Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The Cafe The Cafe

You Should Tip Your Server. Seriously.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 62 Replies
2 moms liked this

You Should Tip Your Server. Seriously.

By  on November 21, 2013 10:30am EST
 


For awhile now, the debate about whether or not one should tip one’s server has caused pockets of embittered battles across the internet. Here’s the thing: this shouldn’t even be a debate. It shouldn’t be a debate because there’s one clear answer: you should tip your server.

I’m going to skip all of the “you should tip your server because they’re poor” stuff, because that line of reasoning has convinced exactly nobody who is anti-tipping. If you’re anti-tipping, your main point seems to be, “Why should I pay extra and subsidize this person’s existence when nobody does that for me?” and if you’re asking that question, your concern about the poor is probably slim to none. While this way of thinking probably isn’t winning you many friends, it could be a valid question . . . except that it makes assumptions that aren’t true in practice.

One major assumption is that gratuity is on top of the server’s salary. This isn’t true in most states. Gratuity usually is the server’s salary. This is a more important point than just “oh, take pity on servers because they are poor”; it has to do with the system of going out to eat and the compensation of labor. The system of going out to eat assumes that the server will be tipped at least 15% on average, and your meal is priced accordingly. If everyone stopped tipping, that cost would have to be rolled into the price of the food (that means prices go up, FYI) because servers have to get paid. Nobody’s going to come into a restaurant and take orders from you, and set plates of food in front of you while you sit on your ass, and run back to the kitchen because you prematurely ate all of your ranch dressing (and even though there are ten other people waiting, you really need that ranch dressing) without getting a paycheck.

Even if you don’t believe in doing good things to help people, you should be tipping if you want to continue going out to eat and being served by someone else. The expectation is that you’re going to pay the servers; the restaurant isn’t charging you enough to pay the servers out of the cost of your meal. I don’t particularly like this system, either, but that is the system. There’s no magical extra money coming to servers from anywhere else.

If you don’t leave a tip, you’re kinda-sorta also stealing someone’s labor. Pretty much every person who is of reasonable intelligence in America has at least a murky idea that this is how the system works. Because it is assumed at the beginning of the meal that you’ll pay for the labor used, and because bucking this assumption means unfairly wasting the time of a server who could have been serving customers who would tip (maybe customers should start bidding to be served–since the restaurant doesn’t pay the servers, who says you’re entitled to their service just by eating there, anyway? Servers are free agents, in a way), I consider stiffing them on the gratuity borderline theft, unless the circumstances are extreme enough to warrant having your dinner comped.

What about meh service? Yep, those servers deserve tips, too. Even if the server wasn’t particularly bubbly or did an over-the-top job, they deserve some compensation for carting your food out to you and refilling your cups. It’s like buying an off-brand instead of the pricey brand–it may not be as good, but it will suffice. It is, however, still not free.

So. Yeah. Tip your server. If the thought of being generous doesn’t polish your fork, do it because you want to be able to continue going out to eat. Don’t like the system? Fight to change the system at the top, rather than making people go without pay. Boycott the whole restaurant, not the individual who already held up their end of the deal.

(PS, and this is just for me: please stop leaving self-righteous notes about how much you hate tipping. Just, no. That’s like showing off a turd–it’s a damned strange thing to be proud of.)

Posted by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 6:45 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Its.me.Sam.
by Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 6:51 PM

this is such a weird thing.
they are doing their JOB not doing us a favor when we ask for more ranch dressing.  if a person chooses to work in that field they must know that their JOB is to SERVE people and the better they do that job the more money they will make.  very simple exchange of money for services.
we always tip - BUT we will tip minimum for not so great service and we will tip BIG for great service. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2014 at 7:27 PM
1 mom liked this

I understand that getting the customer things they need is part of my job and I love my job because I love being around people, I have never once had a customer complain about the service I provided, on the contrary I have had excellent comments and reviews. But I have still been stiffed many a time and could not understand why. Yes it is our job to serve you but we make so much less than everyone else. If I could change my employers mind about minimum wage I would but then the price of food would go up and no one would dine in and then they would have to close and I would be out of a job.

As far as choosing this job , yes I did choose it but only because it was the only thing that I was offered. I was a stay at home mom for seven years, five of those years I spent in online schooling obtaining my Associates and Bachelors Degree. Two weeks before recieving my Bachelors Degree I started fuilling out applications, sending out my resume and going to a job center to help me find a job in my field, after 3 months I didn't have one interview. So I found a job that worked well with my husbands schedule and it was close to home so I wasn't spending any extra gas money and we didn't have to pay a sitter otherwise I would still be out of work because it wouldn't pay for me to work.


