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What’s up with this “Play Date” Phenomenon?

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Ok moms, please explain the Play date thing.  I just don't get it.  My kids have many friends at school, church,  sports and dance teams, neighborhood and close family friends.  What I don't understand it the whole play date thing.  Is this something a group of fancy moms made up and now everyone has jumped on the band wagon?  Is this an organized event or is this a necessary thing?  Is this planned play time?  When I was a child, I never heard my mom say anything about play dates.  We just went outside and played, road our bikes, played in the yard with close friends.  There was no play date.  When my parents visited close friends, we just ended up playing together.   If I call up a friend and say let's take the kids to the zoo, Is that a play date?    Am I just out of the loop or do I need to jump on this play date band wagon?  Can someone please explain it to me?


by on Oct. 17, 2011 at 12:30 PM
Replies (11-20):
DDDaysh
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 3:56 PM
2 moms liked this

 What if your children don't have any friends in the neighborhood, or even other kids their age?  My son didn't until just a couple of years ago, and even now it's only one other little boy and his parents are very protective. 

If you don't live in an area where the kid can just walk down the street and find another kid to say "hey, lets play" then you HAVE to schedule time to run into other kids.  It doesn't happen by just bumping into them because there isn't anyone to bump into! 

But honestly, it's not an everyday thing for us.  It's just, if there's a friend my son wants to spend more time with, outside of activities and school, yeah, I'm going to try to schedule a time for him to do that.  Why not? 

lwalker270
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 4:04 PM

We used to do play dates a LOT when my boys were smaller.  We live in an area where we don't have any family.  When we first moved here we didn't know anyone and the boys didn't go to preschool yet, so they obviously didn't have school friends.  In addition we live in an older neighborhood and there are few children in the same age range on our street.  

As we started to meet people, it was a great way for the kids to develop social skills and for me to have adult conversation.  Both the boys and I have made lasting friendships through our play dates.  As they've grown and have made friends through school, church, sports, etc.  we typically don't schedule play dates, but still continue to get together with many of our buddies from our play date days.

*shrugs*  Don't like 'em, don't do 'em.  Problem solved.

ArmyGal
by New Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 4:11 PM

I'm guessing this is an attempt to make yourself seem like a better parent? Obviously you know what it is. Some people, like myself, live in an area with old retired people. So sometimes I have to make play dates with my sister's SIL because she has 5 kids and is always on the run. Plus my sister lives nearly 2hrs away so I can't see her unless we set things up. I havent seen any kids on my block beside my daughter. She does go to daycare, Korean school, and the gym's daycare, but that's about it.

obamamama1
by on Oct. 17, 2011 at 4:41 PM


Quoting ArmyGal:

I'm guessing this is an attempt to make yourself seem like a better parent? Obviously you know what it is. Some people, like myself, live in an area with old retired people. So sometimes I have to make play dates with my sister's SIL because she has 5 kids and is always on the run. Plus my sister lives nearly 2hrs away so I can't see her unless we set things up. I havent seen any kids on my block beside my daughter. She does go to daycare, Korean school, and the gym's daycare, but that's about it.

No I don't think that at all.  I just don't understand what it is for.  Perhaps I am an older parent my oldest child is 24 years old and my youngest is 4 and I have no grandchildren.  We just did not do this type of thing when my older kids were growing up.  It must be a "new  generation Mom thing."  I just can't hear myself calling a friend and saying lets have a play date.  It sounds funny just typing it.  So if you feel offended, by my ignorance (lack of knowledge)... what can I say?  I have been an Army Wife for 27 years and have traveled the world, but I don't know anythng about a play date.  But, when I joined this site, all I read about is Moms wanting  and asking for a play date.

lwalker270
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 4:46 PM


Quoting obamamama1:


Quoting ArmyGal:

I'm guessing this is an attempt to make yourself seem like a better parent? Obviously you know what it is. Some people, like myself, live in an area with old retired people. So sometimes I have to make play dates with my sister's SIL because she has 5 kids and is always on the run. Plus my sister lives nearly 2hrs away so I can't see her unless we set things up. I havent seen any kids on my block beside my daughter. She does go to daycare, Korean school, and the gym's daycare, but that's about it.

No I don't think that at all.  I just don't understand what it is for.  Perhaps I am an older parent my oldest child is 24 years old and my youngest is 4 and I have no grandchildren.  We just did not do this type of thing when my older kids were growing up.  It must be a "new  generation Mom thing."  I just can't hear myself calling a friend and saying lets have a play date.  It sounds funny just typing it.  So if you feel offended, by my ignorance (lack of knowledge)... what can I say?  I have been an Army Wife for 27 years and have traveled the world, but I don't know anythng about a play date.  But, when I joined this site, all I read about is Moms wanting  and asking for a play date.

