I didn't have a so called allowance growing up, My family owned a hotel so it was just a necessity that I would help with my younger siblings during the summer months. I know my mother held a lot of responsibility on me and I'm glad she did. I had 3 jobs at age 16, I was paying rent to her, buying all of my own things and paid off my first car in months. I have always had a strong work ethic. My DH and I just combined our families last Oct, and I have thought about doing an allowance (again for his boys, he lost his job last year so they had to give up that expense) We are just getting back on our feet between the two of us; I'm a full-time student, and work 32 hours a week and DH owns his own computer repair business that is picking up a lot more work. His boys ages 5 & 9 use to get $20 & 15 a week but that was back when daddy was making more. but it was also a stipulation that the boys become more responsible about needs like they had to buy their own shoes, 10%per went to contributions, and they had to "pay" dh for gas/snacks for their extra after school stuff. My girls ages 5 & 4 have never really had a set allowance; their dad and I struggled from 07" on after we both lost our jobs; I went to be a full time student but FASFA only covered the bills and no extras; my girls are use to this and hardly ever ask for something at the store.
Even though we are surviving pretty well now, I still have some back debt I am trying to pay down before I leave school. We are heavly budgeted for example I have set up our budget til Fall Semester and we have !$250 extra for spending other than that ALL bills are paid for.
I will not be paying for the regular chores that are expected from each kid. but this is where I sit. My girls are usually really good about "keeping up" their bedroom. they have the smallest room with little floor space so even one set of toys sitting out looks like a bomb has exploded. They also spend every weekend at their dads house, and have far more to do there in terms of messing up a space lol. I also have always made the match up on clothes for them doing laundry and hung them for the girls b/c both of my girls are little fasionistas and sometimes pick the dumbest/wildest/not weather appoporiate clothes. I don't mind doing this b/c all of us girls have skin allergies so we use a diffrent soap then the boys, and usually theirs end up in loads with mine. I have one daughter that asks to come home from daycare early so she can wash dishes, while the other feels like its a death sentence. My Kinder is really good about waking up in the morning and getting ready (I work til 7a and the bus picks up at 7:30 so its all up to her some mornings) while the other daughter will wait til I'm home for me to drag her out. Then comes the boys; the 9 year old has had soooo many issues with homework; his teacher writes out every assignment they did and which ones he hasn't completed (this has been happening for the last month he is failing all his classes) every day for the last month he has come home and done his homework; we found out about a week and a half ago for the last 3 weeks he hasn't turned in most of the assignments, and the ones he has turned in our un-completed. We spent all last week staying up til 11p each night doing all the missing assignments and regular homework. with us checking each problem every 5 problems. The youngest boy had some serious behivor issues two weeks ago which ended up sending him to the prinpl twice. Every day last week we both would ask him if he had to turn his card and each time he would say no he was on green everyday. Well come weekly folder check on Friday and we found out he lied Every single day. He was but on restriction from the tv all weekend. He also not only throws screaming fits like a 2 year old at home but also at school; he is quick tempered and has earned the nickname "the dictator"
Ok so here is my thought process....for the 4 year old she would get $1.05 a week (which is .15 a day) for the 5 year olds $1.40 a week (.20 a day) and the 9 year old $1.75 a week (.25 a day) They won't have any restrictions on spending, and there is always opportunties for extra money (cleaning yard, deep cleaning kit or bathroom, ect) but this allows them to buy a candy bar or save for something (we don't allow any candy in our home but will allow it once every few months outside the home)
I'm thinking of having a ball in jar system (hard to explain on paper) I figure they start out with 7 balls (one for each day) if they misbehave more than 2 times (2 time-outs) they loose their ball for the day, if they have more then 2 outburst on top of the other 2 from earlier they loose the ball for the next day. Any lying (we don't allow it at ALL) or notes sent home from school they loose the daily ball, and any un-completed homework/school work that week they loose a ball. Each ball will represent the daily amount, and that will be subtracted from the weekly pay. What does everyone think? I know over time we will become a little more lax on the rules but until we can get everyone on the same page something needs to happen. I already currently pay $.50 a job for the xtras.
I figure once all balls are gone they won't get any allowance, and if they continue bad behavoir then they loose the regular innotab time by day. I have thought about instead of 7 balls using 12 so they at least get a buffer before they loose but with my girls they will always get their allowance so I don't know if that is fair or not.
Sister's kids' parties and events....too much...need advice
- Cambriagurlmom
on Feb. 14, 2012 at 5:39 AM