Quoting Its.me.Sam.:

this is such a weird thing.
they are doing their JOB not doing us a favor when we ask for more ranch dressing.  if a person chooses to work in that field they must know that their JOB is to SERVE people and the better they do that job the more money they will make.  very simple exchange of money for services.
we always tip - BUT we will tip minimum for not so great service and we will tip BIG for great service. 


Its.me.Sam.
by Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 7:37 PM

my daughter was a waitress for a bit.  she made bank in tips lol.  
i like how other countries do this tip stuff... no tips..just better wages.
but i believe that employers must make sure that the waitstaff is paid minimum wage.  that if the server doesnt make enough in tips to ensure that the minimum wage is met the employer has to pay the difference.

What is the minimum wage for workers who receive tips?

The Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA) requires payment of at least the federal minimum wage to covered, nonexempt employees.  An employer of a tipped employee is only required to pay $2.13 an hour in direct wages if that amount plus the tips received equals at least the federal minimum wage, the employee retains all tips and the employee customarily and regularly receives more than $30 a month in tips. If an employee's tips combined with the employer's direct wages of at least $2.13 an hour do not equal the federal minimum hourly wage, the employer must make up the difference.

Some states have minimum wage laws specific to tipped employees. When an employee is subject to both the federal and state wage laws, the employee is entitled to the provisions which provides the greater benefits.

 

Quoting Anonymous:

I understand that getting the customer things they need is part of my job and I love my job because I love being around people, I have never once had a customer complain about the service I provided, on the contrary I have had excellent comments and reviews. But I have still been stiffed many a time and could not understand why. Yes it is our job to serve you but we make so much less than everyone else. If I could change my employers mind about minimum wage I would but then the price of food would go up and no one would dine in and then they would have to close and I would be out of a job.

As far as choosing this job , yes I did choose it but only because it was the only thing that I was offered. I was a stay at home mom for seven years, five of those years I spent in online schooling obtaining my Associates and Bachelors Degree. Two weeks before recieving my Bachelors Degree I started fuilling out applications, sending out my resume and going to a job center to help me find a job in my field, after 3 months I didn't have one interview. So I found a job that worked well with my husbands schedule and it was close to home so I wasn't spending any extra gas money and we didn't have to pay a sitter otherwise I would still be out of work because it wouldn't pay for me to work.


Quoting Its.me.Sam.:

this is such a weird thing.
they are doing their JOB not doing us a favor when we ask for more ranch dressing.  if a person chooses to work in that field they must know that their JOB is to SERVE people and the better they do that job the more money they will make.  very simple exchange of money for services.
we always tip - BUT we will tip minimum for not so great service and we will tip BIG for great service. 



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:05 PM

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:08 PM

Even on tips we have to report what we make!!! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:24 PM
Yes, to pay taxes on it. All the salary goes to taxes hense no check ever.

Quoting Anonymous:

Even on tips we have to report what we make!!! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:25 PM

This s the first year I will be doing taxes as a waitress and I am scared!!!!!

Quoting Anonymous: Yes, to pay taxes on it. All the salary goes to taxes hense no check ever.

Quoting Anonymous:

Even on tips we have to report what we make!!! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 



Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:27 PM
My dd got $3000 back last year but she had tuition money paid as a credit also. I was shocked she got so much back.

Quoting Anonymous:

This s the first year I will be doing taxes as a waitress and I am scared!!!!!

Quoting Anonymous: Yes, to pay taxes on it. All the salary goes to taxes hense no check ever.



Quoting Anonymous:

Even on tips we have to report what we make!!! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 



trulyblessed618
by Member on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:28 PM
If you were a server you would appreciate a tip...they don't make much and half of there salary comes from tips. Now if you get a rude or bad server then thats another story.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jan. 8, 2014 at 8:38 PM
Do you claim your tips correctly? Most tips, now a days, are on credit cards so it's hard to flub the numbers but if you do it can come back to haunt you. Next year, if you keep serving, you can set up quarterly payments to offset the amount owed / fine if you owe and didn't pay throughout the year.

DH has worked in the industry forever so we tip outrageously. There are times when I only leave 10/15 % but that's my insult level.

Quoting Anonymous:

This s the first year I will be doing taxes as a waitress and I am scared!!!!!

Quoting Anonymous: Yes, to pay taxes on it. All the salary goes to taxes hense no check ever.



Quoting Anonymous:

Even on tips we have to report what we make!!! 

Quoting Anonymous:

Yes, cheap ass people should tip.  I tipped $45 last night on a $172 tab.  My dd serves and most do tip decent.  People know they make only $2+ an hour.  That ALL goes to taxes.  Only money they bring home is tip money. 

They are working and trying to make it and not sitting at home mooching so I tip well. 



Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)