My son has been behind in reading and writing since kindergarten. He has gone to extra help and summer school and although he has improved, it's just not a big enough improvement and he's still behind. The school and his teachers seem to think him getting c's is average and nothing to worry about, but I do!
I've been thinking about keeping him back in 2nd grade for another year because if he can't do 2nd grade word sufficiantly, how is he going to do 3rd grade work and I don't want him falling even more behind. I think I should do it now, while he's still young and there is less chance of him being made fun of for being held back.
Do you think this is a good idea or should I just let him continue on and trust the teachers and the school know what they're doing?
i held my son back in kindergarden cuz he was too far behind. Hes also autistic.
You need to do what YOU feel is best for your child.
Why dont you talk to him, his teacher again, school councilor, & maybe even the principal & see what they have to say then go from there...
Despite your feelings of him needing to be held back that might not be whats best in the long run for him. He might feel like a failure & then go down hill from there. but if you dont he might fail the 3rd grade in either case he'd b held back.
Bryan 5/29/03, Kevin 4/14/06, Mason 10/6/09
I'm struggling with this same thing with my son in 1st grade. He's just always a little behind and pulling C's as well. I was thinking since he's so young that maybe it wouldn't be such a huge shock but when I've brought it up with him he screams and cries and pleads with me, "mommy don't make me stay back". It breaks my heart because he doesn't want to stay back but he's not quite at level where he should be and I'm afraid it will only get worse as you are. I'll be having another meeting with his teacher soon and we'll decide then. Best of luck to you and your decision.
Quoting Amy385:
i held my son back in kindergarden cuz he was too far behind. Hes also autistic.
You need to do what YOU feel is best for your child.
Why dont you talk to him, his teacher again, school councilor, & maybe even the principal & see what they have to say then go from there...
Despite your feelings of him needing to be held back that might not be whats best in the long run for him. He might feel like a failure & then go down hill from there. but if you dont he might fail the 3rd grade in either case he'd b held back.
Because of the No Child Left Behind Act, they seem to pass children to the next grade that seem to be having difficulty. They do give them extra help both in school and after in order to try and get them up to speed, but that doesn't always work. I've talked to both the teacher and the councilor and they just seem to shrug it off and make me feel like I'm crazy.
My son is VERY frustrated now because he's having such a hard time with the reading and writing and I worry that him moving on to the next grade will dishearten him even more. But then I also worry that if I do hold him back for another year, he will hate school even more and his self esteem will falter.
I love my little guy and it makes me so sad that I even have to think about making a decision like this. It's scary to think you might make the wrong one and it will affect him negatively for the rest of his life!
I would have a talk witht he school psychologist and have his processing tested and also tested for Inattention ADD, so you can have more information on how his brain is functioning when doing tasks. Is his lack of reading comprehension a result of loss of focus or getting distracted? Is his writing because he gets distracted and loses his thought process, forgets what he is thinking mid-task?
How is he at home? Does he get scatterbrained or distracted easily? If you tell him to go get dressed will you find him in his room doing something else?.... think of how he might be at home and what might be carrying over at school and vice versa? Is he younger than his classmates? Is he immature?
You still have 4 months to try to improve. See if you can find out if there is more contributing to his average progress before you decide to hold him back. If he is shown to have inattention, you can talk to your pediatrician. I have a friend whose daughter had trouble in school and was prescribed focalin and saw a marked improvement in her grades and her actions, and it didn't zombieize her like other medications are known to do that treat adhd.
Do some research on the benefits vs disadvantages of holding kids back. Schools are doing this less and less these days because it is not really very helpful academically and it hurts kids a lot socially. What they are finding is that having a kid repeat another year of something that already isn't working for them doesn't really help all that much the second time around either. Kids rarely catch up academically in the year they are held back. Most of the evidence is that there are rarely much benefit and a lot of drawbacks. I would push the school to help my child more through Chapter one or other inschool programs, and/or look into private tutoring rather than pushing the school to hold him back.
Quoting mom22tumblebugs:
I would have a talk witht he school psychologist and have his processing tested and also tested for Inattention ADD, so you can have more information on how his brain is functioning when doing tasks. Is his lack of reading comprehension a result of loss of focus or getting distracted? Is his writing because he gets distracted and loses his thought process, forgets what he is thinking mid-task?
He recently had surgery on his ears because he was basically deaf in one ear. This they think was what was affecting his ability to hear certain sounds and why he fell so far behind. Since the surgery, I and his teacher have noticed a big difference, but I fear it's too late and he needs some time to catch up to the other kids in his grade. His math skills are actually above normal and he doesnot behavioral problems in school or at home.
How is he at home? Does he get scatterbrained or distracted easily? If you tell him to go get dressed will you find him in his room doing something else?.... think of how he might be at home and what might be carrying over at school and vice versa? Is he younger in his class? Is he immature?
He actually gets up on his own everyday, gets dressed, eats and is ready to go before the girls even get out of bed. He is the type of child who thrives on a schedule and gets upset when he gets off it. He plays on his own for hours, but does seem to get bored very easily and moves on to something else rather quickly.
You still have 4 months to try to improve. See if you can find out if there is more contributing to his average progress before you decide to hold him back. If he is shown to have inattention, you can talk to your pediatrician. I have a friend whose daughter had trouble in school and was prescribed focalin and saw a marked improvement in her grades and her actions, and it didn't zombieize her like other medications are known to do that treat adhd.
My husband also says to wait and see until the end of the school year to see if there is an improvement. I can't place the poor child on any more meds because he already takes them for asthama and alergies. I hope he just needs time to catch up now that he can actually HEAR.
Quoting riotgrrl:
Do some research on the benefits vs disadvantages of holding kids back. Schools are doing this less and less these days because it is not really very helpful academically and it hurts kids a lot socially. What they are finding is that having a kid repeat another year of something that already isn't working for them doesn't really help all that much the second time around either. Kids rarely catch up academically in the year they are held back. Most of the evidence is that there are rarely much benefit and a lot of drawbacks. I would push the school to help my child more through Chapter one or other inschool programs, and/or look into private tutoring rather than pushing the school to hold him back.
This is actually a great idea because his grandmother work at Sylvan as a tutor. Maybe she'll help him a few hours a week. She's on her way to Haiti right now on a missions trip though... so who knows when she'll be back.
He is in Tile 1 reading at school and that teacher says she has seen some improvement... maybe I'm just paranoid. Both of my girls are gifted and I've never had to deal with issues like this. I know you shouldn't compare children to each other, but I can't help it- it's all new to me and scary!
I would wait and see how he is doing when the end of the year comes around. Kids can learn alot in a few months. Also next year does he have to the the FCAT. If he does he has to pass in 3rd grade or he won't be moved up. So maybe wait and see till next year.
Ok.. this may sound strange... but do you have a Nintendo DS? There is actually a lot of reading and some people have said that their child's reading has improved a lot b/c of all the reading they need to do to play the DS games. I bought my daughter a DSi for Xmas and she is reading some very complicated words now and understanding the tutorials on her own.
You can also purchase grade level reading comprehension books from barnes and noble.
Sister's kids' parties and events....too much...need advice
- IhartU
on Jan. 27, 2010 at 9:43 AM