I have two boys ages 8 & 7.
I have been going through such a time with them to the point of exhaustion.
When we are at church or the store, etc. I always hear people tell me how helpful & loving they are, especially with other children who are younger. (I have a 5 year old daughter so they are used to being caring.)
However, I feel they can be so disrespectful towards me. They will do what others say in a hearbeat but if I tell them to do something, I have to repeat myself so many times before they listen. And many times they will have a meltdown like it's a two-year old tantrum all over again. They are too old to be doing that and I am so fed up.
Of course if DH is home they're fine, they know to respect him. But he gets upset to hear they've given me a hard time while he's at work. He reminds them that all he expects of them to respect me.
We have tried different things to prevent, avoid, change that behavior.
We have taken away their toys to the point they have NONE to play with, but then they play wrestle & superheroes with each other.
We have had them write about their behavior & how they can improve it.
We are Christian so we've continuously emphasized the Bible's "Honor your Father & Mother..." & we do daily Bible study that will teach them lessons on obedience, honesty, trust, respect, etc.
I have a high tolerance, am patient & give them chance after chance. But it's almost as though nothing works until I'm angry/frustrated and having to yell/talk loudly that it scares them straight for just a moment. Even with that, they'll have a serious face for a minute until they glance at each other and start laughing. Like they get a kick out of seeing me at my wits end!
I am at a loss on what will work effectively & quickly! I know it takes 21-28 days to form a habit, but I'm needing something that will help me in 21 minutes at least. lol. I'm able to maintain my sense of humor because I know I can't be the only one going through this. Right?
I have other friends raising boys as well going through similar, and they have said tough love works best.
But what can I do to get through to them?!
Has anyone gone through this? What have you tried? What has worked?
Any advice is sincerely appreciated.
Thanks in advance.