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Was I molested or was it all a dream?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 12 Replies

When I was ages 6-10 I went to day camp at a church. There was always a male camp counselor whom I didn't like. Something about him irked me.

About ten years ago, when I was 15, I remembered something very vivid, the problem is, I cannot say whether or not it was real or a dream.

In my memory, I was standing in the gymnasium alone facing a wall. This counselor stood to my left with his camp shirt on and told me to keep facing the wall. He reached over with his right hand while I stared at the wall and slipped a finger inside my bathing suit down below.

The thing is, I was around 6. Old enough to remember if it ACTUALLY happened, which is why I am leaning towards a dream. But I don't remember if my feelings of dislike towards him came before or after this memory.

It comes into my mind from time to time and the thought of his face still gives me the chills.

This has bothered me for 10 years and I even talked about it with my fiance who is leaning towards dream, as well.

What do you think?

Posted by Anonymous on Sep. 5, 2013 at 3:29 PM
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Replies (1-10):
NDADanceMom
by on Sep. 5, 2013 at 3:39 PM

there is nothing you can do about it.  I would chalk it up as a dream. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 5, 2013 at 3:41 PM
I agree... Not something you can do much about at this point. I say dream so you can move on. If it happened, karma will get him and he will pay in the end.
JocelynMoods
by Member on Sep. 5, 2013 at 3:45 PM
2 moms liked this

If it is bothering you then it's worth talking to a counselor about. It could possibly be a repressed memory. 

Uniquecoolio
by on Sep. 5, 2013 at 5:50 PM
Probably not a dream. The memory is so vivid. This often happens with abuse survivors/victims. It's called repressed memories and often seem dream-like. They start when the abused person feels"safe" enough to remember. I'd seek out some counseling for a couple visits.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 5, 2013 at 5:57 PM

Repressed memories. I didn't remember anything until I was 16. If it bothers you, maybe see a therapist?

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 6, 2013 at 8:32 AM
For a long time I battled that same question, did it happen or is it all a bad dream? What finally helped was realizing that whether or not the abuse happened was not relevant, the feelings I was having were very real and I may never know the truth of what happened.
After coming to that realization I was talking with my sister who remembered in detail the man being in her bed. She filled in the blanks and confirmed that, yes, our father had molested and raped us.
CutieCrab
by Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 9:19 AM

 

Quoting NDADanceMom:

there is nothing you can do about it.  I would chalk it up as a dream. 

 

Clairwil
by Silver Member on Sep. 6, 2013 at 10:41 AM
1 mom liked this
Quoting Anonymous:

When I was ages 6-10 I went to day camp at a church. There was always a male camp counselor whom I didn't like.

What do you think?

I think you should contact the church and find out the name of the man.

Ask them what happened to him.

If he did molest you, the chances are that you were not the only one, and if they tell you that he was discovered molesting someone else, that will at least let you know you were not imagining things.

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Sep. 6, 2013 at 1:30 PM

 I would say it might be a repressed memory, I have in the last year started to really remember being molested by my uncle when I was a small child. There are a lot of things I do not remember about my childhood that I am just now starting to really remember. I am now 38.

adi29
by on Sep. 6, 2013 at 4:32 PM
Go see a counselor. It could had happened
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