Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

The Cafe The Cafe

Do you think there are still gentlemen left in this world?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 36 Replies

I know of course there are SOME, but do you all think that there are a lot? I only ask because I'm 24, haven't dated anyone in about 4.5 years. I think I'm scared that no one will accept me for who I am. Funny thing is I'm actually a well mannered woman, who is extremely sweet, and shy. However.......when I younger (16, 17, and 18) I tried to do everything in my power to rebel against my overprotective parents. Unfortunately that included getting tattoos. Yep, I was a dumbass. Now I have these horrid tattoos that take up my entire back and I'm self conscious about wearing anything that requires my back to be out. On top of being scared to date, I'm also scared to death of sex. I think sex should be beautiful, but I'm too damn self conscious to even enjoy it because of my stretch marks, plus bad tattoos. Do you think there are men out there that understand you may have had a stupid past and will overlook it (even if the "evidence" is still there)? Sad thing is imo I'm pretty and I'm in shape (despite the stretch marks). Men ask for my nubmer, but I always end up refusing because:

1. I'm scared of letting people down

2. I'm scared of showing people the real me

3. All they want is sex (and they make it known).

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 23, 2014 at 10:49 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
squeekers
by Member on Apr. 23, 2014 at 10:50 PM

hmmm. bump because I think so.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 23, 2014 at 10:57 PM

BUMP!

Paigesmommy78
by Silver Member on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:00 PM
Yeah there r still some out there they r just few and far between and I'm lucky enough to call one my husband
Keep it head up the right one will come along for u when the time is right
Steph84FL
by Member on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:03 PM
Letting them down how? What is it about you that makes you feel less than adequate? Tattoos and stretch marks?! That's foolishness.

Quoting Anonymous:

I know of course there are SOME, but do you all think that there are a lot? I only ask because I'm 24, haven't dated anyone in about 4.5 years. I think I'm scared that no one will accept me for who I am. Funny thing is I'm actually a well mannered woman, who is extremely sweet, and shy. However.......when I younger (16, 17, and 18) I tried to do everything in my power to rebel against my overprotective parents. Unfortunately that included getting tattoos. Yep, I was a dumbass. Now I have these horrid tattoos that take up my entire back and I'm self conscious about wearing anything that requires my back to be out. On top of being scared to date, I'm also scared to death of sex. I think sex should be beautiful, but I'm too damn self conscious to even enjoy it because of my stretch marks, plus bad tattoos. Do you think there are men out there that understand you may have had a stupid past and will overlook it (even if the "evidence" is still there)? Sad thing is imo I'm pretty and I'm in shape (despite the stretch marks). Men ask for my nubmer, but I always end up refusing because:

1. I'm scared of letting people down

2. I'm scared of showing people the real me

3. All they want is sex (and they make it known).

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:12 PM

Yeah :( I know it sounds crazy! It's just I have a few associates who are men and sometimes I overhear other mens' conversations and they talk about about all the shallowness of having a woman with the perfect body.  I already regret the tattoos (and it's A LOT) because they don't represent who I am at all, but on top of that I'm scared someone who might like me will walk away one they see me naked.  I've always been self conscious of my stretch marks though because I have a few from when I was younger. However once I became pregnant a few crept up my hips, stomach, and butt (I'm 24 and can't even wear a bikini or cut out bathing suit). I know I'm overthinking this, I'm just worried.

Quoting Steph84FL: Letting them down how? What is it about you that makes you feel less than adequate? Tattoos and stretch marks?! That's foolishness.
Quoting Anonymous:

I know of course there are SOME, but do you all think that there are a lot? I only ask because I'm 24, haven't dated anyone in about 4.5 years. I think I'm scared that no one will accept me for who I am. Funny thing is I'm actually a well mannered woman, who is extremely sweet, and shy. However.......when I younger (16, 17, and 18) I tried to do everything in my power to rebel against my overprotective parents. Unfortunately that included getting tattoos. Yep, I was a dumbass. Now I have these horrid tattoos that take up my entire back and I'm self conscious about wearing anything that requires my back to be out. On top of being scared to date, I'm also scared to death of sex. I think sex should be beautiful, but I'm too damn self conscious to even enjoy it because of my stretch marks, plus bad tattoos. Do you think there are men out there that understand you may have had a stupid past and will overlook it (even if the "evidence" is still there)? Sad thing is imo I'm pretty and I'm in shape (despite the stretch marks). Men ask for my nubmer, but I always end up refusing because:

