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by Michele Zipp
There are plenty of things we do with our loved ones -- intimate things -- that we really wouldn't do with strangers. Like sex, of course. Though some pay for that, but that's illegal, so of course no one reading this does that. But there is another intimate thing we do with our loved ones that apparently if you don't get enough of it at home ... or if you have no one to get it with ... you can now pay someone to do it with you.
It's not sex. It doesn't even involved nudity. But it's snuggling. There's a place called The Snuggle House that's trying to open its doors to the public but has been met with a little push-back from authorities. Oh you don't say?
We get naked and let strangers rub out bodies for a fee when we get massages. How is cuddling any different? Okay, it's totally different. It's someone getting all up in your personal space with their whole body touching your body. Clothed, yes, but still. It's a little strange, not because of the longhaired and perky blondes who work there -- they seem awesome and just want to spread love -- but because of the creeper clientele they will most likely get.
Lonnie Johnson is the longhair and professional snuggler in Madison, Wisconsin, where The Snuggle House wants to open its doors and arms for a good clean snug. He's also a professional in the awesome name department and a professional at mastering the art of the curl without frizz. He's also a professional sensitive man. Oooh the best kind!
Let's watch a little interview with him, shall we?
Oxytocin! You can't bottle that. It's natural, man. Peace. And it is better than great, so I get it. I love a good snuggle. It's one of the perks with having kids -- they love snuggling. But cuddling up to a total stranger, a little odd.
Wisconsin is afraid it's all front for prostitution. But Lonnie ... Lonnie is no male hooker. He's just a hippie soul wanting to wrap his arms around those who are snuggle deprived for $60 an hour. Madison Assistant City Attorney Jennifer Zilavy told the Journal-Sentinel the cuddlers need to get some paperwork in order, namely a certificate of occupancy. Plus, Zilavy says: "If they're snuggling with somebody who gets aroused and wants more, what do they have in place to deal with that? Because that's going to happen, there's no doubt about it. We don't want our police department responding there for sexual assaults all the time. We need to know they've thought through protocols in that situation."
They say they have security at the ready. So maybe, just maybe, there will be some $60 an hour snuggling going on.
Would you ever pay for a snuggle? What do you think of The Snuggle House?