.

Why do some MIL's think they can act like this and it's supposed to be ok???? Lots of times she's nice and then this, I'm so sick of it! And I have zero family of my own anywhere even remotely close. Ok I'm done
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Jun. 15, 2013 at 6:31 PM
Replies (11-20):
nurse1997
by Silver Member on Jun. 16, 2013 at 12:28 PM

Toxic people !!!

Zanny
by Bronze Member on Jun. 16, 2013 at 4:00 PM
1 mom liked this

It's Ironic your Name on here is NoDramaMama...

EireLass
by Ruby Member on Jun. 16, 2013 at 4:37 PM
Maybe you could take her to lunch sometime, just the 2 of you and you can ask her why she does this and how hurtful it is.
Quoting nodramamama311:

I see what you're saying but I just think its wrong for her to get to act like a bitch, hang up on me sometimes, say rude things about my kids and then go away for a few days then come back and act like nothing happened, no apologies ever or anything. I'm the one who lets it go every time because I don't want there to be trouble between her and my husband. It just seems unfair when all I've ever done is be good to her and her son.

Quoting EireLass:

I don't doubt that she has done this numerous times. Personality traits are long living. But again....she does this and moves on, gets over it. You are the one holding a tight grudge against normal behaviour. Don't you think it's much healthier to get over stupid spats and move forward?

People create their own limits.

Quoting nodramamama311:

Well I can see how you'd gather that from the little bit of info you have on our nearly 6 year relationship as DIL/MIL. You are severely lacking on info though, completely at my fault though. If I wrote all of our history in one post it would be WAY too long. Lets just say she's done this kind of thing more than a handful of times and this is possibly the one and only time I've ever said no to her to going somewhere with her. Also I've always let it go and acted like her when she acts like nothing happened. People have their limits though, wouldn't you agree?

Quoting EireLass:

You 2 had a spat, she got over it and invited you to an outing. You refuse to do anything with her.

Quoting nodramamama311:

How can I be one who holds grudges when she's ALWAYS welcome in our home no matter how she acts? I NEVER speak rudely to her in person or on the phone no matter how she's treated me prior.


Quoting EireLass:

Sounds like she gets over things and you hold grudges.


nodramamama311
by on Jun. 16, 2013 at 5:43 PM
Why is venting drama? I'm venting about something that happens to me at least once a month. I don't cause it. Am I not allowed to vent without someone accusing me of drama?

Quoting Zanny:

It's Ironic your Name on here is NoDramaMama...

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on Jun. 16, 2013 at 5:44 PM
I've never tried talking to her about it because I've never thought she'd be receptive. Guess I could tru before I assume.

Quoting EireLass:

Maybe you could take her to lunch sometime, just the 2 of you and you can ask her why she does this and how hurtful it is.

Quoting nodramamama311:

I see what you're saying but I just think its wrong for her to get to act like a bitch, hang up on me sometimes, say rude things about my kids and then go away for a few days then come back and act like nothing happened, no apologies ever or anything. I'm the one who lets it go every time because I don't want there to be trouble between her and my husband. It just seems unfair when all I've ever done is be good to her and her son.



Quoting EireLass:

I don't doubt that she has done this numerous times. Personality traits are long living. But again....she does this and moves on, gets over it. You are the one holding a tight grudge against normal behaviour. Don't you think it's much healthier to get over stupid spats and move forward?

People create their own limits.

Quoting nodramamama311:

Well I can see how you'd gather that from the little bit of info you have on our nearly 6 year relationship as DIL/MIL. You are severely lacking on info though, completely at my fault though. If I wrote all of our history in one post it would be WAY too long. Lets just say she's done this kind of thing more than a handful of times and this is possibly the one and only time I've ever said no to her to going somewhere with her. Also I've always let it go and acted like her when she acts like nothing happened. People have their limits though, wouldn't you agree?


Quoting EireLass:

You 2 had a spat, she got over it and invited you to an outing. You refuse to do anything with her.

Quoting nodramamama311:

How can I be one who holds grudges when she's ALWAYS welcome in our home no matter how she acts? I NEVER speak rudely to her in person or on the phone no matter how she's treated me prior.



Quoting EireLass:

Sounds like she gets over things and you hold grudges.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
nodramamama311
by on Jun. 16, 2013 at 11:18 PM
So she gets to be rude and mean to me and I have to get over it? No apology ever and I need to get over it? Blaming me for something I had no control over and I have to get over it? Hmm, interesting point of view.

Quoting Cindy18:

Over what you just descibed above, IMO, you need to get over it. Sounds to me like a personality issue and that's something you are not going to chamge. She didn't insult you or your family, it wasn't even about you. Some people just need to walk away and when on the phone, hanging up is the only way.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Cindy18
by Bronze Member on Jun. 17, 2013 at 6:27 AM

It's her problem, not yours. She is the one that is worked up over a misprint. You are giving her power by letting it upset you. Your choice but I wouldn't let it bother me so much.

Quoting nodramamama311:

So she gets to be rude and mean to me and I have to get over it? No apology ever and I need to get over it? Blaming me for something I had no control over and I have to get over it? Hmm, interesting point of view.

Quoting Cindy18:

Over what you just descibed above, IMO, you need to get over it. Sounds to me like a personality issue and that's something you are not going to chamge. She didn't insult you or your family, it wasn't even about you. Some people just need to walk away and when on the phone, hanging up is the only way.


~~CINDY

nodramamama311
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 7:44 AM
You would totally right if it had only happened this one time. She has done this to me more than a few times over various things over the past years. It's just starting to become more than an annoyance.

Quoting Cindy18:

It's her problem, not yours. She is the one that is worked up over a misprint. You are giving her power by letting it upset you. Your choice but I wouldn't let it bother me so much.

Quoting nodramamama311:

So she gets to be rude and mean to me and I have to get over it? No apology ever and I need to get over it? Blaming me for something I had no control over and I have to get over it? Hmm, interesting point of view.



Quoting Cindy18:

Over what you just descibed above, IMO, you need to get over it. Sounds to me like a personality issue and that's something you are not going to chamge. She didn't insult you or your family, it wasn't even about you. Some people just need to walk away and when on the phone, hanging up is the only way.


Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Angelbaby007
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 7:45 AM
1 mom liked this

Sounds like your really fed up with her behavior. I would talk to her about it. I'm sorry you're going through this with your MIL, I can imagine it must be difficult with no family of your own around. Keep your head up and try not to let her emotions affect yours. Don't make her that powerful. Next time she does it, call her out on it, nicely, and just talk about how she makes you feel. Do this in person. It will help. Best of luck. :)

hkcason
by on Jun. 17, 2013 at 10:45 AM
2 moms liked this

Classic rug sweeper. She throws a hissy fit, gets mad at you & then your suppose to forgive & forget. The problem with rug sweepers is that because no one wants to face the battle to call them out on their behavior so they continually act that way. It's not about grudges, it's about accountability for ones behavior & she's never been held accountable.. You can do 1 of 2 things, 1- continue to sweep it under the rug, never talk about it & grow increasingly upset as it happens or 2- talk to her about how childish it is to become upset & ignore you & when she's upset about something, talk it out, otherwise it never gets fixed. She'll probably resist, but you'll know you tried. Good luck!

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