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Friend Advise?

Posted by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 11:32 AM
  • 7 Replies

Hi, my name is Tracy. I have two girls, ages 14 and 11. I am currently worried about my 11 year old 5th grader. She is a one friend type of girl. She plays with other kids, too, but she looks at the other girl as her soul mate, her forever friend (like me and my best friend, whom I have had since childhood). This friend and her have been best friends for six years. This girl has gone on vacations with us multiple times and used to come over a couple of times a month. This relationship is always one sided. My daughter has only been invited to their house twice in six years! Now this girl won't talk to my daughter saying my daughter did something wrong. My daughter tried to find out what she did, crying for days when no answer was given. She was treated poorly for days. i just heard that in actuality the mom told this little girl that they were too close and since they will be in separate schools next year, they should cut all ties now. I am having a big problem with this. Why would the mom do this? They will be separated soon enough. Their friendship could have died of natural causes. And why make my daughter feel like she did something wrong? I am angry!! I feel so bad for my daughter. Am I the only one that thinks this is horrible?? BTW I had a problem with this relationship, also. My daughter is the caretaker and the other girl takes adavantage of her and talks to her like she is nothing, BUT when I would try to say anything, my daughter would defend her friend. I know this is not why the mom made the call, as she was never around them together to witness it. I am just really mad that this could not have waited 4 more months. No feelings hurt that way.


by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 11:32 AM
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Replies (1-7):
Cindy18
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 11:41 AM

 There is really nothing you can do. Just be there for your DD and comfort her.

Doesn't sound like this was really a healthy friendship anyway.

gingerwife
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 11:46 AM

I know it probably breaks your daughters heart, but it was gonna happen sooner or later, so just work on helping her through it.  The way it happened is totally out of your control, but helping her through it IS in your control. 

incognito116
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 11:48 AM
Why would you want your daughter around this girl? Teach her some self confidence and self worth.
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trfr75
by on Feb. 12, 2012 at 12:04 PM

Trust me. I agree. This has been a great time for lessons about not only how you treat people, but how you should expect to be treated. However, bottom line is, her heart is still breaking. It has been a few weeks now. She just told me she wanted me to listen to a song. I'm a Survivor. I told her I had heard it before and she said listen to the words.


Now that you're out of my life 
I'm so much better 
You thought that I'd be weak without you 
But I'm stronger 

You thought that I'd be broke without you 
But I'm richer 
You thought that I'd be sad without you 
I laugh harder 

You thought I wouldn't grow without you 
Now I'm wiser 
Though that I'd be helpless without you 
But I'm smarter 


She said, "Mama. I'm gonna be ok". God, I am so proud of my little girl!!!!

wakymom
by Ruby Member on Feb. 12, 2012 at 5:00 PM

 

Quoting trfr75:

Trust me. I agree. This has been a great time for lessons about not only how you treat people, but how you should expect to be treated. However, bottom line is, her heart is still breaking. It has been a few weeks now. She just told me she wanted me to listen to a song. I'm a Survivor. I told her I had heard it before and she said listen to the words.

 

Now that you're out of my life 
I'm so much better 
You thought that I'd be weak without you 
But I'm stronger 

You thought that I'd be broke without you 
But I'm richer 
You thought that I'd be sad without you 
I laugh harder 

You thought I wouldn't grow without you 
Now I'm wiser 
Though that I'd be helpless without you 
But I'm smarter 

 

She said, "Mama. I'm gonna be ok". God, I am so proud of my little girl!!!!

 I'm sorry she's had to go through this, but wow, what an amazingly mature view she has of it now! You're doing a good job, momma.

 

 

 

 

 

kmrtigger
by Kandice on Feb. 12, 2012 at 7:25 PM

Welcome to the group.

I agree with another mom who posted. It doesn't look as if there was much you could have done.

kmrtigger
by Kandice on Feb. 12, 2012 at 7:26 PM

She is ONE SMART girl.

Quoting trfr75:

Trust me. I agree. This has been a great time for lessons about not only how you treat people, but how you should expect to be treated. However, bottom line is, her heart is still breaking. It has been a few weeks now. She just told me she wanted me to listen to a song. I'm a Survivor. I told her I had heard it before and she said listen to the words.


Now that you're out of my life 
I'm so much better 
You thought that I'd be weak without you 
But I'm stronger 

You thought that I'd be broke without you 
But I'm richer 
You thought that I'd be sad without you 
I laugh harder 

You thought I wouldn't grow without you 
Now I'm wiser 
Though that I'd be helpless without you 
But I'm smarter 


She said, "Mama. I'm gonna be ok". God, I am so proud of my little girl!!!!


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