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Is it wrong to hesitate when a stranger offers help?

Posted by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 6:59 PM
  • 12 Replies

I got stuck on side of road, at a sort of busy residential road today. Fortunately, I have my in-laws within 20 minutes away. I waited only about 5 minutes till a police officer stopped to make me move over to side of road a little more & make sure we were ok (help was on way). I had my 3 yr old daughter in back seat. He left.

Then about 5 minutes later a man in truck stopped and offered assistance. I told him my father-in-law was on his way. He says "I'm here. Doesn't hurt me." I say, "I don't know." He says, "yes or no?" Then I decided, fine. He changed out the tire and I gratefully thanked him. I think of myself as a cautious person.

Was it wrong to hesitate? I feel like it was rude of me to not accept his offer of assistance immediately.

by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 6:59 PM
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Replies (1-10):
by Silver Member on Aug. 21, 2013 at 7:01 PM
I'm sure most people would understand why you hesitated
by Member on Aug. 21, 2013 at 7:32 PM
1 mom liked this

Perfectly normal to hesitate!  Best to be cautious.  Of course if he offered you a ride somewhere it would be correct to refuse!!  Glad you made him aware that other help was on the way also.  I'm sure if it was his daughter he would have advised her to be very careful.  Good for you.

by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 7:35 PM
I would err on the side of caution. When I broke down on the highway with a dead phone at night, it took me THREE HOURS to flag down a car, and even then the only one that stopped was on the other side of the divider. It was a woman and her husband, and even though they offered a lift, I still didn't feel comfortable and just asked if I could use their phone. They ended up being super sweet, and he was military, but I still will always be cautious.
by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 7:45 PM

lol, no it wasn't wrong. It isn't necessarily caution on my part but rather that I don't want to put anyone out and cause any trouble for anyone.

It's not rude to be cautious and I bet he didn't think it was rude either.

by Brenda on Aug. 21, 2013 at 8:57 PM

No I would be the same way but I do carry a gun have for years now so I am covered and I do not like someone I do not know messing w/my vehicle, I know it and would have watched him to make sure it was done right...

But I am like you and if he would have tried anything he would have found out that I do carry then, I will never be one of those people who get taken advantage of or raped I will kill them first! I also have a disabled daughter to protect and I would not think twice between another life or hers!

by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 10:26 PM

No you should always be cautious. In this case being in a busy area I think it was okay but it is just your maternal instinct being like "hey be careful"

by on Aug. 21, 2013 at 10:32 PM

I don't think it's ever wrong/rude to be cautious.  Just introduce yourself, get their name, and then call someone and let them know a little about who is helping you.  I'd never take a ride or anything, but a guy being helpful to change out the tire, sure!  :)

by Member on Aug. 21, 2013 at 10:35 PM

For me it's not a matter of "stranger offering help", it's more of "me not being okay with needing help". 

I'm the kind of a person who will do anything in my power to not need help. I don't like the idea of feeling like I owe something to someone. I wouldn't accept any help as long as I'm able to keep my head above the water.

by Silver Member on Aug. 22, 2013 at 10:08 AM

I can understand being hesitant

by on Aug. 22, 2013 at 11:24 AM
3 moms liked this

 It's not rude. It's just reality of the times we live in. I would've hestitated too I'm sure. There is just so much jacked up shit in the world now days you have to be cautious. Especially since you had your dd in car with you.

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