1. I'm scared of letting people down

2. I'm scared of showing people the real me

3. All they want is sex (and they make it known).


Steph84FL
by Member on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:18 PM
1 mom liked this
Let me get one thing straight. If a man wants to have sex with you...and your naked..and your tattoos or stretch marks make him turn away....he is a douche...Or just gay and never wanted to sleep with you in the first place

Your putting way to much thought into this. What do you think would help you boost your confidence
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:29 PM

If I could get my tattoos removed. I've already talked to my dermatologist about it and of course they say they can do it, but considered everything I have it would take a good 2 years to have everything removed. On top of that when I did some research, I learned that while the laser can remove some tattoos effectively, if you have a lot or at least big pieces with lots of black ink, it will never be fully removed, just faded. I also looked into the whole skin graphing thing and I'm contemplated  if I would rather have scars instead of tattoos. I actually love tattoos, but the only think that irks me is my tattoos are trashy and ugly and that's doesn't define me at all. However, you are absolutely right! If a man won't have sex with me because of the tattoos and stretch marks, then he is a douche. Now, if only I would let someone close enough to even get the opportunity to have meaningful sex. I can get laid whenever I want, but I don't like quickies and I don't want a relationship that is built primarily around sex. A lot of boys/men my age are only looking to hook up on top of being shallow. Lol that's my problem, I put way too much thought into everything.

Quoting Steph84FL: Let me get one thing straight. If a man wants to have sex with you...and your naked..and your tattoos or stretch marks make him turn away....he is a douche...Or just gay and never wanted to sleep with you in the first place Your putting way to much thought into this. What do you think would help you boost your confidence


Steph84FL
by Member on Apr. 23, 2014 at 11:39 PM
And that's where I stop giving any advice lol. Ill be thirty in Aug and have yet to be in a relationship. In fact the mere thought of a "boyfriend" makes me cringe. I've had it my way for so long Id be "the bitch who refused to compromise" LOL

Ill stick with my casual sex with the same old dude...I just kick him out when Im done with him....Cuz he sure the hell ain't sleeping in my bed LOL

Quoting Anonymous:

If I could get my tattoos removed. I've already talked to my dermatologist about it and of course they say they can do it, but considered everything I have it would take a good 2 years to have everything removed. On top of that when I did some research, I learned that while the laser can remove some tattoos effectively, if you have a lot or at least big pieces with lots of black ink, it will never be fully removed, just faded. I also looked into the whole skin graphing thing and I'm contemplated  if I would rather have scars instead of tattoos. I actually love tattoos, but the only think that irks me is my tattoos are trashy and ugly and that's doesn't define me at all. However, you are absolutely right! If a man won't have sex with me because of the tattoos and stretch marks, then he is a douche. Now, if only I would let someone close enough to even get the opportunity to have meaningful sex. I can get laid whenever I want, but I don't like quickies and I don't want a relationship that is built primarily around sex. A lot of boys/men my age are only looking to hook up on top of being shallow. Lol that's my problem, I put way too much thought into everything.

Quoting Steph84FL: Let me get one thing straight. If a man wants to have sex with you...and your naked..and your tattoos or stretch marks make him turn away....he is a douche...Or just gay and never wanted to sleep with you in the first place

Your putting way to much thought into this. What do you think would help you boost your confidence

NDADanceMom
by on Apr. 24, 2014 at 1:38 AM

You can wait to have sex until you are in a loving relationship. If a man loves you these things do not matter

fudgybuddymom
by Member on Apr. 24, 2014 at 6:54 AM

I think you are right to refuse their numbers if it is evident all they want is sex. However that said,I understand the feelings of being scared of letting others down or even showing off the true you but you may never meet someone who is just right for you if you don't let yourself shine! (I am assuming you would like a romantic relationship,yes?) My husband accepted me for all my physical flaws including benign cysts in a very private area. He did not make fun of me or reject me cause of my appearance. We were together 13 yrs all told before he died & while I don't think I will find another with such incredible acceptance & love who knows.?

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)