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Am I right to stress the point of a diet onto my husband for his 8 year old?

Posted by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 3:54 PM
  • 10 Replies

 My step daughter weighs what I am suppose to weigh for my height and age. 135lbs. I am scared to death for her health and even her life. How can I bring up the subject to her dad when he doesn't see her consistent eating as a problem? and would it be healthy to put her on a diet?

butterfly on headWith love

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 3:54 PM
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67mermaid
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 4:08 PM

I would take her to a pediatrician..... the ped will give you some valuable tips on how to help her and how obesiety will effect her, then relay the news to your husband it will be the peds bad news not yours. You're then just a concerned parent who values his daughter.

Kim24kids
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 4:18 PM

I agree=) GL

Quoting 67mermaid:

I would take her to a pediatrician..... the ped will give you some valuable tips on how to help her and how obesiety will effect her, then relay the news to your husband it will be the peds bad news not yours. You're then just a concerned parent who values his daughter.


mirandas_mom
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 5:37 PM

His 8 year old weighs 135? Well, my 8 year old weighs 59 pounds. He needs to do something because she doesn't deserve to be this unhealthy. Does he realize the taunting she will endure in school? Not to mention the fact she is at higher risk of diabetes and other serious medical issues?

I think you need to have a serious talk with him. I also think you are a great step-mom for caring about your SD like this. :) 

ErikaRobin
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 5:51 PM

I'd like to point out something, if I may.   I'm going to suggest calling this a "lifestyle change" for your whole family instead of a "diet".  Diet sounds like a temporary fix and it sort of singles SD out when what really needs to happen is better eating and healthy living for a lifetime for everyone.  When you're all on board with this change (like many said in the other post about it) you'll have greater success overall. 

I think it's going to help your step-daughter tremendously and it won't be bad for the rest of the family at all.  :)

I wish you much luck in having this talk and showing your husband that there really are some important changes that need to be made.   

   
                                                                                    

hholllyy426
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 8:38 PM

I love this answer and I couldn't say it any better.

Quoting ErikaRobin:

I'd like to point out something, if I may.   I'm going to suggest calling this a "lifestyle change" for your whole family instead of a "diet".  Diet sounds like a temporary fix and it sort of singles SD out when what really needs to happen is better eating and healthy living for a lifetime for everyone.  When you're all on board with this change (like many said in the other post about it) you'll have greater success overall. 

I think it's going to help your step-daughter tremendously and it won't be bad for the rest of the family at all.  :)

I wish you much luck in having this talk and showing your husband that there really are some important changes that need to be made.   


  
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sandie66
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 8:58 PM

I have to agree. A doctor will not put an 8 year old on a "diet". You all need to get together and make a lifestyle change. You need to talk to him or at the very least let the pediatrician talk to him. You're talking juvenile diabetes here among other things. And yes, children are cruel and if it hasn't started yet, the name calling and teasing will start. He should have started worrying when she was no longer able to wear clothes that fit on a normal 8 year old. My sister is 41 and weighs 136 and is 5'4". This is seriously unhealthy for her. She should also be playing outside alot instead of being in the house watching tv or playing video games. This is where most of our children are "gaining" their weight. When we were younger you didn't hear of obese children or juvenile diabetes like you do now because we were outside playing and burning calories!! 

darcyh5
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 9:08 PM

Please do something now.  Is your husband the custodial parent?  I was overweight as a child, because my parents didnt care, did not stress nutrition/excercise.  I was teased endlessly and mercilessly all through school. 

I really think that my low self esteem, because of my weight allowed me to enter into two abusive, manipulative (although short) painful marriages. 

It wont be easy, but in the end it will be better for everyone.  I have two girls now, and one is rail thin, the other is chunky, but not overweight,.  SHe is solid muscle.  Anyway, diet and excercise are something that we really stress. 

By the way, I just had a new toddler start in my daycare, she is two and I bet weighs 60 lbs,   She wears a size 6 diaper and size 6 clothes.  The first day she came, she had waffles for breakfast before she came.  I serve breakfast at 9, she ate again and by 10 she was standing in front of my fridge screaming, 'fridge, I'm hungry'  we ate lunch at 11:30 and she literally ate half a frozen pizza, about 1/4 of a fresh cantaloupe and some green peppers. 

KidsHelper
by on Jan. 19, 2010 at 9:20 AM

My kids' school teaches "fitness is life" as their philosophy.  They don't diet or exercise for weight loss.  It is not allowed.  They are taught to eat healthy and be active.  I think that as the pp said, changing lifestyle is the best thing.  If you have her full-time, this won't be too hard.  If you share custody, then it could be harder.  I too was alarmed at her weight.  I am 5'3" and weigh that much.  My kids are 10 and 9, and together add up to about that.  I realize I have pretty small kids, but still, I was alarmed.  Please do something asap, but don't make it a huge deal.  If she gets the idea that she's fat and "not good enough" as she is, it could be very bad for the rest of her life.

rkoloms
by on Jan. 19, 2010 at 10:28 AM

Start a healthy lifestyle for the family; don't make this a child-specific issue.

  • don't buy junk foods
  • take a family walk after dinner
  • replace simple/white grains with whole grains
  • cut way back on, or eliminate, meat and dairy
  • prepare meals based on legumes, whole grains, vegetables and fruits

 

Robin in Chicago

graciebeth
by on Jan. 19, 2010 at 10:32 AM

My ten year old only weighs 69 lbs..and I do watch her diet, I have a niece who is 2 years younger than my daughter and she weighs about 10 lbs more than my daughter..I only buy healthy food, she doesn't get any junk food except on special occasions, but to her yogurt and grapes and apples are good, so if they get used to eating good stuff they will eventually like it..I don't blame you I would be worried about the child that is way too heavy for an 8 year old. I would just tell my husband that I am worried about her health.

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