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Ten Things You'd Never Want to See Your Mom Wearing

Posted by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 7:20 PM
  • 16 Replies

Ten Things You'd Never Want to See Your Mom Wearing
by Momversation on August 12, 2009

Although moms come in all shapes and sizes (and fashion styles), there are just some things you never want to see your mom wearing.  Ever.  And we've listed them all here (brain bleach not included).

10.  Leather Mama Wear:  There's nothing wrong with tasteful leather:  a nice leather jacket, maybe a sassy leather skirt.  But head-to-toe, tight leather is a look only someone who calls herself "Mistress" can pull off.  And who wants to picture their mom as a dominatrix?

9.  Multiple Facial Piercings:  A single nose ring or eyebrow piercing isn't particularly offputting, but if your mom starts to look like the chick below... Piercing Pagoda, we have a problem!  After all, you don't want to risk your children contracting tetanus when getting a kiss from their grandmother.

8.  Low-rise Jeans:  Low-rise jeans lead to muffin tops and thong exposures.  That's not attractive for anyone, let alone the woman who gave birth to you.  Here's a hint moms: coin slots are for bubble gum machines only.

7.  Teddy:  A woman buys a teddy for only one reason: to look sexy for her man.  But when that woman's man happens to be your dad, stomach turning (and brain-searing imagery) ensues.  Sure, it's great if your parents still have the hots for each other, as long as they don't let you know the nitty-gritty details... like the color of your mom's negligee. 

6.  Hotpants:  These "hotpants" aren't pants by any stretch of the imagination; they're underwear.  (You can't fool us!)  Unless your mom's name happens to be Daisy Duke, there's no excuse for her wearing these... except for maybe American Apparel-induced insanity.

5.  See-Through Dress:  It's a formal dinner.  Your mom enters the restaurant, slips off her coat, and there she is.  Standing in the middle of the room, her tatas visible to all through her gauzy dress.  Somewhere, Annie Lennox's song "Why?" plays, and you begin to weep quietly.

4.  Lady Gaga's Kermit the Frog Coat:  If your mom shows up in this coat, check her into the mental ward, stat, because something has gone wrong.  Terribly wrong.  And you don't want your kids to think Grandma murdered Kermit, do you?

3.  Armpit Hair Shirt:  Your mom + Long, curly armpit hair = Throw up in the mouth.

2.  Thong Bikini:  Butt cheeks are generally not the most attractive part of a person, especially a person who has had three kids and a lifetime of office work, um, behind her (sorry for the pun).  We're not saying Mom has to cover everything up, but some things should be kept between her and her physician. 

1.  Hands-on-Boobs Bra:  This tacky bra makes you think of one thing:  someone grabbing your mom's boobs.  Need we elaborate on why this is the #1 thing you wouldn't want to see your mom wearing?  Nah, we didn't think so.

What do you never want to see your mom wearing?

 





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by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 7:20 PM
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Replies (1-10):
acissejessica
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 7:32 PM

that stuff is just wrong!

I'm Slow


3gigglemonsters
by on Aug. 12, 2009 at 7:40 PM

hahahaha!  Thanks!

natasia61589
by on Aug. 13, 2009 at 7:41 AM

lol i think you could have simplified it by saying we don't want to see any kind of lingerie

mom2ryneandsam
by on Aug. 13, 2009 at 8:27 AM

not just my mom I wouldn't want to see some of those things on any woman

Tracy67
by on Aug. 13, 2009 at 8:34 AM

spandex, a bikini, a micromini... well, basically all the things my kids wouldn't want to see on me!

supercraftymom
by on Aug. 13, 2009 at 12:31 PM

Hilarious! Will use as bribery  to get my  DD to keep room clean(ish)! "Now wouldn't you hate to see your mom show up to a PTA meeting in.....(pick any one of  those & insert here)!" I'll bet I won't find anymore candy wrappers laying around!

mom2boys1997
by on Aug. 13, 2009 at 8:08 PM

Remember, you are someones mom. What would they not want to see YOU wear.

( I personally feel for kids when mom takes them to the park and their mom is wearing a halter with naked farie tatoos on their backs. I have children who do not need to see such)

                                                                 embarrassed

Stel1259
by on Aug. 14, 2009 at 9:22 AM

Well I am a 50 year old Mom and Grandma and I do not approve of all the tattoes the young girls are getting now....its just ridiculous. I dont even like seeing tattoes on women my age. And as for the halter tops and short shorts...well, those should be left at home, behind closed doors, not EVERYONE thinks they look HOT. To me they actually look kind of desperate, trying to hold on to their youth, yadda yadda...Piercings are another story, two or three ear piercings, maybe a naval piercing...but as far as the eyebrow, nose, lip well now you are starting to look freakish, really, and what company is going to hire you coming out of high school or college looking like that? can you imagine introducing your boy/girlfriend to a woman with multiple piercings, tattoes and in a bikini? Especially if she is over the age of 55? and not quite the bikini wearing type???? EEKS!!!!! I think once you start having children, you should act and dress appropriately. Not totally June Cleaver but somewhat conservative, especially to your child's functions......its just my opinion....

MaddiesMaMa418
by on Aug. 14, 2009 at 9:24 AM

Or the mom at the park with the "It's not easy being easy" t-shirt lol. (Saw that once)

Quoting mom2boys1997:

Remember, you are someones mom. What would they not want to see YOU wear.

( I personally feel for kids when mom takes them to the park and their mom is wearing a halter with naked farie tatoos on their backs. I have children who do not need to see such)

                                                                 embarrassed




april573
by on Aug. 14, 2009 at 11:32 AM

I don't really think any of those, flatter anyone!!   But I did love the tag that went with the see thru dress.  LOL

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