You never got together with your friends and let the kids play?  I'm in my 40's and I remember my mom getting together with her friends on the weekend and all the kids playing, it's the same thing.

obamamama1
by on Oct. 17, 2011 at 5:10 PM

Yes, I do all the time.  But it was never called a "a play date."  Maybe it's new mommy jargon that I have not caught on to yet.  If you are in your 40's you know darn well your mother never said play date.

Quoting lwalker270:


Quoting obamamama1:


Quoting ArmyGal:

I'm guessing this is an attempt to make yourself seem like a better parent? Obviously you know what it is. Some people, like myself, live in an area with old retired people. So sometimes I have to make play dates with my sister's SIL because she has 5 kids and is always on the run. Plus my sister lives nearly 2hrs away so I can't see her unless we set things up. I havent seen any kids on my block beside my daughter. She does go to daycare, Korean school, and the gym's daycare, but that's about it.

No I don't think that at all.  I just don't understand what it is for.  Perhaps I am an older parent my oldest child is 24 years old and my youngest is 4 and I have no grandchildren.  We just did not do this type of thing when my older kids were growing up.  It must be a "new  generation Mom thing."  I just can't hear myself calling a friend and saying lets have a play date.  It sounds funny just typing it.  So if you feel offended, by my ignorance (lack of knowledge)... what can I say?  I have been an Army Wife for 27 years and have traveled the world, but I don't know anythng about a play date.  But, when I joined this site, all I read about is Moms wanting  and asking for a play date.

You never got together with your friends and let the kids play?  I'm in my 40's and I remember my mom getting together with her friends on the weekend and all the kids playing, it's the same thing.


lwalker270
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 5:46 PM
1 mom liked this
I never said my mom called them play dates, I said it was the same thing as what people call play dates today. And really, who cares what they're called? It's socalization for mom and kids, which isn't a bad thing.

Quoting obamamama1:

Yes, I do all the time.  But it was never called a "a play date."  Maybe it's new mommy jargon that I have not caught on to yet.  If you are in your 40's you know darn well your mother never said play date.


Quoting lwalker270:


Quoting obamamama1:



Quoting ArmyGal:

I'm guessing this is an attempt to make yourself seem like a better parent? Obviously you know what it is. Some people, like myself, live in an area with old retired people. So sometimes I have to make play dates with my sister's SIL because she has 5 kids and is always on the run. Plus my sister lives nearly 2hrs away so I can't see her unless we set things up. I havent seen any kids on my block beside my daughter. She does go to daycare, Korean school, and the gym's daycare, but that's about it.

No I don't think that at all.  I just don't understand what it is for.  Perhaps I am an older parent my oldest child is 24 years old and my youngest is 4 and I have no grandchildren.  We just did not do this type of thing when my older kids were growing up.  It must be a "new  generation Mom thing."  I just can't hear myself calling a friend and saying lets have a play date.  It sounds funny just typing it.  So if you feel offended, by my ignorance (lack of knowledge)... what can I say?  I have been an Army Wife for 27 years and have traveled the world, but I don't know anythng about a play date.  But, when I joined this site, all I read about is Moms wanting  and asking for a play date.

You never got together with your friends and let the kids play?  I'm in my 40's and I remember my mom getting together with her friends on the weekend and all the kids playing, it's the same thing.


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rockinmomto2
by Bronze Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 5:48 PM

It's mostly geared towards SAHMs who have small children who don't have friends yet.

M4LG5
by Gold Member on Oct. 17, 2011 at 5:54 PM

that's funny that you said this because i posted that for us as working parents, we have to schedule it in because of how busy we are.


I can definitely see all moms doing it and I think the term "play date" is new but still the same as "hey, let's get together"

Quoting rockinmomto2:

It's mostly geared towards SAHMs who have small children who don't have friends yet.


momk23
by on Oct. 17, 2011 at 6:05 PM

I think it's the term "play date" that a lot of people don't like.  I feel silly using the term, but I do schedule days ahead of time.  Like this friday I plan on taking my kids to the park, I'll email a few of my friends and say, "hey, we are doing this, want to join us?".  I guess that's a playdate.  My kids do have friends that we will just call on a moment's notice, mostly in our neighborhood, but they also have friends that don't live really close to us, so we plan things a few days in advance to make sure we see each other.  Really, no big deal.

Quoting M4LG5:

that's funny that you said this because i posted that for us as working parents, we have to schedule it in because of how busy we are.


I can definitely see all moms doing it and I think the term "play date" is new but still the same as "hey, let's get together"

Quoting rockinmomto2:

It's mostly geared towards SAHMs who have small children who don't have friends yet.



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