• In the Spotlight:
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Would you trust him after hearing this?

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:13 AM
  • 7 Replies

This is kinda long so i apologise now.

I was living in the Caribbean (moved there from England)  and i found my boyfriend there. We now have a 21 month daughter and I'm back living in England with her because I couldn't afford to stay in Antigua.

Now, he has an ex girlfriend from America who goes out there every 3 months or so for about a month at a time. (apparently her family is very rich) She stays in a villa there near to where he works. The beach she uses is the one he works on. So she is seeing him everyday. She still wants him back even though she knows he's with me and we have a daughter. He has told me she doesn't mind sharing him with me. I told him to that under no uncertain terms was i sharing and if that was the case she could have him. He told me he doesn't want her back and that he only wants me and our daughter, that he loves us both to death. BUT he did say that he still likes her as a friend.

Well she does everything she can to get to him. She bribes/blackmails him into going out with her so that everyone can see them together and not with me. She tells everyone that he is her boyfriend. Also I have since found out that he borrowed 300$ from her to go out. I was sooooo angry I didn't speak to him for a few days and things aren't great now.

I can't afford to keep going back whenever i like but i want my daughter to know her dad. Am i being stupid for keeping him, should i just let him go? What would you guys do?

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:13 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-7):
AlyssaH87
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:17 AM

So he lives in Antigua and you live in England? Sorry sweetheart, seems like he just keeps you around so he can see his daughter when he wants to.. I don't think its ok for him to live there and not with you. I doubt they are strictly friends... I'm sorry, JMO...


Click Picture to Join "Lookin Fine in '09" a weightloss group!
Photo of Audrina Patridge, edited by AlyssaH87

j_c_c_s_l
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:17 AM

why would you have to take your daughter to him? shouldn't he come to her?! anyway I would not stay in that kind of relationship but that is me since I have been thru crap with someone before so I learned my lesson! I hope everything works out for you though!

mommyjof2
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:18 AM

If you all love each other why not get a place together and get married. It seems like he doesnt want to be with her because if he did, I doubt he would be telling you about what is going on.

c_boerman
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:21 AM

First off hugs to you mama as I can feel your sadness and pain.  I think there is a lot he is not telling you.  If he EVEN mentioned the fact that she told him she was okay in sharing him he was in an indirect way seeing what you thought of the idea.  He obviously is doing more with her than he is telling you. 

There are plenty of ways for your daughter to know her dad and that doesn't mean you have to stay in this unhealthy relationship with him.  I would say its time for you to move on. 

hugs

LLGina
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:21 AM

Yeah he lives in antigua (thats where he's from) and i'm in England. I am saving to go back and live there but i gotta get my job sorted first. Yes he expects me to go there so he can see me and his daughter.  Part of me wants to move on but another part of me feels sick to think of him with another girl.

sheilabug
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:25 AM

i know you care about him, but he's treating you badly. he's not making an effort to prove his love to you. it is very disrespectful of him to continue seeing this girl.

MissMandaz
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 8:31 AM


Quoting c_boerman:

First off hugs to you mama as I can feel your sadness and pain.  I think there is a lot he is not telling you.  If he EVEN mentioned the fact that she told him she was okay in sharing him he was in an indirect way seeing what you thought of the idea.  He obviously is doing more with her than he is telling you. 

There are plenty of ways for your daughter to know her dad and that doesn't mean you have to stay in this unhealthy relationship with him.  I would say its time for you to move on. 

hugs

i dont think you can trust him anymore..i cosign what is underlined above..

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)