He is so mean now

[trevoralexa]

My son started first grade in aug. He used to be so frendly to everyone. Now i had to go meet with his teacher because the kids he use to be friends with now are not because he told one girl he could not be her friend because she had bad breath, one boy he could not be his friend because he wore wal mart shoes and another boy he would not be his friend because his clothes were not very clean. Now my husband and i NEVER speak this way and we have always tryed to teach him that if u dont have anything nice to say dont say anything at all. But all the sudden he is in 1st grade and cant understand what that means. its making me crazy because that is not how we want our son to treat people and we have no clue where he would learn that sort of thing? How do i get him out of this?

 

 

[kissmiss213]

i have no idea, dd is oversensative and way too friendly. she would go home with the kid that bullied her! lol. just keep talking to him, and if he keeps acting up then u could always take away privileges.

[MommaE7]

Is it possible this is coming from another kid he's hanging with at school.  They pick up good and bad habits from others on the playground, lunchroom, etc. If this is a totally new behavior someone has impacted him.  It may even be an older kid at school that he sees acting/talking this way to others.  I would have repeated heart to hearts with him.  Explain how we're all different, etc. Let kim know point blank he will be the one left lonely if it continues. Good luck mom, man do we have a tough job or what.

[lacrymosa9105]

i agree with the above poster. I think he is gettting this bad behavior from someone else. mayeb a cousin even. I dont think kids just start acting out like that all by themselves. Has he watched anything on tv that was like that ? I would go to his school and observe him for the day. i went ot my sons school and observed him and came to find that ther was a child in there that used bad language and was very mean. he told a girl "fuck that , dont paint stupid rainbows. Stop painting rainbows." He also at one point told her "The teacher doesnt like you, the teacher told me to tell you to shut up" . i was very surprised how mean kids can be. But anyway, you should see whats going on in his class room.

[FLMotherof2]

I would think the other posters are correct. He may be learning it from another student, older cousin, etc. It may also be from behavior he sees on TV. Sometimes my daughter says things that could unintentionally hurt others feelings. I explain to her that it could be hurtful and ask her how she would feel if someone said those things to her. Treating others kindly and with respect is a rule in our house. Punishable just as any other rule with time outs, loss of privileges, free time, snacks, etc.  Stick with it but treat it just as you would the breaking of any rule. If it's hard to find out if he's being mean to children at school then talk with his teacher. She can inform you in his agenda (if he has one) if there were issues. Communication is key. Between your teacher, you, your husband, your son, and the teacher.

[amyd4581]

My only guess would be that he's influenced by other kids at his school.  My DD Lindsay is also in 1st grade and she comes home and says things and acts a certain way sometimes that I just know she's getting it at school.  Just know you're not alone in this.

[AmberT.]

Well I agree with the other posters too.  But I wanted to tell you that If my kid said he couldn't be friends with someone because they wore Walmart shoes ( which he does anyway) and if he didn't, I would tell him well from now on that's where you'll be getting your shoes. lol.   Also a heart to heart about how that makes another person feel wouldn't hurt either.

[FLMotherof2]

Haha! Awesome answer to the issue regarding the shoes!! My kids wear mostly walmart too. They are kids! They ruin things constantly or grow out of them too soon.  I do however, like to get a nice pair of tennis shoes once in awhile. Arch support and all that. Anyway, I like your response! My kind of parenting.

Quoting AmberT.:

Well I agree with the other posters too.  But I wanted to tell you that If my kid said he couldn't be friends with someone because they wore Walmart shoes ( which he does anyway) and if he didn't, I would tell him well from now on that's where you'll be getting your shoes. lol.   Also a heart to heart about how that makes another person feel wouldn't hurt either.

[trevoralexa]

When he came home and said it that is what we told he and it made him cry. I explaned to him that he does wear wal mart shoes sometimes and it ok and there is nothing wrong with that.

[devante9901]

Maybe ask the teacher to log the time day he's behaving badly. I found out my daughter's school offers sugared cereals (cinnamon toast crucnch, for example) for breakfast, and she pours chocolate milk in it.

I know for a fact that sugar makes my daughter rude and nasty.

She would be better off skipping breakfast altogether than loading up on sugared cereal. But since total crap food like that isn't available at home, it's hard to talk her into wheat toast with butter :-)

I've been meaning to go to a PTA meeting and bring this up. I am just horrified at the awful food served by the school. Sigh. One more thing on my list.