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Sleepovers? Yes or No?

Posted by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:53 AM
  • 61 Replies

This question has come up a time or two-well many times actually with my 7.5 year old daughter. Her girlfriends are doing sleepovers!!! I am shocked. I made the decision, no sleepovers, ever. What good can come from this? I did sleepovers when I was a kid and we were pretty much always up to no good after the parents went to sleep. Most of the time if there were 3 girls, one would get the boot (3's a crowd) and end up teary eyed and wanting to go home at 11 at night. I don't get the hype with sleep overs-maybe someone can explain.

by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 11:53 AM
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Replies (1-10):
dlock25
by Member on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:14 PM

My seven year old just had a sleep over this past weekend. It went fine i thought. I don't like them personally. I think my own kids are enough. I don't like the idea of having to be in control of other kids. I love it when she goes to others to have a sleep over but thats because its fun for her and it gives us a free sitter (not to say that in a mean way what so ever).

justanotherjen
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:21 PM

My kids have never done a "sleepover" but my oldest daughter has been spending the night at her best friend's house since just before she turned 5.  Not only that but she's spent up to a week with them at a time.  In the summer she's usually gone for 3-5 days at a time over there and has gone on 2 vacations with them (one to Wisconsin Dells when she was 6 and to Cedar Point when she was 7--we live in Chicago for distance reference).

My other kids have never really shown an interest in spending the night anywhere.  They don't have any friends they are really close to like my oldest.  She's been friends with this girl her whole life and they almost share a birthday (her friend was born June 27 and my daughter was born June 28 of the next year, they've known each other since my dd was 3 weeks old).

I wouldn't have a problem with my other 2 older kids (7 and 8) spending the night at the house down the street.  They have 3 kids (10-boy, 7-girl and almost 4-girl).  All 4 of my kids are friends with them.

We don't usually have kids over here (day or night) because it's my dad's house and he doesn't like having people here.  But sleepovers don't have to mean staying up all night.  At 7 I would set a bedtime for the kids...everyone calming down and going to sleep by 11pm or they all get separated.


cakright
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:26 PM

I think its good for them to bond with their friends outside of school. Sleepovers are fun and promote independence....does she know she can be away from you for a night and still be okay and loved? Why not let her try one and decide if its for her or not.

DanYle
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:32 PM

I do not have a problem with sleep overs but do have certain requirements. Such as no odd number of children that way even if two get cliquey there is not some one left out. I also have to have met the parents first, whether they are coming to our house or she is going to theres. Luckily my daughter is in a small school and I knew all the parents before the sleep overs started. I can't see denying her the opportunity to do sleep overs. I think they are a fun part of childhood. We do not do a lot of them. Maybe only every couple of months but she enjoys them. My husband or I tend to stay up until the girls are alseep (we usually ask then to go to sleep at midnight if they have not already go to sleep). And I always make sure to give them lots of activities so they are all usually asleep by 11.

DanYle     Mommy to Two beautiful girls and a baby on the way (hoping for a boy)




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StephanieSH
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:40 PM

I don't really get sleepovers when they are this young either.   My kids are 7 and 4 and they have spent the night at their grandparents' house but that's it.  Honestly, my kids are all I can handle at night.  I don't think I could deal.  Also, my son is a lot of work and I would worry about him at someone else's house overnight.  I might let him spend the night at his best friend's house but I know the family really well.  In our area, it seems to be a more popular activity for the girls. 

GenevieveD
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:41 PM

My oldest is 7 and she has then all the time.


I always had a great time having sleepovers when I was kid, I never had too much drama going on. Just eating food and watching movies.


rousefam5
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 12:53 PM

We have lots of playdates and my daughter will go to her friends to play as well. There are many ways for her to exercise her independence but sleepovers just aren't an option for our kids. I have learned, however, never say never :) I can appreciate both views.

Quoting cakright:

I think its good for them to bond with their friends outside of school. Sleepovers are fun and promote independence....does she know she can be away from you for a night and still be okay and loved? Why not let her try one and decide if its for her or not.


mistynights234
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:32 PM

 My youngest can have friends come here all she wants but wont spend the night at friends houses.  AT 7 She is a home girl when it comes to night time so I dont see this problem coming up any time soon.  I let my oldest spend the night at a friends house that we knew and felt comfortable with and it ended up with my daughter having a horrible experience.  

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MommyKat
by on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:44 PM

Slumber parties can be bad(such as the three or more) but sleepovers are great!

I worry about the other male in the house being a sexual predator but you can't live your life in fear.  To minimize potential damages I make sure my kids friends are welcome at my house.  Than I know for a fact what they are up to.  If I don't feel that the other parent does enough in making sure that everyone is safe and supervised then my child is not allowed at their house.

I didn't have enough friends growing up because of my parents strict rules.  So as much as I can I allow my kids opportunity to build and maintain friendships.  Within reason of course.  I will not allow a bad influence or allow them to go to an unsafe situation.

fatcat0908
by Bronze Member on Jan. 25, 2010 at 1:49 PM

My daughter is just turning 7 and she loves sleepovers. She has had girlfriends stay here and she has slept over their houses. The only time she has ever stayed with multiple children at a time for a sleepover though was/is when she stays at my in-laws when her cousins are in from out of town. I grew up on sleepovers and I am glad she enjoys them so much. Some of my best memories of my friends from elementary are from when we were having sleepovers.

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