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can i mourn this loss even if it was because of me?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

i am getting a tattoo to honor my kids-a fancy heart with their  initials in it.  I want two smaller hearts on the outside.  One for a miscarriage I had a few years ago, and the other for an abortion I had when I was 15.  My DH says I should only get 1 smaller heart because the second was my choice!  It was a choice I made a long time ago and it was the hardest thing ever but I still think about it almost daily.  At the time I thought I was doing the right thing (and maybe I did).  Do you think it is in poor taste to go this route?  i just wanted something to honor all of my kids (born or not)!!


the tattoo i was planning has alot of scrollwork on the big heart and the little hearts would come out of the scrollwork so they would look like they are just part of the "main" tattoo.  no one would ever know those smaller hearts symbolized anything unless I told them.  The tattoo would be at the top of my leg so no one would see it unless i show them or when i am wearing a bathing suit.

thanks for the support--makes me feel better knowing there are people who understand--i just wanted the tattoo for me!

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 26, 2013 at 10:36 AM
Replies (31-35):
by New Member on Jul. 27, 2013 at 5:26 PM

 you made a decision that you can't go back and change but forgive yourself and move on. Mourn anyway you like and I think a tat is a wonderful way to remember the children you lost.

by Anonymous 7 on Jul. 27, 2013 at 5:29 PM
You can do whatever you want
by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 12:29 PM

 I like the idea

by on Jul. 29, 2013 at 2:22 PM

I think it's your tattoo that is going on your body.  Do what is going to make you happy with it.  If you don't do the 2nd little heart, you'll always wish it was there.

by Anonymous 8 on Jul. 29, 2013 at 2:50 PM
I vote no tattoo and put that money into finding a therapist.
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