NO birthday party for my 5 year old, ok?!

Replies:

• 
• by
  • Angela735
  on Jul. 4, 2009 at 2:09 PM

• I think that if the child wants one and it is financially possible then that is fine. If the child is happy with a day at the play park and a movie then that is fine too. It is her day!

• 
• by
  • acissejessica
  on Jul. 4, 2009 at 2:24 PM

• Thank you :)
  

  Quoting wissotamum:
  
  I don't understand. It sounds to me like you're having a party for her: taking her to a play place, a cake, a movie and a day with Mommy celebrating her special day. What about that doesn't spell awesome day? It's not about how many people, presents, or money spent. You'll be spending time with her and that's what kids crave the most - time with their parents. She won't be crushed, ruined, hurt or otherwise scarred from a lack of a big family or friend party. You're doing just fine, Momma!

  
  

  

  
  

  

• 
• by
  • acissejessica
  on Jul. 4, 2009 at 2:25 PM

• my daughter has aspergers, parties are actually kind of difficult for her.
  

  Quoting Princess_Paden:
  
  

  My kids are only 1 and 2, but they've had birthday parties every year so far. I'm already planning their birthday party for this year, and its not until November. My oldests first party was at my inlaws, and had about 10 guests, only 3 kids plus my daughter, the rest were DH's and my friends who were involved in our lives then. Last year's party was a joint birthday for their first and second birthdays, since they were both born in november (we had it mid-nov.), it was at my family's church and we had a few kids and more family and friends. I think there were about 15-20 people there. We made cheap food (cheese ball and crackers, chips and dip, sodas and juice and pb&j sandwhiches) and talked and let the kids play instead of doing games or having it at like chuckee cheese. This year I plan to do the same thing. I see what your saying, that expensive parties are not worth it and are overrated, thats why we have small family gatherings and just hang out and talk/play. There are cheap ways to celebrate birthdays, plus kids love parties.

  
  

  

  
  

  

• 
• by
  • mimanchibella
  on Jul. 4, 2009 at 4:55 PM

• IMHO, a birthday party is intended to celebrate life. To me, it IS important, our son will have a big bash every year. First off, I will not take that away from our families, they came to the hospital when he was born, therefore Olivers birthday is not only a huge celebration, but a day to remember who he is and how far he has come. Why not just invite your family over for her cake, take the day and spend it with her, we plan on doing the same thing. However, everyone and their brothers are invited to celebrate with us and most importantly HIM at the appropriate time. Having company is not a big deal, and sharing cake and a song is nothing extraordinary. Celebrate your daughter, not her family.

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Anti-vaxing, Anti-circing, Pro BFing, ERFing, CDing, Goin' Green, Proud Mama to Oliver, the Miracle 1lb. 8oz., 13 inches long 24 weeker.

• 
• by
  • Charbear76
  on Jul. 4, 2009 at 5:22 PM

• I agree with you. I don't think partys are necessary, especially if the child doesn't have anyone close to their age to invite. We've had partys since we joined a playgroup and my cousins moved back with their 2 daughters, but they have always been in-home partys and the group has never been more than 10 kids. Before that I tried having parties with inviting family but hardly anyone came. One year only 1 person came and I had invited 12. So I stopped having parties and got b*tched out for it. So the next year, and this is the year we had joined the playgroup so thankfully other people did come, but every single person that had b*tched the year before got invited but didn't show up and only 2 of them sent a birthday card. I had to even buy 2 extra packs of invitations to invite these people (this not counting the pack that was for those that did come, so 3 packs in total). So none of those people ever get invitations anymore and their b*tching gets ignored.

  A child's birthday is for THEM, no one else. Its their day to enjoy and shouldn't be planned just to please other people. I learned that the hard way.

   

• 
• by
  • TeriMelisa
  on Jul. 5, 2009 at 12:23 PM

• My daughter did not have a 5th birthday party this year. We had planned 1 and sent out invitations. But the party was at the end of April, and about 3 days before the party a kid at an elementary school in our city got the swine flu. Our city is not that big, so they closed all of the elementary schools. Then it came out that 3 or 4 more kids had it. A few parents called to say they weren't going to come, and we were only having around 8 or 9 kids anyway. So instead of having the party and running the risk of noone showing up which would have really hurt her feelings. We just canceled it. We were going to reschedule but just about 2 weeks after that weeked her mother's morning out class was letting out, and most all the kids had plans. So we just decided not to have a party. What we did was let her decide what she wanted her grandmothers to make her for a special supper, and we got the grandparents, us and her aunts and uncles together and we had supper then played a few games that she wanted to play. She had so much fun, because it was her night and all the adults were doing what she wanted to do. I think she had more fun with that than she would have had at a party. I do not think there is anything wrong with you not giving your daughter a party. Tell the family to get over it. Tell them they can come by and wish her happy birthday, but you are making it a family day/night. 

• 
• by
  • mrsJLA
  on Jul. 5, 2009 at 12:33 PM

• What matters most is that your 5 yr old will be happy and feel special on her birthday.

  And that you keep your sanity LOL.

  So forget what everyone else wants or expects and do what will make her happy :)

  To be honest, I remember all of 1 birthday party when I was younger, and I wasn't "scarred" - LOL.

• 
• by
  • acissejessica
  on Jul. 5, 2009 at 12:53 PM

• Thanks ladies. I actually talked to a neighbor today that I don't know, but has 4 kids, 2 of which are 5! So she agreed to walk with us (we live within eye shot) to a spray park in the morning so she has kids to play with. Then after that my daughter wants to go to Chuck E Cheese. I will mention to the family that that is our plans and if they want to JOIN us they can, or stop in during the day, then fine. Thanks again for all the ideas.

  

  
  

  

• 
• by
  • MonLeighB
  on Jul. 5, 2009 at 2:30 PM

•  For me and my siblings we did a party every other year once we were in elementary school so that we could invite a few of our friends from school. Until then... (and now) we did/do family things (seriously just dinner and MAYBE a game). Most of the time its just mom, dad, siblings (and their SO)... no extended family. We are all well-rounded and normal! I have a friend who has had a big birthday bash every year and she is beyond selfish and spoiled and I really think she thinks this world revolves around her! lol - and she is an adult!!! I think that as long as your child feels special on her birthday and she knows its a day for her... no matter who is there... then you are doing a great job!!

  If your family throws a stink... ask your daughter what she wants to do for dinner... and then do that... maybe let them come and when you call them tell them that she got to plan what SHE wanted not what you thought they'd want.... it is HER birthday, ya know?! :) Good luck!! :)

• 
• by
  • liha
  on Jul. 5, 2009 at 3:00 PM

•   My daughter's birthday was 2 weeks ago. I asked her what she wanted to do, and she requested a birthday trip to Seneca Rocks. She wanted to explore Smoke Hole Cavern for her birthday and some people thought I was selfish because we didn't have a huge birthday bash for her.

   Yes, a child's birthday party is supposed to be fun and nobody should have to put up with pissy whiny adults. So this year, if those pissy whiny adults don't like your choice of venue, tell them to stay home.

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