Cops Go Overboard In 'Protecting' Black Girl From Her White Grandfather
Cops Go Overboard In 'Protecting' Black Girl From Her White Grandfather
Picture this: you're walking down the street, and you spot a middle-aged white man strolling down the sidewalk. Beside him is a black girl,
about 5 years old, bouncing and chattering on as 5-year-olds do. Now
for the pop quiz portion of our day: would you A. Smile and keep walking
or B. Call the cops?
Unfortunately for Scott Henson, a blogger from Austin, Texas, people in his 'hood believe "B" is the proper response. For the second time in 5 years, the grandpa was recently detained by police for doing what grandfathers do: hanging out with his granddaughter Ty. So much for progress, huh, America?
As it goes national, the story of little Ty insisting Henson was her Grandpa, only to watch police take him away in handcuffs (he was later released when they realized their racial profiling was ridiculous) is being treated as one that aptly illustrates the racial divide that remains in America, even in a post-Obama world. It certainly does; the racial issues cannot be ignored here.
But I'm going to take it one step farther. This isn't simply a story of race. It's a story of gender.
Because Henson isn't simply a white person with a black child. He was a white male with a small girl, in a world where anyone with a penis is still treated as an inherent threat to anyone under the age of majority. And before you protest, allow me to proffer a few examples.
The Free-Range Kids blog recently unearthed a little gem from a parenting advice column wherein parents expressed abject terror over having to send their child to a sleepover where, gasp, the only responsible adult on premises was a divorced DAD! Oh my horrors, an involved parent trying to let his kid actually have a normal social life!
And did you know that men only account for 16 percent of the ranks of elementary school teachers in America? Perhaps it's because of attitudes like the one I noted on a parenting message board recently, where moms were gathering their pitchforks to support a fellow mom who was angry that her school district would not allow her to have her child's kindergarten assignment changed from the male teacher to a female.
Something as simple as hiring a male babysitter can get the pearls a clanking in the mommy circles as they all clutch them to their chests and cluck at you. Forget that he's the kid's uncle and would throw himself in front of a bus to protect her, he's not to be trusted because he's got a dangler between those legs!
The problem with any of these assumptions based solely on gender is that they don't take into account character. A divorced mom could be a chain smoking floozy parading men and in and out while your kid is chilling at her brothel, er, house. A female teacher could be a raging bi-otch. A girl babysitter could lock your kid in a closet. But hey, you just assumed she was the better choice because she was ... a SHE.
What about all the wonderful dads, uncles, cousins, sons, nephews, and grandfathers out there? Guys like Scott Henson, like my dad, who actually enjoy hanging out with their granddaughters so their daughter and son-in-law can have a night off, are one of the world's great gifts to kids. But they're lost in a society that has abandoned reason in favor of fear.
As much as the race issue seems to have played a role in the Henson case in Austin, I can't help but wonder if someone had stepped back and looked at him and his granddaughter simply as people -- not black and white, not male and female -- what they would have seen. An adult with a child? A person responsible enough to grab the child's hand when they crossed the street and a child who was on top of the world to have the sole attention of said adult?
Who's the man in your life who has given so much to your child?
My son father and my dad has influence my son life.
I think authority are being caution after the Elizabeth smart abduction.
In general, I agree with the article.
I have people gasp when I tell them I will let DH help bathe and change our soon-to-be born DD! He's her father, but OMG he should never put her in a tub or help change her diapers...I had someone ask me "But what if he gets curious!?"
Curious about WHAT? What exactly?
It makes me sick. Yes, we need to use caution and common sense when it comes to who watches our children, MALE OR FEMALE. But to insist we can't trust any male ever is crazy. Oh, and BTW, women are just as capable of sexual abuses as men are.
As for the race side of this story, that is just sad. Kudos to people calling in their concern, b/c that "what if" is a powerful thing. But seriously, does he need to carry some sort of proof? And this was the second time it has happened? Hopefully as the girl gets older she can learn to look past these things and be believed when she insists he's her relative. Families can have all sorts of races in them these days!
My brother is great with my daughters. My husband and my father. My grandfather and my husbands dad and grandfather. They are all wonderful men. I would trust any of them to take care of my girls. Some of my favorite teachers were men.
On another note though I am not sure I would trust a strange man to babysit my daughters. But I also would not trust a woman I didn't know well to watch them either.
My DH, my dad, and my BIL's are all great role models for DD and I trust any of them to watch DD alone any time. That being said, I am more cautious of men I don't know than I am of women I don't know.
I agree the primary reason he was reported was because he was a he. If it were a middle-age white woman, likely nobody would have done more than take a second glance. Then they would likely think that she adopted the girl.
It's really unfair to the majority of good men out there that they are regarded with suspicion whenever they express even the tiniest interest in what a child is doing, etc.
Really, this is just one more way stereotyping hurts innocent people everyday.
My mom is Irish....my dad Mexican. I took after my dad and so i'm much more brown than the rest of my siblings. When I was young, my mom watched my cousin...blonde hair, blue eyes....just like my brother. I also had a sister that was very light skinned with dirty blonde hair.
At the store, people would come up to my mom and talk about us kids and then someone would ask..."are all of these yours?" and she would reply, "all but one" and then i would be the one pointed out as "not the one".
Funny story but in the context of this story, things could have gone out of hand.
Sister's kids' parties and events....too much...need advice
- Cafe MichelleP
on Feb. 15, 2012 at 10:06 AM