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are your kids better at home or at school?

Posted by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:28 PM
  • 25 Replies

My girls behavior is PERFECT at school.  They are wonderful students. Jess was the only one picked in her class last year to go to the special field trip for good behavior all year long. They have only gotten about one bad mark on their conduct sheet each year. BUT HOME is a totally different story. They make messes and refuse to clean up, they fight with each other, LOUD in the house after i repeatedly ask them to quiet down and remind them of how it is at school. despite me constantly telling them to stay seated at the kitchen table they keep getting up. I guess thats part of my fault because at their toddler ages when they were starting to learn table manners dh was always at work during dinner and i was busy trying to nurse/feed an infant or fix another the others plate and i wasn't strict enough then because it was too difficult to keep enforcing it while i have a infant on my breast. But now I KNOW they know the rules because they follow them at school, or they would get in trouble in the cafeteria. I remind them that they behave there. And why is it, when its all 3 home its like a 3 ring circus but when its only one they are angels? My 4yo does better than my girls in putting his dishes in the sink when hes done eating but the girls i keep having to remind them. Whats it like in your house?

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:28 PM
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by Emerald Member on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:36 PM

 The problem is the same problem that we all have.  We are all much more comfortable and relaxed in our own homes.  We all know that there is public behavior and we have to be on our best behvior while in public.  After a long day of being on their best behavior at school, I'm sure that they are thrilled to be home where they can relax some and be more themselves.  That doesn't mean that you shouldn't be enforcing your rules in your home.  They do need to have respect for you and their home.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:38 PM

My kids are themselves 24/7. We home-school so they are here all the time. Now, they are usually better behaved in public because they are more comfortable at home.


Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God? 

"Oppression of spirit is not on the public school curriculum. Rather, it's a noxious by-product produced while stewing schooling in a pot w/ unions, administrators, multi-billion dollar budgets, state education departments, and school boards, then letting politicians control the heat." Linda Dobson

"When you want to teach children to think, you begin by treating them seriously when they are little, giving them responsibilities, talking to them candidly, providing privacy and solitude for them, and making them readers and thinkers of significant thoughts from the beginning. That's *if* you want to teach them to think." ~ Bertrand Russell

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:41 PM

 My kids are the same as yours, complete angels at school than they come home and make messes and fight with each other all night.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:41 PM

 I have the same problem, it drives me crazy. I will pick up my son and my daughter and him will start arguing before the seat belts are even buckled.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:50 PM

Yes,  My MIL calles it "Street Angels, House Devils"....  they save their worst behavior for those that they KNOW love them!   

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:53 PM

yep here boys are angels at soon as we get in the car , it starts....sometimes im not even home yet and their at each other......ughhhh..well i rather that then them mis behaving in school.....

by Barbara on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:54 PM

My son is great at home, and he's a trouble maker at school. It's been a struggle to deal with over the years too. It's hard to try to correct behaviors that you don't encounter yourself.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:57 PM
I'm glad I'm not the only one, and I never thought about it like that. They are comfortable around me and have been on a tight "schedule" at school that they just let loose. Maybe the solution is to find some outlet for them to release some energy before hw/dinner time. So we can do those things and get bedtime routine going and do something calm like movie/books/board game before actual bedtime. Any ideas? They struggle going outside now cuz they play in the heat at recess then get off the bus drenched in sweat. My tolerance is pretty low right now because I've been so sick and tired.
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by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 7:59 PM

My boys are about the same at home and school. The change comes when grandma is around. They become demanding, mouthy little brats around her. She refuses to disciple and will stop me from doing it too. I can not handle going anywhere with them with her.

by on Aug. 19, 2011 at 8:37 PM

 My daughter is the same way. At school she is this perfect angel but when she gets home it is like the devil is in my house. She dont listen, she dont pick up after herself, yelling, screaming, throwing fits. I always ask her why her teacher gets the good side of her and I get the misbehave side. She says i dont know but she is only 5 so. best of luck to all you moms out there.

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