"Why is my baby so different? She is not like any of my friends' babies. They sleep through the night. They're happy being held by anyone. My friends don't seem as tired as I am. What am I doing wrong?"

Sound familiar? Your baby acts the way she does because that's the way she is. Your baby... MORE

"Why is my baby so different? She is not like any of my friends' babies. They sleep through the night. They're happy being held by anyone. My friends don't seem as tired as I am. What am I doing wrong?"

Sound familiar? Your baby acts the way she does because that's the way she is. Your baby acts the way she does, not because of your parenting, but because of her personality.

What is a high-need baby? A baby that is intense, hyperactive, draining, feeds frequently, demanding, awakens easily, unsatisfied, unpredicatable, super-sensitive, wants to be held often, and not able to self-soothe.

These infants have been called fussy, colicky, difficult, spirited and, sometimes, spoiled. But most parents aren’t looking for a label. Rather, hoping for some understanding of our children’s behaviour.

Parenting a high-need baby is an intense and demanding experience, but there is good news. “We like to encourage parents about what they have to look forward to,” says Sears. “We call it the payoff. Those high-need babies, if they are parented in a sensitive, responsive and involved way, grow up to be truly wonderful children. They are energetic, outgoing, confident — they are leaders, not followers.”

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