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GRR! I need to get her a shirt that says, " I have autism! leave me alone!"

Posted by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:06 PM
  • 28 Replies

So I took my DD with high functioning autism to the children's museum today and she did great!  She has come so far and a year ago this a trip we could not have taken without her melting down or clinging to me.   Therapy has done so much for her.  She gets a little anxious in large social situations and has social avoidance with other kids.  So basically she just plays by herself and if a kid comes near her she either leaves quickly or just does her own thing and does not interact with them.  Last year she would not even be okay playing by them.  So, I was so happy and proud of her today!  Playing by other kids is a BIG deal for her.  And her big issue is that she HATES to be touched by people she is not familiar with and even with us she still often does not like it. 

So, now to the needing the shirt part.  Toward the end of our trip Lilly was playing on the play structure shooting balls out of a air cannon all by herself.  She had a bag of balls she had collected and was putting them it and shooting them out.  There were 4 other spots with the same cannons by her.  Well they were all being used.  And so when a boy about 3 yrs old came up and wanted to play, his mom told him to ask one of the kids to share.  Well of course I saw hm going toward  to my Lilly.  And knowing how it was gonna go, I quickly turned to the mom and said," My Lilly (and pointed to her) is probably not going to be a good choice for sharing she has some spacial issues and does not like to be touched."  I said "You might want to advise him to try with someone else".  And the Mom looked at me disgustedly and said, "Well she needs to learn than doesn't she?"  To which I calmly said, " We are working on it, and she has come a long way but she is not there yet"  To which she said, "So my kid has to pay for your bad parenting"  I was pissed, but just took a deep breath and decided not to comment. 


Well as I expected as this stupid conversation was finishing the little boy asked Lilly to share to which she just looked at her feet and did not answer.  Then he decided to yell it at her and tap her shoulder repeatedly  and say loudly "Did you hear me?"  And of course I knew what was gonna happen so I was on my way up the play structure when my Lilly pushed the boy hard and yelled, "leave me lone, leave me lone " put her hands over her ears and then  started rocking.  So I had to calm her down and then once I did I talked her about how she needs to use her words and not push even if someone does something she does not like.  Then after she was calm I went down the structure and Lilly went back to balls.  So when I got down of course the mom consoling her son was pissed.  I apologized and said she really just has trouble with being touched or yelled at because she is autistic.  To which the mom went off on a rant and told me that she could not believe I let her stay up there after she pushed her son and did not give her any consequences or make her apologize.  So i calmed explained that she does not understan consequences like time outs and that she WILL not talk to other kids so asking her to apologize is not appropriate.  I told her I talked to her about using her words and will continue to talk to her about it after we leave and for her that that was the best way to get through.  Then the lady said, "well autism or not my kid would learn discipline."  By this point I was so done!  I looked at her and said, "Well when you have a kid with autism live with it day in and day out then I will take parenting advice from you, until then shut your mouth when you do not know what you are talking about!"  Then I left her with those words and went to go play with Lilly on the play structure! 


I HATE people with no tolerance or understanding for other people or kids who are different!  Sadly I am so used to this stuff that I let it roll off and enjoyed the rest of the time and forgot about her and ignored her dirty looks.  But, know sitting here thinking of it, it really pisses me off! GRRRRR!  Anyway, thanks for letting me vent!

Kelly

          

                                   

by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:06 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SJA1988
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:12 PM

wow, what a bitch that lady was I would have been so pissed as well!

Congratulations with your daughter and the museum!!! high five(for you and Lily )

KairisMama
by Bronze Member on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:13 PM

That woman was an ignorant BITCH!  

Kairi snowgirl

Teeshann
by Silver Member on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:14 PM

well glad she did good up to that point. some ppl are just stupid.

ashleykilleen
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:22 PM

i am so sorry that women was soo ignorent,i would have said alot more but i am have a bad  mouth, i actualy called a women out of burger king for stareing at my sister who has CP.

good luck momma!!!

-ash

 ttcpreview image

MrsPilat
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:27 PM

 I looked at her and said, "Well when you have a kid with autism live with it day in and day out then I will take parenting advice from you, until then shut your mouth when you do not know what you are talking about!"

 

 

good for you mama : ) I'm sorry that lady was so rude!

ForeverMeme
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:27 PM

 

taramd3
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:33 PM

hey kelly i sent you an email with TONS of shirt saying that you could use....

momof2little1s
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:33 PM

I love that!!!!

Quoting ForeverMeme:

 


          

                                   

Domzmom2005
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:44 PM

Congrats on getting her as far as you have.

Forget what ignorant people say...my 3 year old son is the same way about people touching him, he has a habit of pushing and screaming at other kids.

Kudos to you for speaking your mind in a reasonable way and defending your daughter, and you are right...until someone has lived in your shoes they have NO right to try and tell you how to live YOUR life.

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texm0m0f4
by on Feb. 13, 2009 at 11:53 PM

I understand how you feel. My son has Autism and its a work in progress everyday. People are rude to us too. I try and explain to them why he is that way but sometimes there is nothing that I can say to help them understand. My job is to help my son and to be the best parent I can be everyday. I think its hard for people to understand what they do not know.

My 12 year old son is really protective of his little brother and when people give us a hard time he is very supportive. When I get upset about the way people look at us or treat us he says

( you cant fix stupid mom)

You can't judge a book by it's cover but you can tell how much it's going to cost.

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